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Josef Wilhelm Mar 2012
Heavy sweat drips from my grimly face
And I tell the devil that I forbid him
From ever giving me solemn advice again
No contracts will be drawn from his burning quiver
No delicate words of truth exchanged
My thoughts pass through his muddy swamp
And tread lightly on solid ground
So beware my anger
Beware my gracefulness
Beware my subconscious
And beware my self
For he is the most reluctant to trust
I don't blame her for this decision
I don't blame me for my past
You will hate me for all of this
But at least I will be departed
For my ***** hands have gone transparent
I cannot guarantee the safety of my soul
The scars are always upon me
I will not tell you where I'm going
I will not say a word
I will not be this person
That has no self respect
I'll push my hand up from this soil
Like the undead that walk the night
Let me go
Watch me go
I'm never coming back
I'm never going back
I'm letting go
Now watch me fall
Watch me fall
Josef Wilhelm Mar 2012
Even though I wish you were here
You'll never be forgotten
The day you were taken
Our hearts were broken
Even when you've been gone so long
It feels like you never left
A piece of you is inside our hearts
Imprinted in our minds
Your presence lingers all around us
Everyone feels a different kind
We all share our own separate memories
Yet all have some in common
Your goofy laugh
Your hugs and smile
Your crazy ideas that mostly worked out
We miss you, we love you
We wish you could come back
So keep living on
Keep our hearts alive
And we will keep yours
Deep inside locked away safely
With a golden key that will always be there
Whenever we may need it
Goodbye our brother
Her love
Their son
Our friend
Our angel
Derrick T Smith
*Live on
Josef Wilhelm Feb 2012
Even in this morning weakness
I stay strong and can I keep this
Song playing inside my head
Feed this hunger that's never fed
Brush this darkness off again
Remember this maybe grab a pen
No one can persuade me
Or make me die with envy
No one can consume me
You can't be my enemy
I don't expect you to understand
I won't expect you to take my hand
My precious self continues to sustain
More than often I feel pain
But what is life without this feeling
I'd be an incomplete human being
Nothing to compare the good from bad
Wouldn't know if I'm happy or sad
Keep my chin up with all this mess
Maybe just maybe I'll pass the test
Life goes on before we know it
It can show us love from hatred
I'm strong at heart and in my mind
Look inside and you will find
Scratches and scars of all sizes
Jewels, gold, and similar prizes
Even though I've been through much
I'm warm and gentle to the touch
So maybe one day I won't be lonely
Maybe one day she will find me
I will always be myself
Because to me that is all my wealth
Josef Wilhelm Feb 2012
I try to make my own decisions.
Not everyone will agree.
Words cut me deep like incisions.
There's nothing wrong with me.
I'm not an idiot that doesn't think
I choose who I care about.
These words I hear they make me sink
Its me I think you doubt..
It's time that I just be alone
and let everyone forget me
I'll shut myself inside my home
before you all regret me.
Don't knock or call there is no answer
that in-which you seek.
Your words to me are like a cancer
I wish you wouldn't speak.
I am now inside my hollow cavern
I have everything I need.
My memories will bounce and burn.
My mind will always bleed.
There's nothing more I want to do
than close the cellar door.
I'm not here impressing you
I can't see you anymore.
All is black inside my heart
And I'm bonded to my sorrows.
I continue to play my part.
I sure hope no one else follows.
Josef Wilhelm Feb 2012
Maybe it's just me and I'm just ignorant
Maybe this isn't pain and I'm just dreaming it
Maybe I'm on drugs so I can't feel
Maybe I don't exist and I'm not real
Maybe things will be normal some day
Maybe it's just the things that I say
Maybe I'm just nothing and can't make a difference
Maybe I'm just the one I need to convince
That life is beauitful and not to be ashamed
To smile and hold my head held high
To forgive myself and remember my soul
To love again with all my heart
Maybe this is all a game
If so maybe I will play
Josef Wilhelm Jan 2012
I bit into this apple,
that I call myself.
Juices running down my cheek,
I think they call this wealth.
I take off dashing to the door,
to open it and see.
Looking down at the floor,
you are my sanity.
As soon as I go to speak,
words escape my brain.
That's because my friend you see,
I think I've gone insane.
I taste colours and smell textures,
What is wrong with me?
I hear pictures, I see fractures,
I must be sad to see.
I think my mind has been split,
into many different pieces.
There's only one way they could fit,
and your guess is as good as mine is.
These melting legs make it hard to run,
but don't worry I'm still glad.
It's simply really not that fun,
I think I'm going mad.
Once I lay down to think,
I hear my own voice speaking.
Open your eyes to see the link,
to understand you're dreaming.
Josef Wilhelm Jan 2012
You will see one day as I do.
When I feel I can understand you.
When life gives us hope and faith in what drives us.
The sky pulls towards our eyes,
and pushes us to feel smaller than anything.
But just hold me against you in our meadow,
so we can be forever grateful of this life.
Then grasp your soul in ones hand,
and watch as it changes right before your eyes.
The things you will see will make you fly towards all that you desire.
You will see the passions and inspirations that drive you
on a straight stretch of pure wonders.
Separation of all these emotions bring forth
times wasting before we can even realise.
Don't run or panic for this is your time
to be yourself with me as your guide.
Because is my minds eye I can see this can last forever.
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