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Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
I once saw a star and claimed it as my own.
As I made a wish the more it glowed.
Brighter and brighter as I saw it shine,
sure I was; That my wish would soon be mine.

In the depth of my soul, I felt a spark.
I waited on my wish, that was made in the dark.
Night after night I waited with hope,
for this was the night I pulled my star down with faith and rope.

Years have passed and my star seems all but willing,
To grant me my wish; why I believed...I was so silly
I guess it could happen, for I've seen strangers things.
for I've seen sparkle in true love, and diamond rings.

I've since lost that star that I once claimed as my own,
for now I pray some troubled child, did the same and their wish has grown.
Made them better, happier,  and more complete,
Made them love, be loved, and sit in a queen's seat.

I still gaze at the stars and wish; I'm still believing,
I still wish when I see the time 11:11..
Maybe I should wish more, for there's a little rust,
and maybe you will get one sprinkled in stardust.

As i write this I tempted to go outside,
and gaze on the stars, and wish that wish that once was mine.
If your night is bleak, sad, and your all alone.
Join me outside and make a wish....A wish of your own..
Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
Ever feel like dying?
ever feel alone?
Ever feel like crying?
lost child in a store.

Ever feel life pushing?
shoving you away
every feel like breaking down?
funeral in the rain.

Feel life slipping away...

Stand in the corner and scream with me,
a body full of empty
a head that's full of rage better believe it.

Stand in the closet and scream with me,
a mind that's like a fire
driven by the pain better believe it...

Ever feel like lying down inside a grave?
Listening to eulogy; a pyre on the hay.
Ever danced beside the devil?
Taste the barrel of a gauge?

Ever pull the trigger?
The light begins to fade.

Feel life slipping away...
Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
The shouting,
the screams,
The fear,
you wanted seen.

Things crashing,
things being thrown,
Tears in my eyes,
What about me was so wrong?

I hated you,
I prayed you'd die,
God cave the mines,
crush his body. I don't think I'd cry

Yet here you came,
with your wicked fist,
Beating us down,
I think your mind would insist.

I guess I went through it,
and became what I am,
No perfect parent,
but teaching my son to be a better man.

I swore I would never be like you,
The screaming, cussing , whipping, all you'd do

I thank God that man is gone,
For I forgive you; and all you done.

The thing that sticks out the most,
is the feeling I got with just a toss.
Throwing a baseball with you
Showed me joy; whoever knew

You had your moments,
when i wanted you around,
When you showed love,
and you mouth made no undermining sound.

You made me who I am,
with all your despise.
and from that experience,
I'm better; My better self did arise..
Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
So young we were
as time flew by.
My cousin, my friend
My companion in sin.

Your smile was contagious
and your laugh brought tears.
You stood out, wherever you went
but just for 18 years.

A taken life, not by God,
but a simple man.
More like murderer at what he did,
cop car, four wheeler,  rockwall slammed.

No justice dealt to a sorry *******
No justice dealt to a so called cop
If I was just another person
I'd put it to his temple...click..clack...pop..

Everyone loved you
because you enjoyed all you'd do
and you helped others' see it
Even after all you went through.

I was there, I saw it all
I saw the bruises the blood
the fear in your eyes
as the wrath came like a flood.

Yet, you loved life
and helped people smile.
Your personal life hell,
your social life style.

I hear that song and remember our talks,
I hear that song and it cuts me like a knife,
I hear Green Day "The time of your Life."
I start to cry as I remember your life.

I miss you cousin, always have, always will.
Do me a favor and find my kids
and take them to the top of a hill.
Just laugh like you did when we played in snow,
I'll open my ears and hope I hear it down here; below
To my cousin and friend Steven. I miss you everyday
Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
Robert Frost (1874 - 1963)
Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound’s the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
Beside me you slithered
and guarded me against my foes.
On the verge of attack
you wrapped around my hand, and his attack slowed.

Curious he was as you abided my command,
Scared he was as you wrapped around my hand.
One strike then two,
Holy hell, he didn't know what to do.

Petrified as you hissed
He was frozen in time as your head started to twist.
I gave my command, and swore I saw you smile,
Then your eyes turned red: red like God cursed the nile.

As you unwrapped from around my hand,
I saw his fear, as more Serpents' covered the land.
Nowhere to go he stood awaiting his pain,
for each strike landed like a hard stinging rain.

This sense of power I felt I had,
Like 'Voldomort' who killed Harry's dad.
More serpents came and gathered round,
and swore an oath to protect me with a chilly hissing sound.

Complete control and fearless I am,
for I have hundreds of serpents abiding my command.
Am I evil, because serpents swarm at my feet,
I don't know, but I await my enemies at my Serpent's seat..
Jesse Belcher Jul 2013
3-7-2012
Not knowing the status of my child

To my child, who resides in heaven..

Beat for me baby beat for me please.
Beat for me baby put our hearts at ease.
Just your heart to flicker is all that we ask.
I know God hears our prayers it's a easy task.

Just to hold you in my arms and feel that love.
To see you with your mom and know the gift from above.
God please touch it's heart and bring it to life.
for me my kids and most of all my wife.

Can't you see the hurt we feel?
Or the joy the Devil will steal?
He mocks you as we go through this.
He fills my mind with anger and so much bliss!

I wanna give in, but know that i wont.
Turn away from you? No i don't.
Touch us lord and help us through.
For no one knows the outcome none but you.

Broken we will be and scattered all about,
Put us back together piece by piece you will i have no doubt.
But please beat for me baby i want to know.
what you'll be how you'll grow.

I'll see you soon, whether here or there.
But beat now, for there so long to bear.
To wait so long to see your face.
Like your sister's in that amazing place.

A long time to see you two is what it would be.
A very long time especially for your mother and me.
So beat for me baby is that such a task?
Please God start it's heart..is that too much to ask?

Notes:

It was written , while I was 'suffering through the second miscarriage of my young marriage.'
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