There are clouds everywhere

The cloud of uncertainty
That fogs my vision so much
that I cannot see the road ahead of me

The clouds of frustration
When the people who I want to understand me
Do not understand and do not try to

The clouds of anger
As they blind my logical reasoning
And my hands make regrets

The clouds of hopelessness
with each passing failure
and each regret that stabs my heart

Finally the cloud of death
waiting for me as I waste my life away
trying to see through all these other clouds

I have seen many stars in my life
some have a special bright light
but **** others brightness with their knife

I have thought them as the perfect star
but I was fooled and my soul was marred

Their brightness was so bright
that it blinded my sight
Blinded it so much I did not see the coming plight

Now I am wiser I know better
to be someone who chases after looks
and forgets that they only know how to be a player
Not warming other people with their light
only to draw them in and **** them with their poisonous bite

Beware of those stars who know nothing but to take
Beware of those stars whose brightness is fake

Beware of the stars who do not love
Who only know to steal the fire of innocent doves

Beware of those stars
for they will deceive you
I beg and hope that you do not to fall in this trap too

As you sailed away
in the big blue sea
I sat by the river
and cried

My tears,
sadness from
the fact that you are gone

pieces of my soul
became part of the river
and I hope that they travel to you
so that you may know

how willing I am to save you from the rough waters
when the river of life meets the storm

or how happy I am, when your river of life
travels to a safe haven of trees
gently flowing, everything going smoothly
sunshine shining through the leaves
...when the river of life has reached a golden time

I send my soul out to the sea
so you may know
how much I loved you
of all the wishes I have for you
but most of all...my plea
for you can come back home,
to me

As scattered ideas come together
As emotions flood my soul
Mountains of papers on the floor
Mountains of words come to mind
But in the end, these mountains form a mountain chain
called a poem

From the car
to walking in the hallways

from waking up before the sun
to going to sleep at night

that same song
playing in my head
on repeat

the song that will be there forever
the song of us

the chords of laughter
the notes of tears
the lines of pain
the lyrics that tell our story


Our instruments now destroyed
we haven't sung for days
the music we enjoyed
all lay in waste

though our vocal chords are severed
our song forever stays
in my head forever
endlessly playing for days

As I am getting ready
for the day you leave

I put my pen on paper
words flowing out of the pen
letters, sentences, paragraphs

the precious words with a piece of my soul
the words that you will never know
how much worth they hold

to you, they may just seem as though
they are empty sentences
even if I poured my heart out
they will mean nothing to you

Rule number one
Don't be too fat, no one will like you
But don't be too skinny because you will seem anorexic

Rule number two
Complete seven hours of homework in one night, and study for 2 tests
But also have a social life so that you will be cool amongst your peers
And also get enough sleep

Rule number three
you need to be there for that person
listening them ranting on about their problems
but do not expect them to care about yours

Rule number four
Have a close friend
Be loyal but do not come off as too clingy
or they will leave you

Rule number five
hold onto your virginity
or else you will be called
a ****, a *****, a player

but do have children in the future
or else you will be called a ******
and you will constantly have the question of why you don't want to be a mother
hanging over your head

These are the double standards that I live with
every day of my life
Seemingly so filled with impossibility
that I'm convinced that I am not good enough