I find this world to be
A moss-covered rock
What once was beauty
Is now something I mock

The trees and oceans are becoming soiled
With the disgusting wastes of our kind
The sun used to shine upon us like a light
Now, a midst the clouds, it's hard to find

Not only is our world polluted
With the garbage that we litter
It's being polluted with
Our angered feelings, so bitter

I hate the pressure we put upon ourselves
The angry feelings we have for one another
Why do we force ourselves to fake our love
When we can't just truly love each other?

That's too much to ask of us, apparently
For we can never truly love
Our feelings are muffled by the angry words
That come from above

It's like asking for a shark to live without water
Or a human to live without air
Oh how cruel this world has become
I don't know how much of this I can bare

Truth is that I can't tell you
The exact way that I feel
The tears would fall endlessly
The scars I have will never heal

Truth is that you can't even handle it
Handle the pain I have in this heart
The way I've been absorbing this pain
Would tear your insides apart

My body still stands strong
Tall as a brick wall
But I feel so hollow inside
Like there's a hole

You see me in a way
That no one else sees me
I can tell you're trying
so hard to see what I see

But to be honest, you can't
Because my eyes only see pain
They see the horrific things
That would make anyone insane

It's a huge world war
Each day in my soul
It's just a matter of time
Before I completely fall

I must fall for the well being of my mind
Fall for the well being of those I hold dear
For if they knew the pain I feel inside
I would be someone that everyone would fear

The world seems so much brighter
When you see the world through my eyes
Every flower has a smile
No one ever leaves and says goodbye

It's like everything's clear
There are hardly any clouds
The sun shines brightly
And there are huge happy crowds

I can't explain how my eyes
Seem to turn **** into gold
It's a gift, I've got to admit
A super power, If I may be so bold

Everyone wonders why I always have a smile
Everyone wonders "Jessie, what makes you so glad"
I tell every one of those people the same thing
"Guys, to tell you the truth, the world ain't that bad."

They can roll their eyes and deny me
They can even disparage my belief
They can never take away my eyes
Not even for a moment that's very brief

They can all look at the **** of this world
They can look at glass and see its half empty
I'd probably look at the same glass
And tell them, "Mmm, that water looks tasty."

Why must the world hate because of my smile?
I just see things in color and not black and white
I'm sure there are more people just like me
And together with these people, happiness is our right

All the pain just pumps through
Every last capillary, artery and vein
Night and day it builds and clots
I can no longer endure this pain

My heart pumps faster and faster
As if I'm doing a serious of sprints
Each pump feels like a drum beat
Each pump makes me wince

Why do I do this to myself?
Why do I fall so hard for another?
Why does my heart plead and beg?
Why does it have to be such a bother?

I can't forget the pain
I can't forget her face
I have a gallery of girls in my mind
Each one with her own personal grace

Each one haunts me every night
They chant and taunt me
"You did everything wrong!"
The tears haze the world I see

I see in total and absolute pain
Each person is like a rose's thorn
A single touch would make me bleed
Oh how I wish I knew why I was born.

Truth, in itself
Is an illusive being
A lie, however
Is easy in seeing

Trust is hard to come by
Distrust is the Norm
How did we get this way?
I won't do you harm.

All those times that I was there
Can't you see my true face?
I tried to show you I was here
Your words stung like Mace

Everyone makes mistakes
Mistakes that we don't mean
This was the case
How obvious could I have been?

The broken heart
That lays dead on the floor
That is your doing
Why'd you kick ME out the door?

As I sit here, watching you sulk
I have an epiphany of my own
I did absolutely nothing wrong
Your self-esteem, you must hone

One cannot blame others
for the pain one may feel
I realize that now
Your lonely fate, you have sealed

The blood drips down
My quivering lips
I stare at my hands
As the blood drips

This sickening thought
plagued my mind
The thought keeps coming
Logic is now asinine

It replays over and over
Like a movie in my head
I can't shake the thought
That she's probably dead

I loomed over her
Like an Angel of Death
I inhaled her scent
With each and every breath

Her incessant bleeding
Soils the sheets
Her heart has stopped
No longer does it beat

The aching inside my heart
All it does is grow
I can't handle it anymore
Even I am a foe

What have I done...
WHAT HAVE I DONE
She keeps on bleeding!
A while ago, this was fun!

HER EYES...
THEY KEEP ON STARING
My mind's keeping me from leaving
My minds state...badly faring

Only...sanctuary
Is this piece of Steel
So cold to the touch
It'll stop this ordeal

Just load it here
**** it there.
Place it right here
Now...I won't see her stare

BOOM!

I wish I could go back in time
And ask you face-to-face
Why you would do this to me
You left without a trace

Did you really think
That I never cared?
Even after all the moments
That we spent and shared?

Was there no emotion
In my "I love you"?
Did you not think
That I was true?

I would have loved you
With all of my heart
I meant everything I said
Every single part

Why didn't you care to listen?
Why didn't you wait for me?
I would've been there in a heartbeat
I could've set you free

I had the key to your blackened heart
For you, I always did try
From the beginning, it was never enough
You never even said "Goodbye"