give me your
ghosts
& I'll fight the
fairest faces of the
earth
to prove you don't
belong where
you are

we only expose the very
barest
of our skin to the
things that know not
how to love

& he still turns away
disgusted
at the sight of a
tear

we continue to find our
little hope
in loveless places
& you continue
to puzzle me
with your peculiar
grace

we would have made
phenomenal outlaws
driving down the
desert highway
resistant to death
& calmly causing a mockery
of the
cracked and brittle bones
of the vast
decaying wilderness

yeah, we would have
if you'd only let me
use your gun
for the greater good

stay away from the computer
clean the apartment
remove toddler from dangerous objects
stay away from the computer
clean the apartment
**** myself
clean the apartment
stay away from the computer
remove toddler from dangerous objects
look for a job
before my husband throws me out
clean the apartment

rinse
repeat

he called her his
constellation
& set her up in
the sky
with care and precision

she fell anyway
in all those little bits
& pieces of stars
but it was far more
magnificent
than anyone could have
hoped for
in her demise

a piece of her landed
in my backyard
& when she cooled off
I picked her up

she was so lonely
& had been that way
for a time

"don't cry,"
I said with conviction.
"I can keep you
forever
if you'd like."

a smile crept upon
her lips
like sullied
enchantment

"oh honey,
I've seen forever

it is endless
endless
& annoying as
hell."

"yes, I'll have one
lobotomy
on the rocks


pretty please."

I stood in the door way as he put his coat on
he said
"let's go. I don't know what you're waiting on."

our son was babbling
so I playfully babbled with him
"don't repeat him. he knows how to say 'ah.' teach him real words."

he pulled the car in front of the store
I thought he was waiting for someone to cross the road
"GO. what are you ******* sitting there for?"

he drove past the turn
I remained silent
"thanks for reminding me to ******* turn there so we could go to the office"

I get back in the car with the slip
that says I owe 32 hours of community service
or we lose our tenancy
"I don't even know why you stopped going. all you do is sit around and do ******* nothing all day, instead of looking for a real job."



days like this are offering a lot less
than glitter and gold



I should have something brave
and hopeful to respond with

but I don't


this isn't a poem
this is the truth
but I won't do much else with it
than write about it
'cause the talking don't help
& it usually leaves me a
lot worse off

anyway

how was your day, honey?

one can never be
too careful
in open recollections of
what they see when
they are sleeping

we sat in one of the
middle pews
in a church I attended
as a child
you held my hand
& kissed my hair

then we were on
my couch
while my fingers traced
the back of your neck
bare
& so forgiving

real or not real?

could have sworn you looked
happy

but they say everyone in
your dreams
is only a reflection of
yourself

which is very clear
to me
when I wake up and you're
not around

it makes me feel
obsessed
pathetic
mad
vicious
& weird with want
a criminal
laden with a seven year
desire

& the days spent
thereafter
are anxious and very
low

they really ought to
medicate me
too much truth for my
tongue to be telling
maybe soon I'll start calling
you by your
name