Josef Wilhelm

Josef Wilhelm Oct 2012

These hands.
These rough and eager hands.
They've hurt enough.
They've done enough.
Its about time to cut them off.
These hands.
These old and rusty hands.
Have compiled a list of duties.
And helped thousands of people.
Those eyes.
Those cold and dusty eyes.
They see right through me
and reveal this empty person.
How honest can you be?
I don't really know,
And I don't truly care.
But there is something
you should know.
Its that I don't feel
or give a ****.
Beware.

Josef Wilhelm Oct 2012

Changes In Perspective

I can remember
that there was a time
when I was young
and nothing was real.
Nothing made sense.
Everything was happy,
yet so complex.
So many...
Discoveries.

I've forgotten all these things.
Like an old, damaged film.
Dusty and grainy.
I envision the emotions
The excitement and confusion
Frustration, and discovery
Aromas and sounds of the ocean.
Allergies...

I feel as though,
that I can't remember.
More than I should.
More than I would.
If things had been normal.
I would have felt less.
Maybe remembered more.
More than before.

Bitter-sweet things come,
and are rough around the edges
of the corners of my room.
At this crazy moment
I suddenly realize
the true and healthy path.
The old doesn't matter.
The past is what it is.
And the truth really is,
the meaning is long lost.

I'll tear my sleeves right off my shirt
and shed my fears and loneliness.
My secret trail...
is in my own back yard.
Sacred and peaceful.
Thick and scarred.
A giant padlocked door.
But it's okay,
that's just the way it is.
I will stand strong.
Anything else is just surface rust,
but not enough to fail.
Not enough to sway.

Josef Wilhelm Jul 2012

Pinless Grenade

Why can't you just leave me alone?
These never ending dreams.
These unexplained moments.
Haunting me.
Delicate minds cannot even comprehend.
Life poured glue all over me
And left me out to dry.
Hardened and refined.
Some days its as if containing
My every emotion could end up
In an explosion.
An impulsive grenade.
Born without a pin to pull.
I am my own pin.
I may scream but no one hears me.
I may cry but no one notices.
Who would care anyways?
Why do I lie to myself?
Simple. Its easier.
Someone who loves so much
Must mean magical things are happening.
But how come it takes so long to notice?
How come my wings cannot take me
Where I need to go.
I'll climb back into my cacoon.
My chamber .
When I regain consciousness
I'll be brand new.
Ready for the world.

Josef Wilhelm Jul 2012

Listen

If only you could truly hear me
and see me for who I really am.
Instead of seeing me transparent
when only the things that
are apparent are visible.
If only you could hear my voice
that bounces in your head.
With a soothing melody of greatness.
With lasting words that might help
you understand yourself.
If only you could feel me
my presence is astonishing.
You can feel the energy rushing
through your finger tips.
If only you could realize
that I am speaking to you.
In a louder voice than normal.
And when I speak of myself
I speak of you.

Josef Wilhelm Jun 2012

One's Majesty

I think if I fall I will get up
I will take fourth this hand
I hold out for myself.
Indulge in things that I love,
Things that I strive for
Nothing truly matters now,
But what matters to me
Is that I become what I want to be.
And nothing less.
No distractions.
Ignoring the poison people try to give you.
Don't listen to them.
Your own ideas will unfold.
Like a roll of parchment that
you accidentally drop down the stairs.
Your own red carpet of fame.
It's funny how I speak to myself
Trying to convince myself that I'm ****.
My logic will always conquer
That which is unfit in my mind.
So bow down my inner self.
You are your own majesty.
A king.

Josef Wilhelm Jun 2012

My Own Secret

Don't stop, keep lying.
I'll see right through your bitter words.
My skin is made of steel that is unscathed.
Try to tear me apart I won't ever respond.
You fail me.
So I won't speak a thought in my mind,
for it wouldn't be productive in any way.
I'll turn my back on you and feel nothing.
For I am in control.
You are not.
I'll fall into this never-ending dream
of unknown futures,
and unknown pasts.
What questions will I ask myself before I even leave?
No one knows, no one knows.
Can I even take a shot?
Cracking open these wondrous thoughts?
No one can help me,
"The Independent one."
Self proclaimed of course.
For I can only proceed with this monstrous task.
It feels like banging your head against the wall.
Against a brick wall.
But the result is something special.
Internal peace.
Justifiable actions.
Excuse-less mistakes.
Logical decisions.
Unlimited power.
Only I can attain this for myself.
The lonely half-fallen angel.
Not everyone is perfect.
But you should only pray for your own forgiveness.
That is my secret.

Josef Wilhelm May 2012

Brother

Brother, come back to me.
This isn't how i remember you.
This hollow perspective.
You had this sun inside you.
It shined right through.
So come back home.
Come back home....
Brother

Brother, here I am.
Talk to me, speak with me any time you can.
How can you justify all of this pain?
Why is it, all of it is driving me insane?
So walk with me, and laugh with me
Follow me with clarity.
I will lead, just lead the way
Your consciousness won't fade to grey.

So oh my god.
Why are you still waiting here?
Won't you run away?
So follow me, swallow me
I will lead the way.
Don't give up just keep on going
or your pride will sway.
Follow me, follow me.
Brother.

Brother, come back home.
Why wont you, why can't you
pick up your ******* phone?
So forget this life that you lead.
All of this could turn to greed.
Trip and fall get up again
You wrote a death note with your pen.
Don't look back to see them laughing.
Don't let them see that you're crying.

Now oh my god.
Why am I still waiting here?
I don't know the way.
I'll stay right here, stay right here
You're pushing me away.
Can't give up just keep on going
or my pride will sway
So run away, run away.
Brother.

Brother, you are gone.
You left this place, this ***** place
to be the devil's pawn.
This wasn't what I had in mind
I was here, always here
Now there's no where you can hide.
You couldn't try enough..
I wasn't good enough...
I wasn't fast enough..
You weren't strong enough..
And now I've had enough..

Well oh my god.
Why am I still waiting here?
I can't even move.
I'll follow you, follow you.
You can lead the way.
I'll crumple up this ****** note.
You took my pride away.
I will sway, I will sway
Goodbye, Brother..