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Jennifer Apr 2017
All it took was one weekend
for those brown eyes to get me hooked.
I am way in over my head.
Jennifer Dec 2018
And then you kissed me.
We hadn’t been alone together for a while
But I knew I needed you in that moment
I was fragile, but you
You were so gentle.
My heart had already been racing
Better yet my mind was racing, my heart just followed while we clumsily enjoyed each other
Then there was a kiss, so sweet no candy could match it’s strength.
You leaned over and said “your heart is beating so fast”
My dear,
I know,
It’s been beating like this since the day I fell into your green eyes.
And then you kissed me.
Jennifer Jan 2022
I have a weird feeling inside.
My chest tightens as I think of you;
Each side tugging my ribs closer together until I can’t breathe.
When my eyes close,
I see her;
Dark and beautiful standing next to you.
You towering over her,
Her fingers playing the piano on your skin
Only the melodies you’ve created together.
With each press of a key
I can almost hear them.
Jennifer Mar 2018
so as i listen to Andrea Gibson on repeat, i know that it is for you.
i also know that you still think of me, like PTSD my car comes crashing into your thoughts and wrecks all your beliefs about her.
Jennifer Feb 2019
In the morning we will forget, so I put the blue drink to my lips, gazed into your green eyes and felt the icy drink trickle down my throat;
The alcohol only burns if you think too hard so I focused on the deafening music that seemed to engulf us.
Your fingers lingered on the table for a moment and I am reminded that something so minuscule can also be sensual.
My mind, although inebriated, cautions me that these feelings will only last for a short while because in the morning we will forget;
But I wake up
and your face
It is etched into my temporal lobe,
my brain a broken record, replays pieces of the night before;
My fingers clumsily interlocking with yours,
My fingers clumsily interlocking with yours,
My fingers clumsily interlocking with yours...
The upward turn of your lips creating a spot light and burning my face, I had to swear to you I wasn’t blushing.
And with the smell of the sea radiating from your chest,
I think to myself maybe one day I can join you on a voyage of the world, but one can only get so lucky.
So until then I’m off to bed once more hoping that in the morning
I’ll forget.
Jennifer May 2018
like standing on a train station waving goodbye to a lover,
we let go of time and watch each other fade into the past;
memories fly by as I meet the lonely caboose,
another lovely end.
Jennifer Jun 2017
Staring at the moles on your chest, I began to create constellations.
These dots are what remain in my mind as I try to forget the color of your eyes.
Jennifer Aug 2019
like living in a dream, I’m constantly running for a finish line I’ll never reach
Jennifer Jan 2019
Football, church, bikes, and friends;
“I finally have it all,” he said.
“I can look at my past and know it is not my future
My family loves me and I can say it now too.
I’ve experienced pain you will never know and I’ve lost a friend, something I’ll never let go.
But I cannot change the past, or my parents.
I can only change me, I will change my future and become the person I’m truly supposed to be”
Jennifer Jul 2018
you haven’t changed
not as far as I can tell
you still look pretty in your pony tail
you’re still witty and you still laugh
how lucky she was to see you like that
we will never be love
Jennifer Jan 2019
Show me your dark side, not so I can join it, but so I can show you mine too.
H
Jennifer Jun 2021
H
They say good girls like bad guys,
But good girls only like the guys with abuse in their eyes.
The good girls only want to please those that can’t be pleased;
It’s a mission only with no intent to succeed
not always, but sometimes
Jennifer Apr 2017
I found something magical in the light of your eyes;
It was radiant and strong,
So warm and so bright that it burned my eyes, as if I were staring at the sun itself,
But I did not turn away, I did not shade my face and hide from it.
I lurched out and grasped it, feeling its warmth on my fingertips;
For I was not afraid anymore because it was hope that I found in your eyes.
Jennifer Mar 2020
A worrisome traveler struggling to find their way out of the abyss;
I carry the weight heavy on my shoulders.
Jennifer May 2018
You keep pulling at my heartstrings;
Playing them like your favorite songs.
Hang from them like you hang from trees
and make an adventure out of hurting me.
murphy's law
Jennifer Nov 2018
Like an unfinished coloring page, your life is not over
It is not done, you are not finished.
She
Jennifer Apr 2017
She
She, is the image of childhood boy crushes’,
Powerful in all that is her own.
She, is the definition of beauty;
Humble and unaware of her strength.
She, is the outcome of parents who love the scabs left on their skin, more than they love the very things they created.
Her eyes, that which remind me of spring, are fogged with cigarette smoke and glazed with the reality, that this, is normal.
Her mind is not occupied by gossip and ubiquitous laughter, but drowning in the thoughts of her mother;
Haunted by the question that is seeping through the hole in her soul created by the threatening gun shots of her father, “Is she even alive?”
Wanting nothing more than affection, showing it, through rejection.
She is a victim of ****** abuse, letting her fears be known by being terrified to walk hand in hand with a man.
She is eleven, and although her past is nothing but pain and misery, I know that her future is wider than the oceans in which she used to play;
Her dreams are bigger than the waves that came crashing down only to knock her over like a domino, for she has always been able to stand back up.
Jennifer Nov 2018
You said my skin was soft
But your touch is softer
I want to lie down in an empty bed and fill your empty arms
After 5 long years I finally walked out of one door and straight into yours
How badly I want to call this door home
Take your heavy heart and let me carry all it’s weight on my shoulders
For it was you who
Opened up my heart again
It was you
Who made me feel something again
It was you
Who made me forget all the things I didn’t want to remember
So when you say my skin is soft
Remember
It’s because your touch was softer
Can you feel my heart racing?
Jennifer Apr 2017
I know that it is just words,
And I know that it's just a screen,
And I know it is just a person,
And I know how what they say makes me feel.
But what I don't know,
Is how to find the words to say I'm sorry,
Or how to fix my broken pieces,
Or to fix my heart strings,
But just a stranger, calling me an angel, was enough.
Jennifer May 2018
write me into your solar system,
tell me I look like the stars;
the same ones you fall in love with every night.
but instead, gaze at my heart and fall in love with me.
Jennifer Nov 2018
Over thinking is creating a disaster that wasn’t there in the first place.
It consumes not just your mind, but your body too.
Ever since I saw her face,
I barely even think about you.
But now I’m creating a disaster that wasn’t there in the first place,
For two nights, we cuddled and we kissed,
She won’t even text me now and all my mind does is race.
Jennifer Nov 2018
You don’t utter passionate words and send love letters,
But silence and empty responses.
And now you leave me wondering,
What little answers you have to speak.
What walls do you have up and why?
Can we talk for a while, over some coffee?
There’s just so much more to you than there seems.
“words can sting like anything but silence breaks the heart“
Jennifer Nov 2018
But your name is just another love poem I continue struggling to write
Jennifer Apr 2018
open my book and rip out my pages;
help me rewrite the story I have yet to perfect.
Jennifer Jun 2018
And on the last day,
like the final puzzle piece,
you disappeared and left me searching
Jennifer Aug 2018
teach me how to love from a distance so my body that’s aching to help can stop crumbling in their ungrateful hands
loving you less might have been the sweetest gift I could have given myself
Jennifer Jan 2022
I caught fireflies that escaped from your jar and used them to relight the room I’d kept dark,
But those too eventually lost their light leaving nothing but a vague glow of what could have been and a remembrance of why the room was dark in the first place
Jennifer Nov 2019
let us learn about the building blocks of our love;
just let our atoms collide
find me in the plana
Jennifer Jun 2018
And for a moment I was able to taste those sweet lips over shared chapstick
Jennifer May 2020
although we never will,
i wish we could be
Jennifer Mar 2018
I am infatuated with how your face lights up when you smile.
I can’t stop thinking about how your eyes shine like emerald and your voice travels like candy;
How I want to taste those sweet words rolling off your lips.
I want to feel your heartbeat against my chest, better yet, in my ears while I listen to it skip a beat as I lean in to kiss you.
I want to sleep next to you but in the most innocent sense of the word;
Tangled up in your arms and in your bed, enjoying the simple thought of you.
I keep starting with I, but all I can think about is you.
You are so unknowingly beautiful, it drives me crazy to know you don’t think you’re a *** of gold, shining at the end of my rainbow.
You help me find confidence and help stabilize my trembling fingers.
You give me the heart racing, voice trembling butterflies you only see in movies, finding hope in happy endings.
Though, for some reason, I can’t put my tongue on the exact reason why it’s you.
Sometimes souls just connect and create something beautiful, and god I hope that ours keep doing just that.
"and I'll be dreaming of the next time we can go into another serotonin overflow"
Jennifer Oct 2018
trembling all while I think about leaving you,
oh but how freeing it seems to be too.
i miss your touch; i miss the feeling,
but i can’t have any of it just staring at the ceiling.
i often think it’s time to go separate ways,
but then my head is fogged by this love, this haze,
yet tonight i don’t know that our love will last,  
so goodbye,
this is yours truly,
a lover from the past.

— The End —