Step by step I head closer to the water
I look upon its vastness with great despair
Each step I take brings me closer to my death
I taste the salty brine of the ocean’s air
I can hear the crashing of its waves
The water rushes past my feet
It’s cold enough that it makes it not feel like summer
Another wave passes me by this time I was ready for it

I walk deeper into the water
It feels like it’s been hours since I started but it’s been only minutes
I’m waist level now
The brisk water flows past me
The sun is setting
I want to go further but know if I do I won’t come back

Pray for my veins as I slice them so carefully
Skill like a surgeon as my cuts are so precise
Let the liquid flow from my arms
Just like the tears that drop from my eyes
I put down the blade, and wrap myself up
Tell myself it’s the last time
That I’m done
I know I lied to myself that night
For every other night I do the same thing
I guess I feel as if I open myself up the thing that hurts most will leave

And no amount of alcohol can make me forget the way it was to hold you
I still can’t bear the fact you’re gone, it’s been two months and two weeks
Two months and two weeks of total hell
Two months and two weeks of me hating myself
I made a promise to my friend that I wouldn’t drink away my problems anymore
I’m finding it hard to cope with the day to day activities as this and that just constantly reminds me of you
It’s been two months and two weeks of feeling dead
But before that it was two years of feeling like I could take on the world
It’s been two months and two weeks since we ended it and no amount of alcohol can make me forget the way it was to hold you

That punk rock girl with that dip-dyed hair
Standing around, her skin so fair
Smoking that cigarette she stole from her friend
After all, it won't **** her till the end

That punk rock girl with that dip-dyed hair
She looks at me with love and care
She thinks I don't notice the twinkle in her eye
I do, but say nothing, I just stand back and sigh

That punk rock girl with that dip-dyed hair
Standing around, her skin so fair
Breathing in the cancer she stole from her friend
After all, death is just around the bend.

You know that feeling you get when you try to do something
Just anything really
But you make one little slip up and you suddenly feel like your dying

Even though that one little slip was so minor that no one would care
You think to yourself, “oh god I ****** up, I ****** it all up”

Well that’s how I feel all the time
There’s no real way to stop it

You know that feeling you get when you try to do something
Again, just anything really
But you have another little slip up and you really start to feel like your dying

That slip may have meant nothing to anyone
Or they said it’s okay
But you think to yourself “Why did I even try why why why”

You think, “I hate myself, I hate this, I hate that”

There are a few ways to stop it, but they aren’t very good.
I’ll just quit while I’m ahead before I put you all in a bad mood.

I just wanted to say
Well that’s how I feel
How I feel all the time

Let’s take a drink
Or two or three
Let’s take a few more
So I can barely see
I look around the house, you aren’t there

She grabs my hand I don’t know her name, she probably doesn’t know mine either
She leads me away and closes the door
Later on I’ll forget
I’ll wake up on the floor
Just full of regret

Let’s take a pill
or three or four
It’s not enough to ****
Oh **** it let’s just take more

If you can’t tell I’m out of my head
Dear God I can’t stand the way I am anymore
At some points I’d much rather be dead

Just.. Just tell me you love me
Tell me you care
I'll flush the pills, and not another drink
I, for one, think that's fair

You're better than death, for that I know
I searched that house or just a hope
Just a reason for me to go

I found one but she hasn't found me

I know we have our bad days
But you’re more addictive than ******* crystal ****
I don’t really show that I care
But I still love you to death

I know we had another fight and I left
But honestly I’d rather sever my wrists than sever my ties to you
You truly mean so much to me that it just breaks me
I really don’t know what to do

It’s okay if we’re over
Just please still let’s be friends
I’ll stop ******* up
I’m just trying to have this mend

Just like I said
You mean a whole lot to me
I’m just so bad at showing it
That I know that you rather I let you be