Poet, live melancholically as
A man with one eye and full vision.
Ambition but no depth
Perception.

Poet, live longingly as
A child in the corner.
Watching mother's wrist.

Poet, live remiscingly as
A bird crossing the street
Via sidewalk as a ghost.

Poet, live unconsciously as
A murderer, staring down at
A floorboard. Not blood but—ink
On your hands.

ceaseless crying.

soak the pillow...onto the bed.



tears absorbed, oil absorbed, sweat absorbed,

cigarette burns, *****, weight, arrogance,

seclusion, hesitation, longing,

itch.



one oozed with love, with purity.

snug, tender, sensible, giving.



two oozed with destruction, with vulgarity.

deep, hidden, masked, distanced, deceptive.



one gushed desperation.



he wasn't absorbed.

i will wade out
                        till my thighs are steeped in burning flowers
I will take the sun in my mouth
and leap into the ripe air
                                       Alive
                                                 with closed eyes
to dash against darkness
                                       in the sleeping curves of my body
Shall enter fingers of smooth mastery
with chasteness of sea-girls
                                            Will i complete the mystery
                                            of my flesh
I will rise
               After a thousand years
lipping
flowers
             And set my teeth in the silver of the moon

Family always said I was exceptionally well behaved.
Teachers always said I was cooperative and quiet.

They never knew I was peaking on the fear of being the slightest bit noticed by my peers
They never knew I wanted nothing to do with participation or aknowledgement
They never knew I was a soul-less being, just to observe the others around me
They never knew I was worthless, undeserving, unmotivated
They never knew I caged myself inside like a hibernating bear to avoid social crowds

I never knew I didn't have to live this way.
Until now