If my skin were a curtain
I'd pull back the drapes
at the corner of my clavicle.
the breathing, feeling organs
of my torso would reveal
what you never see.

the clenches in my stomach
when I catch your fleeting glance

the double-thump of my heart
relishing your bare shoulder

my lungs frozen--suffocating
under your cold, soft touch

shrinking with the biggest sigh
as I watch you walk away.

But I always wear my skin
two layers too thick
and hide my delightful shame
of delighting in shaming you.

it's three in the morning and
for the first time in so long,
the silence that rings in my ears doesn't remind me to think of you.
hours ago, i wondered when I would stop thinking-
when I would stop thinking of you.
yet now I feel strong.
now i feel like I could spend
three seconds, minutes, hours
being tortured by the silence and I'd be unphased.
I'd be unaware of you.

You'll be pestered with letters.
Partly because I like to look at your name in my messy handwriting but mostly because if I don't - I'd go crazy without saying half the things I'd try to say in person.

Sometimes I'll stare at you and wonder how on earth I ever managed to acquire such a beautiful creature.
And I'll wonder how long you'll take to realise you could do so much better.

I'll write you poetry,so many pieces.
Describing your eyes and your hands.
I'll write sonnets to the freckle on the right side of your neck.

I'll make you listen to songs that remind me of you & believe me there are many.
I'll write the lyrics on my hands hoping you'll be intrigued to search for answers.

I like code names, ridiculous ones.
So you'll get a few of those too.
I watch tons of movies, I'll do it while I lay my head on your chest.
I laugh at the most inappropriate times.

If public displays of affection embarass you - I'll embarass you everywhere we go.

You should know I'm over-emotional & extremely jealous. I get paranoid and I worry a lot too.

You'll be mine & I'll be yours.
You'll mean the world to me because I don't have anyone else.