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Feb 2015 · 542
The World Across the Gates
Julia Rae Irvine Feb 2015
Walking into a train station
is like walking through a wrinkle in time.

Somehow the gravity and the energy of the hustle and bustle of the metropolis around you
finds its center. Not so slowly,
it begins to stir.

People are going places, moving too quickly onward to whatever bigger and better place it is they're getting to to appreciate the world in which they already exist.
They walk at two paces: either it's too slowly for anyone else to follow, or too fast to follow behind anyone else in the natural ebb and flow of humanity.
The former remain oblivious.
The latter brush by, passing onto you the rushing that has set into their souls.

You don't know much about a traveling life when you're not boarding a train.
All you know is the information of places and arrival times provided to you in neon lights,
and whatever it is that overcomes your body and being as you see people rush through the gate to their designated platforms.
Some feel an unceasing anxiety.
Others feel an ineffable and unquenchable longing to be transported into the world across the gates.

For the first time in your life,
you realize how truly insignificant you are. For the first time in your life,
you define translucence. For the first time in your life,
you are in a place full of people who do not know you, would not miss you, and, if you made a split-second decision to buy a ticket to the place farthest from home, would not question you if they even noticed in the first place. For the first time in your life,
you are really and truly free;
freer than you've ever been before.
Inspired by energies at Union Station in Washington, D.C.
May 2014 · 572
will I sleep tonight?
Julia Rae Irvine May 2014
have  you ever been afraid to go to sleep?
with nightmares so realistic you wake up with a start.
with  a shock.
subconsciously sitting up,
taking in your surroundings to make sure it was, in fact,
just a nightmare.
just a dream.

but then they haunt  you.
for days on end, it's all your mind can focus on:
whether or not you'll be able to sleep tonight.

you know in your mind
the monsters
the demons
the ghosts
the robbers
the murderers
the rapists
are only figments of an on-edge imagination.
but the knots in your stomach tell you something entirely different.
and so the question lingers still...

will I sleep tonight?
May 2014 · 430
The Reality of Beauty
Julia Rae Irvine May 2014
You say you don't want to be called beautiful,
But look at you.
You are.

Maybe not in a conventional way.
You're not a twig.
Your face is full.
Your cheeks are rosy.
Your hair is like platinum.
Your grey eyes twinkle even in the darkness.

There's nothing ordinary about you.
But ordinary isn't, and never has been beautiful.
And it never will be.

But there is no denying that you are beautiful.
The glow of your smile.
The power of your words.
Your presence on stage.
Your feet as they glide across the floor, even when you're not dancing.

So I will dare to call you beautiful.
Because if you of all people are not beautiful,
Then I will never truly know what beauty is.
For my best friend in the world,
In hopes that one day you will see that you really are beautiful.
Mar 2014 · 792
Julia Rae Irvine Mar 2014
Follow your dreams.
Chase your dream to the ends of the earth.
But chase with caution.
Dreams have a knack for getting in the way.
Of real life.
Of the responsibilities that real life holds.
But don't be too cautious.
For dreams chased are the way to happiness.
And without that,
What else do we have to live for?
Inspired by poet Langston Hughes' "Dream Deferred" and "Dreams."
Mar 2014 · 576
Castle in the Sky
Julia Rae Irvine Mar 2014
Something in my body stirs
As I toss and turn in my bed.
I dream of a castle with my own quarters
And a fair prince who's stuck in my head.

The castle is high above the clouds
In skies so pleasantly blue.
With no toil or care or angry crowds,
And I dream that you'll be there too.

But the dream is fleeting, it leaves me alone
Until once again in those skies I may roam.
We're learning about poetry in English class write now, and we were given an assignment to write a Shakespearean sonnet, so here's my first stab at it.
Feb 2014 · 395
My Rambling Mind
Julia Rae Irvine Feb 2014
What is fear?
Is true love real?
How many times will I let a person hurt me before I give up on them?
Why are you so stupid?!
Why did you love him, he never loved you!
You are a fool.
Rogue of a fool.
"Take back your life!" says the angel on my right shoulder.
"Face it, you're far too weak," says the devil on the left.
"A fat, ugly, wretched bit of garbage; a heavy burden on the world around you."
"No!" the angel cries. "You are strong! Beautiful, compassionate!"
I wish to listen to the angel.
But the figure on the left
Feb 2014 · 382
Untitled I
Julia Rae Irvine Feb 2014
Sometimes I just want to
Feb 2014 · 593
I, A Poet
Julia Rae Irvine Feb 2014
Nothing but a hopeless
Riveter of dreams and of schemes
Needed to get back what has nearly saved my life at times.
Jul 2013 · 1.1k
Julia Rae Irvine Jul 2013
I love fireworks.
They embody the human spirit.
I love them because everyone finds them beautiful.
They're not looked down upon; they're only looked up to.
And though each and every one of them is different, even in the slightest of ways, it doesn't matter.
Their differences don't make them inferior; the make them stand out.
And my favorite part, is this:

Once a firework shoots into the sky, it can't be stopped.

Even though the color fades eventually, that firework has left its mark in the sky forever.
It's eternal.
It never dies.
And even if  you can't see it, **it's still there.
Apr 2013 · 497
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
Apr 2013 · 662
What If...
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
what if I'm lost?
what if I never want to be found?
what if the world turns me away
and never turns me around?

what if I cry like a child
who by the world is denied?
what if I'm too tired to fend for myself
so I always just step aside?

what if the pages of my heart are blank
like a book that's never been read?
what if I sliced and stabbed and cut
until to my death I bled?

what if I stare into my future
and realize I haven't got much?
and what if I'm taken away by a man
who wants me because I'm soft to the touch?

what if I just want to die?
into the depths be thrown?
what if I want to be in the dark,
venture through the black on my own?

there are many what-ifs that one could ask
as the stars draw their fates in the sky.
and there's many a girl who's been out on her own
Apr 2013 · 568
When In All Reality
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
I know not my purpose
I know not why my existence continues
Nor why it ever came to be
Nor why the sun rises in the east
They were wrong-
Not if you're me.
Dreams merely taunt an already troubled mind
Make one think they are worth something
When in all reality,
They could not be worth less.

Rosy cheeks
Broad smile
Chin up
Shoulders thrown back-
All the signs of a girl with it all.
When in all reality,
She is merely a girl with a soul of black
A soul on fire
A soul burning to ash
Black, black ash.

She smiles
She laughs
She puts on an act
She hides her pain
She pretends her mind is sound
That she is only tired
That her emotions aren't eating her alive
That her boldness is real
When in all reality,
Apr 2013 · 740
don't wake me up
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
I want to hide away and cry
But it seems my eyes have both run dry

A bright spot in this haze of black
Would give me nothing but a heart attack

A heart attack might wake me up
But I'd just drink from your poisoned cup

Then I could go back to sleep
And be within the angels' keep

"The angels' keep, or the demons'?" you say
It matters not to me either way

As long as I don't have to wake
And I shall be all yours, for the take
Apr 2013 · 907
more than anything
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
What is it?
Is it a fancy,
Or a feeling?
Is it a thought,
Or an emotion?
Is it selfish,
Or selfless?
Is it always riciprocated,
Or is it always painful?
Is it ever sunshine,
Or is it always fog?
Is it warm,
Or is it cold?
Is it sweet,
Or is it bitter?
Is it even worthwhile in the end?


Me­ntal hospitals.

What do we have without love?
A b s o l u t e l y
N o t h i n g
G o o d
O r
H a p p y.

I ask you again-
L o v e ?
What our world needs now...
A n y t h i n g

We must love.
Apr 2013 · 819
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
another day of exhaustion
after another sleepless night
not knowing where to run
and too mightless to fight.

the world around me seems blacker
than it did yesterday
but with these storms in my mind, thunder, lightning,
the dark is here to stay.

no more reason to live,
no reason to go on
I sit here all alone
waiting for the dawn

when the sun rises,
and when the moon fades
I'll still be here alone
being stabbed with thorns and blades.

once upon a time, life was hopeful,
and I had reason to push through
but now I'm here, all alone,
and all I have is you.

but will you ever realize?
will you ever even care?
will you ever admit it's love?
Would you even dare?

it's true, my answer would be no,
for I am slight and weak.
I would merely zip my mouth
like a bird who'd lost its beak.

but you are strong, you are wise,
you are brilliant and bold.
you- you are my one true love;
my dearest treasured gold

it's true- I love you, I will not lie,
please believe and know.
and if, by chance, you feel the same,
please just tell me so...
Apr 2013 · 584
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
My heart
And soul
Are sure

But my brain
And my stomach
Tell me otherwise

I've fallen
Not bold enough
To believe it
And too afraid
To call it love

And yet
Somehow I know
Some part of me insists
That I should
Let myself feel
And let myself fall

No longer in hiding
No longer in pain
No longer hating
The way I am
Because he is there

Perhaps not

But to hell
With sensibility
Why bother
When you've
Apr 2013 · 1.2k
Julia Rae Irvine Apr 2013
Full of hate
Full of anger
Full of sadness
Full of broken pieces
Of broken parts
Of broken hearts

An ended life
A lifeless body
A bodiless soul

Hanging in the air

Full of blackness
Full of blankness
Full of emptiness


Full of confusion
Full of shame
Full of blame
Full of torture
Full of hurt

Full of regret
Full of fallenness
Full of worry
Full of worthlessness
Full of exhaustion

Full in death

— The End —