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 Apr 2013 J P
JM
One room away is a woman
who wants me to **** her.
She is beautiful, intelligent, and drunk.

I am ugly, intelligent, and sober.

Even though my highest and best
tells me to walk away with a smile,
my core screams for a ruining.

One room away is a drunk, *****,
dripping work of art who is also
very, very lucky.

Charles tells me to listen to
my **** and Pablo whispers a reminder
to remember the smell
of early morning wheat
and your eyelashes
while Walt and I gaze at the stars
and think of death.

I smile to myself,
soaking in the after glow
of vanilla chai, good ****,
and dead poets.

One room away is a woman
who's fate was in my sadistic hands.
Two rooms away is a twelve year old
who is dreaming of flag football
and Vans and getting to
level 37 of Skyrim
and one day,
after he wakes up
and after we have our
toaster strudel,
and somewhere in between
me stopping for coffee
and dropping him off,
I'll remind him
that good ***** is everywhere
so take your time and do it right
and when you just don't want to
look at their face,
make some tea,
catch a buzz,
and read some poetry.
He told me I could search the world over and I would never find anything anywhere quite like him

I'm a Leo  

So I took that as a challenge and headed out on a journey

I returned to his door two and a half years later triumphant

When he opened his door I stated with pride "I did it!"  

"Prove it." he demanded quietly leaning against his door frame, looking, both intrigued and unconvinced.

I took off my back pack, set it on the step, reached in, carefully withdrew a mason jar and passed it to him.

"What's this?" he asked

"You."

"It's an empty mason jar."

"It's not at all empty. It's filled to the brim with all the stuff you're made of."

"Oh? What kind of stuff?"

" Inside that bottle is the magic of a rainbow I found in Greenland, star light I found in the North West Territories, wind from each of the four corners, air that's been caressed by butterfly wings from St. Lucia, sun beams from Samoa, the innocence of a newborn from Uruguay, the passion of a gypsy from Romania, the heat of a thunder bolt from South Carolina, the fragrance of the first bloom of summer from England, the poetic joy of Ireland, and one salty tear of a mermaid from Fiji.  You."  I said again triumphantly

"All that's in here, eh?"

I nodded.

"Well, you must be tired, being right can be exhausting." he said with a grin as he reached out for my hand

"It is and I am." I admitted placing my hand in his

"Would you like to come in?"

" Yes, I would like to come in. I'd like that very much."
 Apr 2013 J P
M
Decisions- A Haiku
 Apr 2013 J P
M
The fact that I can't
Make a decision is a
Decision right there.

I am in limbo
Between two lovely, loving
Beautiful men.

I am completely
Unsure of what my next step
Will guide my heart to.

I am completely
Afraid of taking any
Unsteady steps now,

I am completely
In love with two different people for
Different reasons;

I cannot decide,
I cannot make up my mind too.
I can't continue.

I can't have them both.
I'm in a pit of quicksand
And it's drowning me.

I can't do this to
Two men who deserve better,
Someone decisive.

Neither realize where
I am currently, only
I know where I stand.

I am in between,
Looking left to one, right to
The other and I know

That I have made a
Decision just by looking
At them, here and there.

I am shaking my
Head. I am saying no to
Two astounding men.

I am only a
Young, indecisive, confused
Girl that rips hearts up.

I am losing two
Men that will, in time, come to
Understand this all.

I pick neither for
I love both too much, too much
To be with one man.

I'll break three hearts in
A matter of 3 seconds,
We three have all lost.

I lost the most here
Because I lost sight of how
To love a man well.

I loved the most here
Because I loved two, enough
To let them be free

From me and my issue;
I don't deserve them and
That's easy to see.
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