Roses are red
Violets are blue
You hurt me baby
But I still love you

You look in my eyes
Search for my soul
You don't look deep
So you let go

What do I do
How can I make you see
I look back at you
But you can't see through me

I know you will leave
If not now then soon
I just want you to see
Who we could be

Never mind
Maybe it's not meant to be
I am done
It's always just me

The one's I loved
The one's I needed
Their all gone
Away from my sight they had to go
I wonder if they even know
Did they see the pain
The mask that I put on
Did they know the hurt
Or where they always gone
I wanted to wake up
Seeing the jail again
It felt like a dream
Nothing could help me
Nothing could send my pain away
I had fallen astray
The will of God was not there
I made myself go numb
Never wanted to feel
I was almost gone
When I finally made myself kneal
The sight of God will be glorious
Until the day I see his face
The pain I let hurt me deep inside
I can never erase

I have staied up on sleepless nights
Not even thinking of all the sights
Only of the things that hurt
While wiping my eyes with a shirt
The pain is unreal
I go numb at the thought that it might not heal
I sneak from place to place
I cry at every face
The pain will not be leaving
I keep on heaving
I can't breath
I can't see
It's going dark
Now it's black
Where did you go
I want to come back

My life is like a rug
I pile everything on
I hide my secrets on the bottom
Hoping no one will see
All of my insecurities
I don't want them to know
The only things that love me
I am afraid that when they find these things that I hold so deep
They will use them against me
Sometimes the weight is so heavy
Sometimes it is light
When I don't know what to do
I turn to fight
My fist won't help me
There's nothing that I can do
They know my secrets now
How do I get through
I hate relying on others
It is when I am weakest
They tell me it's ok
They say it will get better
They pull and tug on this rug
Just to get a reaction
I lose my balance just for a split second
Now this person has control of where my rug goes
And I am the only one who cares or knows
I know that if they pull the rug to hard
My world will fall and crumble apart

Nine years old
Not yet a teen
Not quite independent
I couldn't stop the noises
I couldn't help the pain
Why can't I disappear
Why can't I leave
I need to breakout

All grown up
New family
New friends
New everything
The noises are still there, with diffeerent people
The pain won't stop for anything
I'm still in fear
I'm still crying
Down on the floor
Knealed by the bed
Begging God

Why don't things ever change
No matter where I go
In my teens now, yet still a helpless nine year old

Mom, why did you bring me to this earth
You had to know that I'd get hurt
Can you see the pain I'm in
Feel the pain I feel
Feel it deep wihin
I know you taught me to brush me teeth
You helped me learn my ABC's
You kissed my elbowhen I fell
You made me smile when I wasn't feeling well
We've gone through alot in this life
Been places we never wanted to be
No matter how hard life got
I thought you would stand beside me
Since you are gone now
I need your help
I want you to show me how to love
Teach me how to care
Tell me life gets better
When my life dosen't go some where
Give me back my smile
Take my tears away
Help me embrase my life
Take it on, grab it by the horns
Show me where to turn
Help me to avoid the hurt
This is all I want mom
A chance to live to the fullest
Show me how to do this
Point me out the way
Let me live my life, day by day
I'm sick of crying
There's no one to wipe my tears
I'm sick of being me
I have to many fears
Help me mom
Get me through this
I know you can
Try your hardest
Do it for me
... your daughter

Where am I going to end up
My future is decided
Mom or Dad

My dreams don'tmattter
A drunk
A rejector of family
I have to choose

Why try
A town ***
A **** up hyprocryite
I have to choose

I can follow
Fly with God
Sink to the devil
I have to choose

I can live
Love and rejoice
Serve and pray
I choose you lord