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Jae Elle Sep 2012
we could have danced upon
the levee with the tips
of our bare
toes
for many ages
& still not be rid of
the bitter taste of anxiety
& horror that at any
misfortune-filled moment
the river would swell and swallow
us whole

the feeling of fear is like nothing
in this world
& sometimes I don't think
I can shake it
his eyes are resting on my
collarbone
jesus christ, man
I can't take it

make-believe misgivings
cigarette sweet
took residency in my ribcage
& I swear they'll never
leave

so if we got all we
came for
its best we take to the
unforgiving streets


while I silently observe
as you practice
& you
preach
Jae Elle Sep 2012
my cunning wit
has vanished into the waves
& the uncertain deep

I want you to really see me


even as you sleep


I wanted to be carved within
the whispers
behind your teeth

I want to be the prey beckoning
the slow mellow
creep



& I want you to feel the
fire as I drag you
underneath
Jae Elle Sep 2012
what did you give
that I could never take away?




how could you
ever love





& then so swiftly shatter
faith?
Jae Elle Aug 2012
he'd left her lips
pulsing red
at the very thought of him
sharing his
bed

all was left unsaid
she took her pills
& sought solace in her
head

there is nothing in the
world
more difficult to wake
than the dead
aside from
the ghost in her
conscience
& the sorrow she
fed



nothing more to dread



but the road she has not yet
the courage to
tread
Jae Elle Aug 2012
we got into it about me going to visit my mother on Friday
he said that my mother
& all of my friends in Cedar Vale
are a bad influence on
our son and he doesn't want me
going there
& that it didn't matter if I loved them
because they treat me
like ****

all of my friends do, did
you know that?
because no one ever comes to see me
so that means that nobody loves me
except for him
of course


'cause you always tell someone
you love
that you'd leave her if she ever
got pregnant again

that the way she behaves is
stupid *******
that her panic attacks are
stupid *******
& you yell in her face and
corner her
as she starts to have one
& she cries and gasps and cries


then she opens the window to breathe in
the cool stormy night
& breathes out


"This conversation is over until we have a mediator. That is final."
Jae Elle Aug 2012
everything turned to nothing
summer simmered down
blood boiled up

I can scream into my pillow
the whole world will still listen
& pretend not to hear

I've become everything that
I feared

stupid
lazy
child-like


I built a house of hate
drop of a hat
insta-rage


coffee doesn't sharpen
wit
& liquor left me little
lip



lost hope for the one who
knew better

but never
quit
Jae Elle Aug 2012
turning tables
now you're the one
left in the midst
of the depth
& the dark
like a scorned yet
desirous lover
frantically picking at
flower petals

"he loves me"

"he loves me not"

by the time you've reached
that last pluck
you've become so unsure
of a heart's
folly
that you toss the
tortured daisies
& reach in the grass
to start
anew
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