I think I found the one
but which one did I find?
so far this fairytale's plot
is at once upon a time
feels like I'm back at 4 years old
with my sleep on hold
waiting with bated breathe
to see how this story unfolds
this is one of those road trips
where the phrase "Are we there yet?"
will never come from my lips
because this trip is about the journey
and I am in no hurry
As a child I used to go and catch butterflies
but now I catch them
every time I look into her eyes
I not trying to be Kraft Mac-n-Cheezy
But I'm falling for her deeply
all I know is
ONCE I feel her embrace, mind body and soul, and  
UPON seeing her smile and hearing her laughter  
A blanket of her warmth tucks me in, filling my holes making it    
TIME to say happily ever after

I want to write a poem,
But there's not much to write about
It's four in the morning,
My eyes droop heavily as I type,
I'm exhausted, and worn out
But that's on my own account,
stay up all night, sleep all day,
A teenagers sleep cycle,
I always fight to stay awake,
But it's a battle I rarely win

I can't remember the last time i had a real smile.
I lost it somewhere back in 2007.
It hitched a ride on the back of someone's fist and was gone for good,
ran out on me, like a linebacker for the pro's.
I have a smile, i made.
I found some superglue, and some matchsticks, and held it together with my eyes.
I used it to describe the way i wanted people to see me.
It was like a stretched piece of gauze,
because the original scars still cracked through,
and i didn't want people to see,
the real me.
I carry this smile with me everywhere i go,
It's only for public use,
at other times, i hide it away in the kitchen drawer,
with the bills, and important letters,
that i will deal with,
one day.
I sometimes wonder what happened to that smile.
Is it coming  back?
Is it taking a holiday?
Is it teaching me a lesson?
Is it fighting through the hard times to get to me, desperately?
Is it waiting until it is, well deserved?
But still, i guess, i will keep the glue,
as this one seems to be working,
and no-one seems to notice,
the difference.
And i appreciate that its not easy to be a faker,
but at least when you get so good,
you don't really remember who you really are.
And that's really ok,
because no-one needs to find that out anyways,
when you become what you believe,
and find it really does come true.

I'm not stuck dad, I'm moving forward.
You just don't approve of anything I do that's worth being proud of.

Sink into me.
Breathe slowly.
We'll burn the clocks
and drink our music.
Rest your wandering feet.
I've built you this home
of bone and song
and wrapped it in my skin.
Tell me your heart can beat for me.
Sink into me
until we forget all our fences.

if i have ever learned anything
"don't look back"
is the one
that would serve me best
if i let it.

but things aren't easy like that
humans can't just let the burning city rest
they have to turn around,
check
that it's
leaving
see if
anyone's still breathing.

the poor ******* that second guess
are the ones who don't get blessed
you've failed the easiest test,
red
now you're in trouble
again

sometimes i can hear my thoughts,
as if someone were laying next to me,
speaking.

and the things this person says to me,
doesn't let me sleep much,
anymore.