I'm starving for flesh
Your beautiful canvas
My claws search for your weakest point
Such a delicate creature, my Prey
Crash from the hunt
He will be mine to devour

Wrap me in love
Fill my nose with his scent
Sleeves as rough as the hair on his arms
And as light as his lingering presence
Dad doesn't know I stole his favorite sweater
But I would've missed him otherwise
His hugs are rare
Kind words: sparse
But his sweater consumes me
I'm enveloped in his love
By his oversized sweater
Thank you, Dad,
I'll give it back to you later

Demands.
Questions.
Altercations.
Frustration.
I'm
Tearing
Apart.­

My hands are gripped
From two sides
Blind eyes
Walking a blurred path
To an uncertain end
There are no cross walks
The street lights are dim
The voices in my head
Over power each other
Teach me how to look

The starting line
Was bold from afar
Not even my crossing guards
Can help me now
My legs are tired
There is no end
Others are sprinting
My goal is lost
I am not enough
Mother, do you hear my pleas?
*Teach me how to talk

The little boy
Growing into his own shoes,
His very own big boy pants too!
He has premature features that
remind me of someone... someone...
But who?
A sincere childish smile with
Protruding teeth that melts any passerby
What about his popping belly?
To rub,
To feel during his hugs,
To love love love!
It really does remind me of someone...
But let me tell you about his nails
How they always seem to be just too long
Or the way he blushes when he's caught singing a song
Silly little boy with nails too long,
soft fingers, and growing hands
He might tuck them in his pants
The way Daddy does
Girl crushes and science tests and soon
Those big boy pants will walk him out to middle school
His charming retainer lisp will soon fade away
And remind me more of Dad everyday
They share a name
My dad's pride and joy
He's his mold, his little boy
The way he reads, even holds his posture
And all the little things just like his father

As my pillows were soaked by my pathetic tears
And my chest heaved of desperation,
He worked.

As I walked around with a blank look on my face
And people asked questions
He didn't know.

As I sit here and try to read to forget his worthless existence
And my heart still stupidly aching,
He is home with his wife.

"Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody." Catcher in the Rye

Running scenes thru your head
The torture the torture the torture...
Vivid memories enticing your senses
And all of a sudden,
You're there again...

To relive a moment.
That moment you always revert to
It's your safety
Your guardian
The mind knows where to find it
How to relive that scent,
           that taste,
                    that touch...

But when it fades away
And you're left in the same place
It found you in,
Where do you turn
But to solidarity, and melancholia

Yet each man kills the thing he loves
  By each let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
  Some with a flattering word,
The coward does it with a kiss,
  The brave man with a sword!
Some **** their love when they are young,
  And some when they are old;
Some strangle with the hands of Lust,
  Some with the hands of Gold:
The kindest use a knife, because
  The dead so soon grow cold.
Some love too little, some too long,
  Some sell, and others buy;
Some do the deed with many tears,
  And some without a sigh:
For each man kills the thing he loves,
  Yet each man does not die.