I crave death quietly;
a cotton blanket caressing me;
this life is one not meant to  
be.

Death, I would not seek you out,
but if you asked me for a dance,
I would.
Because I know without a doubt
Death would be another chance.

I hugged myself one night.

Amidst angry words I heard
despite their silence;
among the eyes of those
who were not there;
against anything and
everything I’ve
ever done;

I hugged the flesh that carved itself;
engulfed the form I’ve never known;
I kissed my heart, too weak to fight;

I held myself one night.

And oh,

What it felt like to be loved.

(Finally.)