She stood in the doorway looking at the girl in front of her.
A broken girl, life drained from her eyes.
Hands gripping tight onto a teddy bear,
mascara running down and scarring her perfect pale skin.
Perfect pink lips parted but not making a sound and yet...
letting free a scream of anguish.
Desperately crying out for help.
She stepped closer and so did the broken girl, their movements so perfectly synchronized.
"I hear you. I feel your pain." Said they simultaneously.
She reached out to touch the cheek of this girl, so similar and yet unrecognizable, and so too the girl reached for her cheek.
Her hand met glass in the place of warm skin.
Slowly she brought her hand to her cheek
and felt the warm wetness of her tears.
She then realized that poor, broken girl was a reflection of herself and softly whispered,
"This isn't how it was meant to be...I just wanted to be accepted. I never knew I'd be so unhappy being someone other than me."

A lonely little girl sits on the floor
back to the door
waiting for her parents to come home.
It has been three months since she last arrived
at the orphanage, she feels love deprived.
The other kids make fun of her,
she knows she doesn't belong here.
All she wants is to be wanted by someone
somewhere.

Years pass on and she's finally seventeen
still at the same home but living in between reality and her imaginary world.
That hole in her chest grew larger every year
but now she has someone to hold dear.
She's not alone anymore.
Oh, he's as sweet as can be
and she's thinking,
"He is the perfect one for me!"
All she has ever wanted was to be wanted.

He's broken her heart,
tore her world apart.
Pulled her back into reality.
She became so lonely.
Upon turning eighteen she had to leave
but she had nowhere to go.
It was a harsh winter
and the snowy ground became her grave.
The world told her she wasn't wanted
so she gave up and left.

I'm just trying to stay strong
Everything seems to be going wrong.
He doesn't come around here anymore
Ever since the day he walked right out of the door.
Now the nights grow longer
And I'm not getting any stronger.
Everything is dark
And I'm just waiting for that spark
To light up my world again
But I know, yes I know, it's never coming back to me.
My feelings show so plainly
All my pain on display.
I can't stay here anymore
Now it's my turn to walk out of the door
And into my empty infinity.

"Goodbye."

My heart explodes.
Clutching my chest in pain, I sink to my knees before you.
My lips part in a silent scream as you walk away.
NO PLEASE! I want to cry.
Darkness envelopes my being
tinged red with crimson tears.
I'm so weak.
You're out of my sight
and I'm trying to salvage the pieces of my heart.
I get cut with every piece I retrieve,
it's filled with your memory.
That night in the trees,
That evening downtown...
I want to beg you to turn around,
to come back to me.
I open my mouth to speak
and hear nothing but silence...

I have faced the days of danger
Even faced the gates of hell
So why is it so difficult
When I try and face myself

I can't even look in the mirror
Fearing what I may find
Will it be me,
Or the demons I harbor inside?

Is it my soul that cries out for justice
Or the inner depth that wants to be fed
It's hard to tell in this moment of silence
As the white noise screams inside of my head

What once was wrong is now right
And I'm losing the fight
For control of my own mind
Every day I'm changing into something I don't like.
I need to face myself and confront the monsters within,
I cannot ignore them,
To ignore them is to give in and let them win

Perhaps it's not myself that I'm afraid to face
But that which I was foolish enough to create
That part of me that I don't care to see
That part of me that I can't help but hate

My heart pounds loudly
I pray it won't give me away.
My breathing comes out in small pants,
adrenaline pumps in my veins.
This thing I do every Friday night,
lord, it gives me such a fright
but such a thrill.
My window creaks as I hop out into the night,
I look around to see if anyone else is in sight.
I walk away and glance around.
It just won't do if I'm found.
My secret sneaking is dangerous
for on these nights I meet my lover.