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Joy Ceye Jun 2017
A fire in a West London
Tragedy that left people still wondering
Missing and Wishing
That some might be alive
Shouting but no living soul could help
In that battle for life
Which is now a constant thought
Buildings looking like lost souls
A cause of which we still don't know.

A fire raging like an angry alien
While we crave answers
To a crew arriving but was it on time?

Started on the second floor and within
Seconds before anyone saw
It was at the top
Though clocks were ticking
Tick Tock Heart Knocks
Constant panic filling the air
And deadly smoke
Horrible deaths
Uncertainty
Filled up with uncontrollable pain.

Faces seen at burning windows
Ghostly looks haunting
Scenes of death took over
And they knew their life was going
To end
With a scream and a cry
And trauma
As fire engines arrived
But hope slowly slipped away
With no escape in sight.

Struggling to be free from the trap
From sadness and fears
That caused all these tears!

News is on now
But do they know or have real answers?
The information is still not clear
Just imagine the fear
If this could happen to anyone
Mistakes happen but how would
You feel
If this could  happen to you?

Community spirit is trying to help
Supporting through food
Giving all they can
Clothes flowing in like a mad river
To the lucky
Survivors
Homeless
Desperate.

How can we fix this issue?
Start over
Forget memories that were burnt
To shreds
Sleep in a house that is not
Your home
Pray for answers but
When you get the reply
Grief fills you like an ambition
Your final bit of hope lies crumbling.

The mumbles of people
Around and surrounding you
Makes it new news
So don't stop
Find a way out
Can I help
The exit?
A poem written by my 12 year old student. Inspiring. Just shows how some young people care.
15
Joy Ceye Mar 2017
15
one time and times three makes you
fifteen a daughter
please smile you don't know I do
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
9
Cards
Nine
From A
Deck
To
Free ME.
Close to my heart and experimenting with this one.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
It's good for the soul and mind she said
Talk to me, dance with me, leave your bed.
It's good for the body and heart she said
Move with me, write with me, leave it dead
It's good to hear words and thoughts I said
Share with me, be with me, stay in my head.
It's good to have a good friend I then said
Plan with me, map with me, give me a thread.
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
There is green in you.

It is not the colour of fresh cut grass,
that can be cut quite short and
left to grow back and last.

It is not the colour of a bay
tree
with a Jasmine plant winding her
blossoms and flowers quite free.

It is not the colour of a pond full of frogs,
innocents of nature returning here
every year without a watchdog.

It is the colour of slime, toads and envy
of weeds that grow far too tall.
of you not wanting me to be free.

It is the colour of a promise always
rotten
and the next phone call swearing
you'll be here have not forgotten.

It is the colour of you my dearest
friend,
so it has to be over now and
from today the green must end.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
On a dark winters night full with courage and wine,
He came.
Not on horseback in armour with an invitation to dine,
He followed.
Climbed up to the balcony and that was the swine,
He sneaked.
Could not recite fairytales, poems or lines.
He failed.

No Juliet
Waiting to hear how fair she was with eyes that did shine.
No Rapunzel
Letting down hair to form a long stair in a casscade of rope and vine.  
No Esmeralda
Seducing a man with a dance to time, a motion and rhyme.
No Green Knight
Holding flowers or symbols of any love sign.


You didn't pass the challenge this time
Come back next year
With a trophy or a token or a musical chime.
No longer the Green Knight,
Then I'll never have to use this axe of mine.
Bit of a work in progress.
Joy Ceye May 2017
A scent wafts in today
and I start making my own goals
in the wrong direction,
fingers clogged with dirt
nails raw
clawing with that uttermost splurt
that sends my head spinning
with no reflection.

Or maybe it's because it's May
and in-between my ***-holes
the wind is a distraction
minds filled with hurt
heart sore
feeling with that need to blurt
that sends my soul winning
with no detection.
Joy Ceye Sep 2017
Hello there?
Hi to you.
Tell me now -things that you do?
Of course I will - I don't know you!

You have a ruler, a cane, a whip?
Most of the time it's Biff and Chip!
Dress in skirt and blouse so tight?
That's what keeps me up at night!

No-one there?
Goodbye to you!
Why not ask about the things I do?
Of course I won't - it's not true!

You have cash, a car and no snip?
Most of the time you are the drip!
Wear your heart upon your sleeve?
It's what I call I liar - oh please!
Random thought
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
You did not need to be anyone at all
biological, but safe and warm or
just to put your arms around a child
to heal that pain.

You did not need that cord to be cut
umbilical, but only think and
just to have the feeling that she won't
open the wound again.

You did not need a child: lost and found
miracle, but to hear the voice or
just to witness screaming and dreaming
in vain in vain in vein.

You did have a child that was quite
illogical, but you never come here to
just a life without reasoning
with no pressure no stain.
Joy Ceye Jul 2017
'Can I come up today?' gasped the innocent guy,
'My bus ticket's lost and do you know why?
The way on this road is so steep and uphill
And certain things stop me and give me that thrill'

'Yes, yes, yes, keep on climbing' said  I
'If you make it up here then I will not try
To keep you enclosed in my black, dark den
Let nothing detain you and arrive not past ten'

'Are you tired my dear?  I echoed out loud,
'Take off those shoes and don't be so proud
Rest on my bed and take a little time
My curtains are blowing, my sheets are just fine'

'No, no, no, just resting'  he vowed
'Need to get away from the voice and the crowd
And put my hands on a full pair of *******
So I'm staggering up here to forget all the rest'

'Dearest friend, now what shall I do?'
I have you here and the bus ticket too!
A party parcel, a knife and a slice
Cut it in pieces and it feels quite nice.
Joy Ceye May 2017
A tongue
Used for exploring
Mmmm!
Everywhere I've been.


A tongue used for licking
Mmmm!
Soft swirls of cream.

A tongue used for circling
Mmmm!
Parameters so extreme.

A tongue used for flicking
Mmmm!
Pebbles in a stream.

A tongue used for speaking
Mmmm!
On a particular theme.

A tongue used for shrieking
Mmmm!
Fantasies in my dream.

A tongue
Your tongue
My tongue
All tongue
          Oh My God...... Words
                                                    Just
Come!
Thinking why we have tongues if we are not allowed to speak?
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Single
Or in a bundle
Either way
I think I have been
Selling myself
Too Cheap.
The hammer starts it
0
Following
Words.
Start the bidding
It could be
Priceless.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Do you hide it
And pretend you are 'normal'
When the world around you
Is Insane?

Do you tell it
And pretend you are a 'total'
When they use it against you
To their gain?

Do you write it
And let the words flow and 'blow'
Upon empty ears
Is it the same?

Do you you give up,
And let them 'break' your nose, blood
In a corner
For their gain?

Or do you?
Why would you?
Why should you?
How could you?
A friend?

Autistic
Artistic
A statistic?
Trying to connect.
Something close to me.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
2 day
My 3
Arrive at yours at 11
To number 35?
There was no light,
10 houses up I'm told
45.

2 stay
My 3
Park up outside at 11
To number 45?
That was quite right,
3 numbers up I'm told
48.

1 say
My 3
Press the white bell at 11
To number 48?  
There was no fight,
2 streets left I'm told
50.

1 play
My 3
Call kids home at 11
To number 50?
We have no might,
1 Father left I'm told
0.

2 day
My 3
Child is gone at 11
Daughter at 0?
So we must write,
A Mother left I'm told
100.
Playing with numbers
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
I don't play ping pong
green with no surface
to bat it back and forth
over a net that I cannot find.
I don't play those games
life with no strings
to say it back and force
white lies and
anonymous things.
I like juggling
*****
so have the decency
to say one day they might
be yours!
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Mostly you stay silent
Listening
Hollow
Fast.

Sometimes you stay dormant
Waiting
Shallow
Caste.

Often you stay violent
Waving
Arrow
Past.

One day it's my moment
Smiling
Swallow
Last.
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
Miss
You
Are the one I needed to see to
Today because I have to
Say
Goodbye
But hopefully not forever.
When I came here I was below in
English
Confidence
Self-esteem and there was no way
I could imagine I would ever
Sit
Learn
In a classroom that echoed for me a
Violence
Hatred
Of words and symbols I could not understand
Because I was 'different'.
Five
Years
Has taken me to the point of success
And I want you to know that
All
Everything
I have become and will be is
Because of you.
Note from a student who has left me today, so turned it into a poem. It's exactly why I teach x
Joy Ceye May 2017
No longer in black
or funeral colours
of grief but
today it was
shades of blue
dresses in other
shapes
with skirts
that could lead me
into a twirl
and make me ditch
denim trousers
because I'm still
a girl!
Shopping
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
We were perfect finding a way to grow straight
following a sunrise
that helped our roots to grow
and lie within
flowers, fruit, feasts.

You were perfect winding a way to make us sway
blowing cold ice
as we started to bud; attract bees
leaning to one side so it could not
become a beast.

It could be perfect blowing air
in precious time
unwinding lost seconds
as alarm bells sound silence,
fallen faces in leaves; trees
unleashed!
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
she usually lets it sit in curls quite
natural,
with no warmth or heat that is so
unnatural,
but he says he will arrive on his feet
contractual,
she straightens and tidy's away the
factual,
and puts things in cupboards to hide
supernatural,
he comes and he goes not noticing the
actual,
woman he came to see is in chaos
collateral.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
A bag full of jackets
When I first met you
All for charity
But that wasn't true.

Legs spread out
So I couldn't get through
I wouldn't have looked
At a man like you.

I gave you my number
You gave me yours too
You sent me a message
The first of a few.

You fell on hard times
Needed a chance to be new
I gave you that chance
Because that's what I do.

A room was then painted
Green stripes and blue
I gave you my keys
You kept them too.

My money was gone
My daughter too
How I wish
I'd never met you.

So Charity now
Begins with a few
Holding on tight
And starting anew.
A work in progress but if I don't write it down now I never will. I'll change it lots but the idea is there.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
I cannot embrace the newness of you or smell the white powder that lingered here- for days and weeks and years and forever - it's here.
Plucking you from fresh grass - blowing and watching you fly away - a spore in the wind.
Never making time to wish or hope or dream.
I cannot let myself remember how you touched the silk - looking into your black eyes I saw a sun, a moon, a planet - my world.
I cannot open my door my friend.
I cannot move or listen.
I do not hear or see or feel.
I cannot wait and hear
The other ones cries.
Joy Ceye May 2017
Take a chill pill
Relax
Sit slack
Have a crack
It's not real.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN
IT'S TOTALLY OBSCENE
THAT I'M NOT ALLOWED
TO BE ON THE SCENE?

Take my chill pill
Adapt
Hit back
Have a knack
It's surreal!
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
There once was a girl from the city
Who in her youth was quite pretty
But she decided to write
Stayed up every night
Looking for something quite gritty.
Joy Ceye May 2017
Those four red lines
do not represent any journey
we have had
or will.
I am not climbing
your ladder of
hurt and
self loathing.
The compass you used
will take us in a new direction
of red sands
and deserts.
Let that be your guide
and do not dig that
needle in again unless
it's to pinpoint our travels.
For my daughter x
Joy Ceye May 2017
Blunt
Smart
Razor
Sharp
Is my tongue.
Stick yours right there
One day
Words
Might
Come!
:-)?
Joy Ceye May 2017
Put on your dress he says
A dinner, date, rare steak
No!

Wear those heels he says
A tango, salsa, quick step
Slow!

Show me that silk he says
A clip, photo, one take
Go!

Open your door he says
A knock, bang, hard touch
Low!

Busy with work he says
A silence, blank, upset
Blow!
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
there is never an escape
from the domestic
VIOLENCE
a promise
100%
DIVORCE
from shadows
on arms, legs,
FACE
truth is often silent
0
understand or listen
and I'm waiting
1 year or 2
nasty I am
triple faced liar
TEACHER
of lessons
I don't want to share
with my child
I could be a
JOKE
broken
big bully
cheeky
or just me?
you just didn't see
or believe in me
call the police
and
speak to the
MOTHER
in me!
Notes on divorce
Joy Ceye May 2017
Today our hands touched in dust;
white flour mixed
warm
in
water
while we waited for this dough to rise;
red pepper chopped
spinach
my
daughter
has chosen and decides to just trust;
one hour fixed
torn
but
we ought to
make a life of happiness and smiles;
a life not stopped
minutes
but
I taught her
to blow away the dust.
Joy Ceye May 2017
Good evening
And welcome to
The blame game.

Tonight we will lay it
At the door
Of the most vulnerable
In our midst.

Tonight it's the turn
Of the poor
It's the poor
(Undeserving of course)
Will be kissed.

Yes. Tonight's Star Prize
One not to be missed
A leech's
Kiss.
# Brian Herdman fabulous poet xxxx
Joy Ceye Mar 2017
Called  you so many times I
Black and Blue you laugh
999 I'm in the bath.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Two beds making an L shape.
The shape we'd made.
The LOVE of you.
Two rugs making a V shape.
The shape we'd made
The VISION of you.
Two covers making a C Shape.
The shape we'd made.
The CLOSENESS of you.

One window making an F space.
The shape you've made.
The FREENESS of you.
One sky making a B shape.
The shape you've made.
The BEAUTY of you.
One heaven making an A shape.
The shape you've made.
The ANGEL of you.

No thoughts making an E space.
The shape I've made.
The ENERGY of you.
No mirrors making a G space.
The shape I've made.
The GHOST of you.
No dreams making an M space.
The shape I've made.
The MEMORY of you.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
I have written a lot of things
but it's nowhere near to everything
that I could once do
because of you
I stopped
starting something new
because I didn't believe in anything
but it's not now me that's perishing
and thoughts become few
a conclusion I drew
I swapped.
Joy Ceye Oct 2017
I like doing the Maths with you
Our one plus one
Adding some
Making three
Our minds free.

I like hearing the voice in you
My one minus none
Needing no-one
Breaking free
We are three.

I like being myself in you
Feeling words come
I am someone
Being ME
Can it be

You understand
My equations
My sensations
My dilations
My inhabitations

Can you
Should you
Would you
Make My X
Equal Y

You gonna try
To be the same
Or play a game
Or just apply
The equation.
Experiment - it's more a song
Fly
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Fly
I wonder what might be going on in your tiny mind
little black fly as you land in a glass of chilled white wine?
Do I let you drown in a Yellow Sea or rescue you and set you free
to enjoy the intoxication
as you try to fly away?
Or will I use my finger to push you deeper and squeeze
the life out of you
why?
death could be sweeter.
Summer flies
Joy Ceye Aug 2017
My grandfather kept everything
but I remember the egg
upon his shelf
that we gave him
and it sat for years
in his gold shell
never loosing shape on the outside
just sometimes
the glasses
nose
and smile
might shift
if you looked in a certain light
or from a different angle
but it sat looking at him
as his insides decayed
still oval, whole
slightly faded
until
he
went
and I unwrapped his foil
only to find
dust.
Joy Ceye May 2017
Do we
Live in a world that we didn't even choose
Utopia, Dysphoria, War Zone?
Or stay
Safe in a place that is nestled within a womb
Placenta, Myopia, Safe Home?
Or should we
Stay in a county with possesions we own
Dictator, Fabricator, Planes drone?
Can't speak
A language that was created by us unknown
Metaphorical, Native, Foul tongue?
Is there
A Universe that we by chance could exist
Uninvited, Alien, Pesty Guest?
Or would
A world of full of boundaries let me find
A Nation, Peace, Permanent home?
Work in progress - have more to say but not here -  about children and immigration. .
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
What would I find if I broke down your wall?
Taking it down brick by brick.
If I looked inside I would find nothing at all?
Yes you would you stupid *****!

What would I find if you broke down my wall?
Moving it round trick by trick.
If you looked inside would you see it or call?
No you wouldn't you make me sick!

Why do I find that I like my closed wall?
Hiding its sound tick by tick.
If you're living inside then how can you fall?
The coffin is ready better be quick!
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
De de de de, de de de de,
De de de de, de de de de de.
Run for your ices, lollies and cones,
for a sound that is cold and
sends chills through my bones,
how can a person
be left so sad and alone
feeling frozen in time?
Ice- Cream Man!
You lie!
De de de de, de de de de,
De de de de, de de de de die.
No offence to ice-cream or men or anyone who sells them.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Bit bored and lonely
so I could go out and meet
Jack
in the green.
Paint colours on my face
and wave a white scarf
Jack
in between.
Could listen to music
that vibrates within my soul
Jack
you have seen.
But stay home only
not to start a parade of mine
Jack
I have been.
Joy Ceye Jul 2017
flames with pulses
throbbing with desire
certain impulses
lighting up a fire

tinder and match
casting plenty of fish
drowning catch
seas of loneliness

false hope there lies
feelings so blue
masks of disguise
until I found you
First thoughts on joining a dating website.
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
Today I was given a lucky charm
Or defensive hanger to protect me
Against the flea bitten of spirit.
A talisman to conquer that elusive love
Against hybrids of tails and coins
Against hybrids of toads and butterflies.

Oh Lucky Charm defend me from
Those who make work more complicated than it is with
All kinds of *******.
Protect me against cars and their drivers
And those who make me afraid with their fear.

Give me luck so that I can put up a shield against
Those so twisted that they bite their tale with
Intentions I do not need to discover.
The two faces in one
And those who despise poetry and art.

I hope that by hanging onto you I will
Fight against those who want more from me
And find those that seek love.
Safe from those that make us afraid with fear
Wrap promises in warm true fingers
Not wearing gloves instead of hands.
Notes on a special gift.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
She painted a disguise full of colour
grey, green, pink and red.
A mask of flesh to cover
thoughts, bruises, dreams in her bed.  
She laid it carefully on paper
buff
no black text on white
blurry
images
mixing with her head.

It took time to mix and caste
ideas, thoughts, rhymes and tears.
A shield to confront her innermost
magic, demons and heart of fears.
She wrote with a pen on the
left
the left that is left and not your right
early
pictures
where she treads more near.
Writing about my dyslexia
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
Clocks ticking
Calling time
Bombs
Ready
To
E
   X
       P
            L
O   D  E.
Joy Ceye May 2017
she envelopes my
sky 
in grey
hiding sunsets
and  
silhouettes
she hides those fingers
but
I can still see
her single eye
following  me
and when she comes it is quick
hardly noticed
 her fingers an invisible touch
to take
a reaching
grasp at clouds
white smoke
leading to her powder path
to
hold
and
be lost in a
mist.
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
I knew
so had to come out and look
and it explains everything
Waning Gibbous!
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
I hear the calling
But cannot put into
Words the emotions
Of trying to find a lost love
Only understanding the sound
That no-one will ever comprehend
Like
Who
You
Or
What are you looking for?
A fox
A Seagull
A child
To ******
Crying from a dark street
On rooftops, in gardens?
Hoping for friends you will meet
In a world only you recognise.
And I hear your cry is lost
Missing and gone now
Because
No-one grasps it.
Joy Ceye Mar 2018
Rattle along to our own sound
You and I
Unleashing brains
Still wrapped in chains
Avoiding the rain
And smoky grounds
That are
Getting us high.

Cheeseburger exchanged for one pound
He and I
Describing pains
Down country lanes
Avoiding the train
And busy Towns
Who are
Making us cry.

Guitar strings so loud we are drowned
You and I
Cutting veins
No one who gains
Avoiding the sane
And white gowns
They are
Keeping us dry.
Joy Ceye Apr 2017
WASP
SPIDER
LADYBIRD
A FLY

HUNGRY
PIZZA
STUFFED CRUST
WHY?

WASH
COVERS
PILLOWS
ONE SHEET

OPEN
PASSAGE
FRIENDS TO
MEET?

HOPE
ONE DAY
YOU'LL BE
FINE.

KEEP
HANGING
YOUR NOTES
ONTO MINE.
This is for my daughter who leaves notes all around the house for jobs I need to do and never actually speaks to me about it.
Joy Ceye Jun 2017
Thunder roars
lightning strikes
rain lashes down
upon exits.
Who would want to
wake up to
clouds that hide
blue skies.
Our streets
will either wave happy
banners of red
or be filled with blood.
We tried but the
blind can never foresee
the foreshadowing of
our own doom.
I'd love this to be wrong :-)
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