God, Sin, Love, Evil.

The four aspects of my life.
I shall put my evil deeds in the past
while bearing my sins with this left arm.
I will always turn my face to the Lord and follow
while fighting for what I love with this right arm.

Occasionally a fire dims
Ever lower and lower until it is a speck
A speck in the darkness
Destined to fade from this world
Already facing the end it weeps

Tears of isolation
That dampen its soul
Cold and alone
Wanting of nothing
Ready to face and embrace darkness
When a candle comes to its side

It gives the little speck light
Without fear of consequence
A part of itself begins to grow in the tiny flame
It grows and grows until it is a burning star in the sky
Even the sun becomes envious

All it took to create this beautiful light
Was the acknowledgment of another
To realize it had a friend in the dark
For without the light of friendship
Every soul would fade

Go forth and rid this world of darkness
Do not turn aside from a failing light
Run to its side
Bring it into your arms
Protect it with your hands
Nurture it with your love
Guide it with your mind
Watch it grow with your eyes

Watch it grow until you can no longer look
And it shines in the sky for all to see
So one day when your light begins to fade
The star will come back to you
To help you rise once again
Or to be with you until the very end

An end where you look around
And see all the lights of love
So that you can feel their warmth
To let you know that you are with friends
Friends who will shed tears at your end

Not tears of sadness
Tears of joy
For the wonderful light you were
That saved them from the darkness
The light that will live on in them
Ready to give to the weak

No light is to small to save
To dark to lighten
Not as long as there is a candle in the dark
To become apart of your own flame
And guide this world into a beautiful tomorrow

A tomorrow where fires burn bright
Dreams come true
And souls are at peace

The magic of religion
brings hope to many a man
it is what guides us
without it we are lost with no plan

It is the light clearing darkness
bringing sight to the blind
leading us toward the right path
bringing joy for us to find

Yet through all of these miracles there is no peace
different beliefs bring war
martyrs die on the daily
people end, moving no more

We must move past hatred
the truth behind religion is not anger
the meaning behind religion is not war

It is faith
It is peace

People are always fighting
gunfire oh so blinding
a soldiEr yells and the bullet flies
a child unknowingly falls to die
families don't hAve time to morn
young rebels have hearts of scorn
old dictators have **Care for the poor
they only want to fill their pockets more
it seems that the wars will never ceasE
all anyone wants is worldly.....

Hear me my God, my Father, my Lord.

My heart if filled with dark and dread.
I'm afraid I wish to just be dead.

Despair holds me with a force.
I'm afraid I'm not on course.

Guide my heart, guide my soul.
I will pay any toll.

Bring me back to my right of mind.
So that I will be forever kind.

Thank you my Lord, my Father, my God.

There is a demon in every soul
Every day it continues to grow
Please do not give in to it
For it has a heavy toll

It picks away at your mind
You can't fathom the pain
It tears, cuts, and carves
Soon the light you can't find

From it you try to hide
By day you have friends
By night you have a glass
**** it will not step aside

You try to pray
God does not answer
The devils' grip tightens
You only look for the end of the day

I'm trying to find the light
My shoulders are sore from sin
The demon is laughing
I am losing my fight

I feel a shadow over my head
it makes my body feel of lead.
Every day it gets worse still
it has total control of my will.
Dark things are put in my head
they make it hard to get out of bed.
Soon I feel I will give in
then the shadow will finally win.

Today there is no one around
but I hear a cutting sound.
On the floor my body is laid
In my hand a ****** blade.
This shadow is in control
the essence of my life it has stole.
I watch as my blood begins to settle
and I can't look away form the cold metal.
With effort to the mirror I go up
only one glance makes me throw up.

Now I am afraid to be alone
every time the cut is deeper to the bone.
My loved ones don't see it at all
only one knows of my fall.
A person who my life and heart I trust
which I feel much more than lust.

This shadow over me
please do not let it be.
I think I know who it does resemble
but the thought makes me tremble.
It is a person who this pain brought
for this person owns my feelings and thought.
It is the person who I never wish to go
my beautiful and amazing Angelico.

You said that he wasn't better than me. He was different and that was what you needed.......

He doesn't Imagine happiness.
He doesn't gouge out his own skin.
He doesn't overflow with self-pity.
He doesn't dream of having no memory.
He doesn't Avoid mirrors.
He doesn't Miss what it's like to smile.
He doesn't hurt himself with knives.
He doesn't envision life where he doesn't exist
He doesn't lie to everyone around him.
He doesn't pray to have no memory.
He doesn't Scream on the inside when he sees you.
He doesn't Openly hurt what he loves most.
He doesn't Regret almost everything that he has ever done.
He doesn't Realize that he is a terrible person.
He doesn't Yell into the darkness.
He doesn't meet a counselor every week.
He doesn't end his day by crying himself to sleep at night.

......... You were right he is different. And that makes him **** better than me.