From dark to light,
Feelings sparked that night.
They were down,
I pretended I was a clown.

I told you I'd make you smile,
But you never let me.
Reasons were too deep
That digging won't give me a sweat.

Sweet, I thought.
If only you've done it,
As I watched the sky,
Every night as I pray.

Dates were too fast,
The melody didn't even last.
Still, I opened my senses,
To absorb what's about to flash.

Lightning in a perfect day,
My eyes couldn't resist,
Though it shows trouble
I gave it a smirk.

Seasons change, I turned 18,
I accepted rumors
Rejected facts.
Nothing stays the same.

My hands became my shield,
When I cry,
When I laugh,
When I try to end this life.

Little flames crossed my path,
Hot as a hundred degree,
Never wanted to feel it,
But they kept coming closer.

Heavy clouds are forming,
Yes! This is going to save me.
Miracle as what I expected,
Droplets avoided me.

Am I cold or warm?
Can’t answer either.
Fog covered my doorstep,
So exit was never meant to be.

World is different;
Piles of mess,
A bunch of curse,
And endless war.

Secret character,
A flirting voice,
River of tears,
Damaged soul.

Filthy hands,
With pockets full;
Broken hearts,
Misused mind.

Sinful sights,
Begging for more.
Hidden truths,
All behind that door.

She’s back in the picture.
Bothered myself for what’s on the view.
Will I be noticed with my ribbon?
Or just same black and white animation?

Penned some hurtful words,
Though I know it’s not going to help.
I scrolled the list of my what-to-do’s,
Yet unable to find something to go to.

Invisible as air,
Tried to understand to be fair,
But I know somehow,
There’s a meaning behind that vow.

If your voice could heal,
I’d pray I’ll always be there.
Imagine my anger,
I could not even sober.