Isn't it amazing?
Me and you, side by side,
hand in hand,
eyes locked to eachother,
hearts beating in one rhythm.
You taught me how to love,
to admire someone greatly.
Taught me how to crave
and miss someone deeply.
You gave me a reason to
give my heart out to, well,
you... but look at us now.
What seemed to be a perfect
life, is now a nightmare.

You shattered my heart into pieces,
having my tears fall from my
face like a shimmering waterfall.
"He's not worth your tears"
That's what I hear constantly;
but you don't understand, they
certainly will never understand the
emotions we have shared together,
emotions I had for you.

A Break-Up
I now understand the meaning
to that very word.
It takes away your mind,
evaporating away those content,
incredible memories.
Nothing matters anymore, no good
will occur; with all these memories
of you surrounding me, I can't
bare to survive like this.
Don't you see that
my heart is bleeding for you,
don't you care?

My hands are constantly trembling,
wanting to hold you once more;
just feeling your flesh on my fingers.
But that won't ever happen again,
I should have seen it from the beginning.
Your perfect self was too good
to be true, I was falling for a lie.
You lied that you cared about me,
that you loved me so much.
I see it now, you're another "guy",
one just out there to play with
our minds, our emotions.
How could you do that to me?

You shot my heart,
and now I'm here trying to
take out the bullet you sinked
in me; the pain it causes
is unbareable, but I'm strong.
I thought you were the one,
the perfect one in my dreams,
wow was I ever wrong.

And here it goes, this is the end,
thank-you for never caring,
for never really loving me.
Thank-you for making me see
the person you really are;
cold-hearted, weak.
I will never be the person
I once was because of you;
this bullet is still *******
into my heart like a tattoo,
beating, living, but still in pain.

Giving someone the chance to
enter your soul and for a
brief moment understand exactly
what you're feeling as well as
what you're experiencing.

Being able to open up to
all the personal drama one encounters,
no matter how easy or hard
it might be, you are in charge.
In charge of your feelings, your life
and what you write down.

It reminds me of those
children diaries which we
all once had, but this time
we are not afraid.
Not afraid to express ourselves
through all the vulnerable words
we write on paper.
Not afraid that someone will
find it and perhaps read it, no
This time it is meant to be read,
meant to be heard and mostly
meant for someone to think about
what is being said.
It is meant to understand what
is being said through the mind,
the eyes, but mostly with
ones heart.

The only way to open up,
with the will of being able
to say the words you might
not be able to say.
Feel the feelings you are
unable to feel.
And hear the responses
you might not want to hear.

Be the voice of many.
Poetry is a diary without a lock.

Wind gushing through my window,
light flickering in the presence
of the walls, and yet a blank mind.

Why is it that nothing comes to me,
even in this most wanting need.
I thrive myself to continue,
where I left off, my passion,
the stages of life through words.

I set my words to demonstrate
stories, love, worries, depression and suffering.
Now, I have a new mission,
to utter my first words to you.
No voice, no body, no expressions or movements,
just words, true words, trying to get you to
know who I am through what makes me glimmer.

No direct conversation, it’s me, this pen and paper,
and well; the stories of you.
Yes, I hear stories, comments
a strong and loving daughter, mother, wife and sister.
My writing is what truly defines my personality,
but don’t get me wrong, we will meet.

The world, is full of surprises
if we’re ready or not,
it still hits us hard or smooth.
It is why we were placed here, to
overcome every surprise we encounter;
keeping our loved ones closer when times
are tough, even when yet so far away.

But that’s not what I learned,
we were formed to this life, this century
to live it in good will.

What is a good life?

That’s something you have to
tell yourself. But, I’m not
only here showing you that
I’m someone who understands and
cares – I know how it feels to
be scared and worried.
Philosophy can also do that
to you.

Yet, no, I’m here to show you who
I am, who I became to be
because of, your brother and my past.
I share to you, my thoughts
of the bad times and good.

There are people surrounding you,
many contains, nothing tangible,
but gushing in that very wind through
that cold window.
I’m here, in laughter, sadness,
hope, and anxiety.
Anxious to meet you, to crack smiles,
living that good life
with no regrets, no worries.

Free verse, poetry, I
heard you’re not a fan.
Let’s change that, as corny
as it might feel to read
and engage in thought, you
may realize many things through
each poem written.
It invites you to an open
diary, invites you to enter
opening your mind and understanding
each verse, each word being placed.
I welcome you to my world,
the true life of a poet.

Don't leave me love, not now, not ever,
not here in this empty space on this bed.
Not even when watching the sunset in a
cold, misty raining night.

Don't have the silhouette of your precious body
dissolve as I open my eyes.
Or let your shadow leave me
in this dark and bitter alleyway.

I feel you breathing on my face,
but I know it's just my imagination.
For one time love, I plead, don't leave me,
stay,
lay next to me watching the stars
and moon sparkle above us.

My dearest, hold my hand as we walk
through all obstacles and adventures
this scary, torturing life has to offer.

You are my truth, revealing the
insanity of my soul and the beating
of my heart I give to you.

Don't leave me love, not now, not ever.

Isn't it time,
to stand up for what's right.
Do the right thing.
and for once defend myself?
Am I just going to sit here,
listening to the screaming,
the swearing, the nonsense
coming from the other room?
A closed door, I sit here,
a pillow on my face, crying for
a different life.

I lost myself,
How could I do it again,
No one will ever love her like I do,
But the fear in her eyes…
I am sick,
But when I say I’m sorry and she forgives me.
Maybe it’s alright.
It’s just when I’m drunk,
I’ll stop this time.

Could I forgive him once more?
Am I able to call a drunk my soulmate?
My heart breaks everytime I undress myself.
A scar here, a bruise there, a love... gone?
Can't he see his drinking is
tearing us apart, and above all,
abusing my heart in all ways.
I'm scared.
Scared to look into his eyes.
Frightened to argue with him.
What should I do?

I see her pain,
That’s what makes me drink,
It’s what makes me angry,
I cause this me,
There is no one else to blame,
Except when I’m woozy,
Then it’s her,
It’s the woman’s fault were poor,
That I’m forced to spend all my money on alcohol,
Why she’s bruised? Better than she deserves.
I just… hope I don’t go too far.

If only my current regret,
was something different, to be able to confront.
A regret of him, or a regret of his drinking.
How can I make this relationship work?
When talking leads to screaming,
pouring leads to punching, and
an 'I'm sorry' means nothing at all.
I forgive him, for maybe a change of heart.
Maybe if he sees my wounded soul,
he'll change.
It'll be a dream come true.

When no ones there,
And I’m all alone.
I cry myself to sleep,
In my pathetic little existence,
I am king,
But at who’s expense,
The tax payer is me.
Even if she’s got the money.

Do I make him happy?
He's miserable everyday.
I do everything for him, I even allow myself
to be his very own punchbag.
At what cost?
For his beloved love, that's all I want.
But, if he's not going to provide,
I just have to stand up for myself.
Put in a good word, maybe then,
he'll treat me better.

I can hear her thoughts now.
She’s plotting against me.
The she devil, she’s always against me!
I can’t stand her presence,
It’s foul to the cell,
But I cant be without her either.
When I see her tears,
Even though I know it’s a façade,
I think angel and love and desire above.
Still a conspiracy is a conspiracy,
And its time for me, to do what I do.

No, my mind is going crazy for him.
I must stop, must stop him now.
I'm allowing him to spit on me.
Such shame brought to my name.
I must be crazy, to think that he will change.
He hasn't all this time, and never will.
It's said and done.
This must be a past.
My heart and body needs healing.
But I mustn't see him, I have to leave.
For his eyes drags me to his spell.
I can't take this much longer.

And then it was a dark and dreary day,
When I was fired once again,
Being a drunkard they said,
Well F them.
I came home shaggy, tired and distraught,
These bills just weren’t going to get done.
Life was over anywhere.
But, there was that good old reliable beer,
And I had one, and then more.
When she came home from her mothers,
The house was dark and quiet.
She never knew what hit her,
Thought you wouldn’t have know by her screams and tears.
The blood was the worst,
It got everywhere.

Why are you crawling back?

We were once together,
once a very happy couple,
sharing in laughter, sadness and anger.
You destroyed that saying
that it's just not working out;
making me feel alone, depressed, shattered.

All the memories of you stayed
in my mind for a while,
you surely don't understand.
It was once a goodbye e-mail from you,
and you were out of my life, for good.

Maybe that was for the best?
You didn't deserve me, and
I didn't deserve you, period.
Right?

One year later, when I have finally
forgotten about you,
forgotten about us, our memories;
here you are, on my computer screen,
flashing an orange light, the blinking
making it hard to ignore - wanting to see what you typed.

'Ola'

One year later, and you want to say
hello to me? Are you trying to torture me?
Putting my heart in more pain from when you left.

'I feel bad, ' that's what you replied,
reminding you about what you have done.

Bad? you have no idea.
Why are you coming back to me?
Are you trying to make me remember you?
Remember when we were together?
Hard to admit but it's happening,
the past memories are coming clearer
everytime you say,
'Remember when..'
I do remember, my heart aches everytime.

Mind spinning,
but i can't help but smile.
They were great times, really,
but why are you telling me this now?
When life happens to be
fitting into place, you come crawling back.

You just won't dissappear for good, won't you?
But, why;
why are you messing with
my head, my heart, and my emotions.

Why are you crawling back?

Birds singing to one another,
wind gushing through the wilderness,
sun shining upon us
and life getting miserable each day.

Through all the beauty life has encountered,
we yet, have still closed our minds and hearts
to the ones we love, the ones we hate
and mostly, to the world; making life horrible.
We are one being, with millions of emotions

Ever been through times, when nothing seems right?
Times when you feel like your mind and heart
has just been shattered in pieces,
wondering what the reason might be.

I have, for quite sometime
and still have I not yet figured out
the reason as to why
I'm stuck in this other world
constantly abusing myself in ways that don't
make any sense.

My mind is one of its own nature
it drifts off and imagines many
messed up ****, through love,
freedom, lost, death and heartbreaks.

Possibly this whole reason is to
erase that from my mind,
doing something I gained to enjoy
and facing with the consequences.

Maybe its the thought of liking someone
yet, too scared to believe in it;
or maybe it's all the pressure
I put onto myself
and realizing that my presence
won't be useful to
learn, grow, adapt and love.

I hate bottling everything in me,
I hate feeling every emotion at once,
I hate how I have so many incredible
people in my life,
I hate these struggles,
these certain random heart pains I
have to adjust.

I've learned that my life has
two worlds, two 'types' of people
and one body.