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Joshua Helmuth Jan 2013
I can talk
Can you?
I can relate
Can you?
I feel
Do you?
I live
Do you?
I am unique
Are you?
I am real
Are you?
I am a Person
What Are You?
Joshua Helmuth Nov 2012
This is my mountain
My greatest challenge
Although I began strong
I found I can't finish what I start
Now lying at the bottom
I can see all the mistakes
All the missteps, the faults, and the cracks
That caused this avalanche
Every inch I get closer, every step
It's a new chance for failure
The peak is hidden
With the mist and clouded judgement
So how close am I?
There it is again
That familiar rumble of demise
What started as a pebble
Became my downfall
Falling down
Getting lower
And lower
Until
I
Hit
Bottom
Crushed by the snow
My fears and regrets
Frozen
Numb
Lifeless
Now what?
I dig my my way out
But Why?
It's only going to happen again
Like so many other times
The fine powder so heavy
The face so steep
Yet I persist
I have to finish
I'll go down fighting
This internal War is getting to be too much
Higher and Higher I ascend but it's always the same
I continue to be knocked off, far from finishing, but it's not enough
I have to reach my goal
These obstacles only motivate me
But I can't overcome them if I can't amount to them
So here it comes again
That agonizing rumble
The crushing weight
Slowly crushing my hope
I give up
Joshua Helmuth Nov 2012
I was put here because they are afraid
But of what?
The Truth? Meaning? Reality?
I too lock myself away, only getting light through cracks
Who takes it in?
No one
Am I just a face with a name?
I don't belong here, in this living (s)hell
But my world is too comfortable to leave
It's bittersweet
I've given so much help but where is mine?
Because a drop this far can ****
Blinded by the bright sun
Where is the rain when I need it?
Joshua Helmuth Nov 2012
It's so cold
I've gone completely numb
My body aches
My bones and spirits broken
This is not where I want to be
I breathe the dust of my doubt
Suffocating
In vain, I cry
No one will here me
No one really cares.
They say there's a light at the end
But the tunnel collapsed
There is no end
So I guess this is mine
Joshua Helmuth Oct 2012
Forgotten, abandoned
Lost with time
How the people need him
Now more than ever
They hope, they sacrifice
And dream of better days
They cry out for their Hero
Who is never to return
But why, oh why have they been forsaken?
Why must they suffer so?
The land he once belonged to
Scorched by hate from the flames of evil
His weapon sheathed
His armor destroyed
The Hero is lost
With no way to go back
He is gone, never to be seen again
Bound to the corner where he stands
A single tear falls
*I'm sorry
Joshua Helmuth Sep 2012
The deep blue sky grays
Clouds sweep over the sun
The wind breathes and the air is chilled

drip

Trees bend and sway
The day was still young
But, clouded, the horizon has been filled

Rumble

Feel the heavens roar
The ground drinks deep
The sky breaks as the lightning dances

CRACK

The rains pour
As lightning goes to sleep
A familiar light shines as the passing storm advances

*shh
Joshua Helmuth May 2012
What I love
Is what everyone hates
What brings me joy
Siphons it from others
The Music
The Hobbies
The Weather
Irrelevant
You don't care
None of it matters
The impenetrable social bubble
Destroyed by one person
You untouchable, immortal
Yet fragile Benevolence
My growing smile is proof
There is still hope
Against all odds
A blessing
A remedy for a bleeding soul
For a broken world
Perfection
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