we reach for the cuboards,
we  pull on the fridge,
we twist a cap or two... pop a pill or three.
we're all in need of an escape.
she reached for the cuboards,
she pulled on the fridge,
she popped that pill.
there is no escape.
she turned to a mirror...
does she like what she sees?
so bleak.
she rubs her mascara into her cheeks
as a desperate attempt to hide her tears.
her fears swell.
her dreams shrink.
she thinks,
will i ever be liberated?

She pushed,
she pulled,
she fell.

She wrestled with her thoughts as she lay there in a puddle of her misery;
the puddle was clear and smelled of dreams coated in doubt.


[To be continued]

There's a burning desire in me
Much like the sun as it melts into the sky,  bleeding through, the moon fills my walls with shadows;
Twisting, they go;
Dancing across the walls, up the stairs, and into my bed they lie.

I coat my body with your skin,
I breathe you in hoping for a cloud of familiar scents.
I'm dancing with a stranger..
I'm dancing with danger...
Only to bury you inside me, inside him.

With every touch, push, pull,
Knowing he is not what I want, I am not what he wants, I find temporary satisfaction with this chemical reaction only to be left empty when the sun rises taking the moon, shadows, and chemicals with it.

The ******* of my reflection has really heightened my realization...

I realize the mirror speaks volumes
To who I call on,
Reach out to,
Cling to...

Only you, mirror,
Only you who sees me...
Feels me, comforts me, loves me.

All who claim to
Dont do..
Just speak the words due.

They taunt you,
Leaving haunted a body so blue
From the holding of one's breath in hopes that love will anew...

You...
Me...
We all are guilty.

None of us are free.
Caged like every bird sings of once or twice...

Just might...
Find freedom in reflection,
Freedom that penetrates,
Freedom that really sets us straight.

I wonder what left I took to get here,
I wonder how many rights it will take to fix it.
I've never felt so lonely.
I know I want more, need more.
I'm wandering with my hand empty, but it's becoming a heavy load.
I need someone to hold it,
To guide me,
I'm ready.
I need to go..
See, I'm a free spirit, a free soul...
But these limits are taking a toll.
So, you, come walk with me...
We can both be free.

Searching your face for some sort of subliminal message,
rolling your words around on my tongue just so I can get a taste of what it is you want to say.

either I have no palate for the words I taste,
or your words are meant to be bland...

Syllables beating, like your heart,
bringing the poem to life.


the rythym of your words
guides my hands down your body
like the rythym of  a poem would guide my eyes down a page.

my eyes search your face for the plot,
the story...
the reason,
for this moment.

Your sentences twirling around my body,
wrapping themselves around my unspeakable's.

I gasp.
exhale.

you're inside me,
you're thoughts have temporarily invaded my once logical thinking.
we are. temporarily one.

I love a good poem.

It seems I have a lot to say..
It seems there are a lot of things I want to do...
so many people I want to know..
but many more I'd rather not.

It seems I have passion,
It seems I have drive...
maybe even some dedication,
but how do you start going without any direction?

It seems I like to rhyme,
It seems I have got the time...
It seems to drag by...
or fly.

It seems I need more words,
It seems I need more emotions than just doleful.
Maybe I could be a bit more full of soul...
or love...
or joy...
or U...

You visit every once in a while,
Tickling my imagination,
Romanticizing my fantasies,
And teasing my lips.

I try to grab hold of you, make you stay, but I always lose my grip.

Slipped.
Gone.
Never mine.

My muse, forever.

Forever craving you,
Your mind,
Your love...

Forever, I'll chase you..
In my dreams.

My muse, forever.

A swift walk down the hall,
I catch a glimpse...
your shadow lingers behind me. I shiver a bit.
I know you know I sense your presence, but still,
in my bed you climb at night haunting my dreams.

I wake in the morning, I feel your cool breath on my cheek.
I grab the blankets tight.
release.
there's no point...
I can still feel you.
I know you're there, behind me,
watching me.

Walking down the street,
people stare...
I know they want to ask about you,
but, instead, they coward with fear. I don't blame them.
So, instead of spending my Saturday night with friends,
I fill this lonely chair with an even lonelier body and hope that you'll just disappear.

Wake up. Life. Repeat.
In the mirror over the sink,
I look and see you and me...
however, your you IS me...
I'm the monster they all see.

I love how your pale skin sits slouched, formed against that cool dark chair.

That hat, oh... That hat.
There's something so boyish about the way that hat sits on your head.
It's cute, I should add.

The nonsense you ramble on about,
Well... Maybe it isn't nonsense. I'm usually too distracted by the corners of your lips to really understand your words.

So, I nod.
Mmhhmm...

You continue. You move. I watch.
I watch the way you walk; your hands in your pocket like they have something to say so you stuff them away.

I still try and listen.
Eh, nothing...

She pushed,
she pulled,
she fell.

She wrestled with her thoughts as she lay there in a puddle of her misery;
the puddle was clear and smelled of dreams coated in doubt.


[To be continued]

Take your head off,
I'll take mine off, too.
Let us uncover our thoughts,
And smother our bodies, too.

Just spill your mind onto my lap,
Burying me in your dreams.
We can fight the Monday blues together,
Ignore all that we weather....
Just me and you..
You and me..
Just be.

We can paint a better picture,
Mold it into all that we desire...
We'll form two bodies that rest into one
And just stick it onto the shelf for all to admire.

Come on in,
Let us fill this room...

Exchange a few polite stares.
Your name sits on the tip of my tongue like your dinner plate at the edge of this table in front of your empty chair.

Let us sit.

The room fills with familiar you's, Never familiar scents.

I take a sip.

The water rolls around in my mouth, Distracting my lips.

I grip.

The fork feels heavy in my hand, I offered you a plate but never cooked You a meal.

Dinner has come to an end.

I put my dish aside, clean up my mess. I wish you would have made it.

I wish you the best.

It's a Cloud of chemicals..
Your Body craving hope,
Your Mind full of disappointments,
It's kind of cynical.

Pull me in,
Like you always do.
I'll fall apart,
Like you expect me to.
C'mon, We are only physical..

Although,
10,000 miles away,
I can still smell you.
100,000 feet above the planes,
I can still feel you.
A million faces a day,
Yours is all I see...

Just one touch,
I might crumble.
All this time away..
One kiss, and I might shatter.
Do we fall apart?
Or will we fall together?
All the pieces mirror a puzzle..
Stick me here, you there...

Then frame us to stay.

One day.