The fallen angels call to me reminding me who I am,
They try to bring me back into their world but I’ve gotten free.
Because I found my wings and I’m flying high,
I am now over the sea.

Don’t come for me,
I am too far gone.
Don’t try to follow,
You won’t last long.

I can hear the fallen angels sing,
Whispering words of fear,
And I don’t want to listen,
But I still hear.

Don’t come for me,
I am too far gone.
Don’t try to follow,
You won’t last long.

The fallen angels stand silent waiting for me to fall,
They want to remind me why I was one of them.
A broken girl,
They want to see condemned.

Don’t come for me
I am too far gone
Don’t try to follow
You won’t last long

I worked hard to get where I am.
These wings of mine are very strong,
They beat with the power of freedom,
Somewhere the fallen angels don’t belong.

Don’t come for me
I am too far gone
Don’t try to follow
You won’t last long

Don’t come for me
I am too far gone
Don’t try to follow
You won’t last long

You said we were going to be together.
You said that nothing could break us apart.
Now you say that this was never right
Now I am left living a lie.

I am on my knees begging for this pain (to be over).
Standing on my doorstep late at night (fully broken).

How could this have not been right?
How could you let me live a lie?
How could I have trusted you?
And how could I ever get over you?

You promised that you would never leave me.
You promised we could make it through everything.
Now you say that you need to go.
Now I am left here all alone.

I am on my knees begging for this pain (to be over).
Standing on my doorstep late at night (fully broken).

How could you promise me something untrue?
How could you leave me alone that night?
How could I have believed in you?
And how could I ever get over you?

You never meant for this to go this far.
You never meant for me to fall this hard.
You didn’t see this coming.
You didn’t stop to think.
You didn’t care to tell me I didn’t mean a thing.

And now I am on my knees begging for this pain (to be over).
Standing on my doorstep late at night (fully broken).

Even though I know I deserve better.
I still loved you more than ever.

I am on my knees begging for this pain (to be over).
Standing on my doorstep late at night (fully broken).
Just wishing for this night to get over.
Waiting for the wounds to heal over.
Watching for the rising sun.
For I was nothing but a long con.

To lose your heart,
To save a life.
To know the truth,
But tell only lies.

You look at me with that sadness in your eyes.
The look that makes it hard not to cry.
The pain is still fresh like it happened yesterday.
And I know there is nothing I can say but this...
Just remember her, remember her smile.
Remember her laugh and the way she danced.
Just remember her, let her memory last.

What happened to the pure of heart?
Where did they all go?
The innocent have all but gone.
They aren't in this world any more.

They left us with greed and cowardice.
Streets washed red with blood.
Of life and love there is none.

It's one man for himself.
They stand on the front line,
But there is no physical enemy on the other side.

Where did the strong of spirit go?
Do they not still live?
Is chivalry really dead?
Or is it in hiding again?

We are left in a pit of darkness.
Where hope is all but none.

But wait!
There is a light, so bright that it nearly blinds.
The light is warm and beautiful, where love and hope shine.

There is a man who is holding out His hand.
"Please, come and take it. I will free you from this land."

So we take His hand and walk with Him.
Away from this place.
To somewhere so beautiful no description can name.

"Welcome home, my child." He spoke with a smile so bright.
And for the first time we are safe in Heaven's light.

I hate the way you look at me.
You look at me like I'm worthless, nothing.
You see someone who shouldn't be.
A disgrace, a broken dream.
Someone you never wanted, someone who couldn't be.
The blood in my veins doesn't matter to you.
I'm not the son you wanted to live through.
You've crushed my heart and shattered my dreams.
I've tried all my life to gain your love,
But all the things I've ever done,
They mean nothing to you, nothing at all.
You see a failure, the reason to fall.

What are you running from?
What do you think you’ll find?
When the battles lost,
And there’s no place to hide.
Do you think you can,
Stand up in the end?
When all time has stopped,
And all hope has died.

What if you lose your heart?
What if you fall apart?
When the world lies,
And you’re left to cry.
Do you think you can,
Stand up in the end?
When the fight is lost,
And your strength is gone.

What if you found you had been betrayed?
What if you could never fix it?
When everyone you loved walks away,
And you can’t pick up the pieces.
Do you think you can,
Stand up in the end?
When you know everything is gone,
And you are left all alone.

What are you going to do?
What are you going to say?
When you’re at the end of the line,
And you’re running out of days.
Do you think you can,
Stand up in the end?
When time gives out,
And you’ve gone cold.

I wish I could look into your eyes and see them reflecting back at me.
I wish I could hear you voice saying my name to me.
I wish I could tell you I loved you so much.
Just so I knew you understood that I loved you.
I wish I could take your place.
I wish I could change fate.
I wish I had one more chance,
To hold you in my arms again.
I miss your laugh.
I miss your smile.
I miss your voice and how you’d walk.
Every step you took had me mesmerized.
The way you could never tell a lie.
Every day I breathe.
Every day I dream.
Every day I pray I can make it through.
Every day I miss you.
You had this quite strength.
You had this wicked wit.
You followed through on everything.
I never once saw you quit.
Even when you faced the end.
I never saw you quit.

I miss her so much.
The beat of her heart.
The sound of her feet,
Running across the yard.
She was so beautiful, so smart
The loss of a child,
Can break any heart.
No parent should ever have to bury their child.
But it happens far too often.
That thought is just vile!
One wonders how anyone can ever smile.
When someone so young is gone.
She shone so bright,
And loved so much.
Now I am left at a loss.
I don’t know what to do.
I don’t know how to live,
Without my sunshine,
I don’t know how to give.
I swear the world lost its light,
The day my sweet girl died.

He never got to see your eyes light up when you laughed.
He never saw the adoring look when he came home at last.
He’ll never get to know you the way I do.
Because you’re gone
The angels took you too young.

He was never at your games and he never taught you how to ride.
He’ll never get to teach you how to drive.
He never knew what he meant to you
He never got to see all that you could do.
Because you’re gone
The angels took you too young.

I wish he could have seen the man you would have become.
You were so strong and kind.
You had such a bright mind.
But it ended so soon.
And you were gone so fast.
And I could never forgive him for not being here,
When we needed him the most.
I know it’s not his fault.
But it haunts me like a ghost.
Because you’re gone,
The angels took you too young.

So here I am standing at your doorway
Waiting for you to let me in.
So I can take back the things I said.
I never really meant to hurt you.
I just lost sight of what you mean to me.
So here I am to say I’m sorry.
Here I am to say I love you.
Here I am hoping we can fix what I broke.
Here I am again.

The days go by and I’m trying,
To fix what I have done.
Because the words I said were hateful.
The words I said were wrong.
So here I am to say I’m sorry.
Here I am to say I love you.
Here I am hoping we can fix what I broke.
Here I am again.

I find that I am losing you all over again.
I find that I can’t simply take back what I said.
I hurt you too bad this time,
And I realize I went too far to get you back.
So here I am to say I’m sorry.
Here I am to say I love you.
Here I am hoping we can fix what I broke.
Here I am again.

I stand at the end of all I’ve done.
Knowing there is nothing to be won.
Your heart is no longer mine.
You are gone forever this time.
So here I am to say I’m sorry.
Here I am to say I love you.
Here I am knowing I lost you.
Here I am again living without you.

Tears in the laughter
Tragedy abounds
Healing though memories
Both silly and profound
A love though three generations
From great to grand.

We miss you so much
The smell of cigarettes haunts my memories
Floods me with times never to be lost
I regret not spending more time with you
Not taking you in when I had you.

There is an emptiness
A hole where you should be
We laugh and joke
It helped us grieve
But every holiday I close my eyes and wish you were here with me.

I think, no, I know you are proud of us
The way we stay so strong
Together we are whole
Together we belong.

I am thankful we have you forever captured on screen
Whenever I need to hear your voice it’s there
I can laugh at how silly you are
I feel you here with me
Just seeing you
Hearing you
Makes it bearable.

It’s been four years now
Four years since that day and the pain still hasn’t fully gone away

I could never forget you
For Tenino is your town
I love that people know you
Your name gets around.

I love you, Grandma Monk
You are so very important to me.

I poured my heart in a letter that you never read.
You keep it on your nightstand beside your bed.
Someday you’ll regret not reading what it said.
But by then I’ll be dead.

The life that I once had,
Was taken from me in a flash.
This disease spread far too fast.
You feel a guilt that is too strong.
Because you were too late,
Now I am gone.

I waited to hear what you would say.
But I never saw you after that day.
Fate decided that you and I could never be.
Fate decided to end my life early.

As I lay there dying,
You ran across my mind.
I wonder what I did,
If I crossed a line.
 
As I lay here broken,
Tears fall from my eyes.
You will not be here.
As I start to die.

I have no anger toward you.
I wish I could say goodbye.
But you choose to let me go.
So I’ll leave you as I die.

My last few thoughts are not of you,
For that is more then you deserved.
No, I left with a feeling of love.
A feeling you did not return.

I have no regrets when it comes to loving you.
But not living until it was late,
Was a struggle to get through.
But one must not fight fate.
And when it’s time to go,
I leave with a free heart.
One you didn’t know.

Hey, girl why are you so sad.
I know you fell so hard.
And you don’t know how to get back,
To what you had before.
Your broken dreams have shattered like glass.
And you don’t know how to face your past.

I know it seems impossible
But you can try
To pick yourself up and fly
On broken wings.

You found that you have no faith in anyone.
So tired of being someone you’re not.
Lies were all he left you.
Truths you’ll never find.
Then there were the tears you cried.

I know it seems impossible
But you can try
To pick yourself up and fly
On broken wings.
 
Your broken heart can’t heal.
So you decide not to feel.
You need to remember what it was like to dream.

I know it seems impossible
But you can try
To pick yourself up and fly
On broken wings.

Breathing set you free
To fly with your broken wings.
You look forward to living your dreams
Now that you learned to fly on broken wings.

You know it’s not impossible
Because you tried
You picked yourself up and flied
On broken wings.

Now healing wings…

I’ve been waiting, waiting for you,
Wanting you,
Needing you,
Come find me.

And I’ll run, run into your arms,
Hold me close, protect me.
Stay, stay with me,
Save me from the dark.

As the tears fall from my eyes,
I wonder why, why I hurt.
Breathing is a tricky thing.
Come find me.

And I’ll run, run into your arms,
Hold me close, protect me.
Stay, stay with me,
Save me from the dark.

Darkness pulls me in.
Going under, under the surface.
Drowning in the dark.
Come find me.

And I’ll run, run into your arms,
Hold me close, protect me.
Stay, stay with me,
Save me from the dark.

Please, please find me.
I’m losing hope.
My strength is failing.
Come find me.

And I’ll run, run into your arms,
Hold me close, protect me.
Stay, stay with me,
Save me from the dark.

I’ll close, close my eyes.
Lie down, sleep now.
Can’t wait any longer.
Please find me.

And you’ll run, run for me.
Hold me close, protect me.
Stay, stay with me,
As I breathe my last breath in the dark.

Hey baby girl, let your light shine bright.
You precious creature,
You know I love you, right?
My shooting star,
Light the world on fire with how beautiful you are.

Hey precious child,
You beautiful thing.
You are so smart,
You could do anything.

Oh my angel, I love you so.
Your sparkle makes my day.
Your heart so pure,
Is forever my saving grace.
Your love so sure.

Princess of happy ever after,
You light up my life like a firecracker.
You are my joy though the sorrow.
Don’t you let that light fade.

Shine on my super star.
Show the world just who you are.
Proud to have you with me now.
Just wish you never have to grow up.

Sweetheart, you are all that’s good in me.
You make me a better person.
You are my dream.
You are my everything.

Go on, baby, show the world who you are.
Shine on with all your heart.
Don’t let them bring you down.
Don’t leave without a sound.

Hey little girl, with the smile so bright.
In the dark you make everything all right.
Your faith in people is a delight.
Your laugh is a source of light.

You once told me,
I was special.
That you would love me,
Forever after.

And I have to wonder,
What I saw in your eyes.
I am getting so tired.
Aren’t you sick of all the lies?

Are you ever going to see,
That my heart is so broken.
Because of what you’re doing to me,
I can’t feel anymore.

I looked into your eyes
And what I saw was something else.
I’ve broken all our ties.
And I’ll let you go,
But you need to know.

I’ll always love you.
I’ll never forget you.
But I can’t forgive you.
For making my world shatter.
And if I ever see you,
Standing with some other girl.
Just know it will hurt me.
Just know it will break me,
Further then when I first lost you.

The heart is a strange place to be.
I wonder what this could mean.
My undying love,
For someone who doesn’t truly love me.

I signed my heart away.
Watched the last part of me die away.
Finding you so happy.
Makes it hard to breathe.

What did I do that made you stop loving me?
Was it even me that caused the love to end?
All I know is.

I’ll always love you.
I’ll never forget you.
But I can’t forgive you.
For making my world shatter.

Easily broken, slowly repaired.
Hearts and promises are like glass.
Sometimes they shatter too fast.
He promised to love me.
Told me he cared.
But one day I turned around but he wasn’t there.
He left his ring on the table.
And my heart is in pieces.
My eyes are unfocused.
Tears blurring my sight.
I wonder if I did something wrong,
But was it right?
I learned something that day.
The day he left me.
The words that no one has dare spoken.
That hearts and promises are like glass...so easily broken.


Credit to Dustyn Smith for coming up with “hearts and promises are like glass... easily broken.”

A companion to Dean**


The weight is placed on your shoulder.
Long before the world grew colder.
You are your father’s daughter.
Before you failed your brother.


Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.


Made to raise your little brother.
But when he was taken along with your mother.
The responsibly that went unspoken.
Now has left your heart so broken.


Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.


You believe it’s all your fault.
The thought makes you halt.
Afraid to play your part.
And you’re worried you’ve lost your heart.


Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.


Coming to the end of your rope.
Heading down a slippery *****.
Can’t listen to what you need to hear.
All you know is fear.
Starting to feel weak.
Not getting any sleep.
The nightmares haunt you.
Hoping you can make it through.


Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.


Don’t give up on me now.
You can make it through somehow.
Please just take my hand,
I can help you stand.


Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.

I can see the strength in your eyes is getting weak.
Trying to keep alive is becoming quite the feat.
You have so much weight placed on your shoulders.
Forced to grow up a little older.
Left your childhood behind too soon.
There was nothing left for you to do.

Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.

The sweet innocence that once burned so bright,
Is gone with all of its light.
That burden you carry around,
Will someday bring you down.
If only you would take my help.

Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.
 

You don’t have to go in alone.
You can always come home.
I will be here when you call.
I will catch you when you fall.

Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new day has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.

I know that trust doesn’t come to you easy.
And asking for help makes you uneasy.
But that façade you keep,
The one that leaves everyone out of reach,
Is what will bring you to your knees.
If only you could be free.

Just hold on.
The sun is soon rising.
A new has come.
Breathe deep and carry on.

He packed his bags and never looked back, so they say.
But his little girl remembers it differently.

Did you know that she prayed everyday for you to come home?
Did you know she would stay up late and wait for you to walk through the door?
Did you know she still believes in you?
Did you know?

Her mother told her he was never coming home,
But she still had hope even four years down the road.
She's still waiting....

Did you know that she prayed everyday for you to come home?
Did you know she would stay up late and wait for you to walk through the door?
Did you know she still believes in you?
Did you know?

She no longer asks when daddy's coming home.
Now she wonders why he choose to go...

When it rains, it pours down on this life of mine.
I was lost and you found me,
All broken inside.
It wont be the first time that I wish she were here.
And it wont be the last time I scream and no one hears.

As my eyes grow heavy, sleep will surly come.

Let’s sing the songs of angels as I lay my body down.
And my mind will dream of only good things.
Sleeping without a sound.

Lord, lay me down to sleep.
If I die before I wake.
I pray my soul you’ll take.
And let those I leave behind,
See the light in the darkness,
Feel peace at night when they rest their heads.
Dream of only good things.

Let the sunshine on the day they lay me to rest,
Let the beauty of the world make them feel less.

And let's sing the songs of angels as I lay my body down.
And my mind will dream of only good things.
As I go without a sound.

Please don't give up on the sound of goodbye.
Let me know that you're leaving so I don't cry.

If you don't love me, just go right now.
Stop playing your games, thinking I can take it somehow.
At least tell me the truth, so I don't have to pretend that I'm OK.

Please don't give up on the sound of goodbye.
Let me know that you're leaving so I don't cry.

When you close the door it won't open again.
If this love isn't real then I'll seal my heart from you.

Peel back the layers of what went wrong.
Was it ever right at all?

Please don't give up on the sound of goodbye.
Let me know that you're leaving so I don't cry.

I'll know it's not my fault, but yours.
You are the one who choose to walk out the door.

I know the secrets you keep locked inside.
The tears, the pain, all the lies.
And when I think you’ll let me in.
I realize you’re not alive.

Of all the things I thought were true.
I thought I could be with you.
Now I see the truth,
You’re not alive.

You’ve died so much inside.
You think you have to hide.
And when I think you’ll let me in.
I realize you’re not alive.

You’re died inside.
I’ve tried to find what you hide inside.
Full of lies.
But you’re not alive.

Often I wonder if you even know my name.

Or am I just someone you bring in from the rain?

Sometimes I speak and you don’t hear me.

And it breaks my heart wondering if it’s worth having a voice.

Am I given a choice?

To choose to live without you,

Or live a fake life.

The choice is clear but harder than you think.

I’ve lived so long with you.

That our end can’t possibly be here.

How could you be so blind to me?

How could you not realize that I was bleeding?

How could you be so cold?

How could you not know?

That I love you.

How can you blame me for being who I am?

To try to strip me of all I am.

As I fall down, the darkness pulls me under.
Trying to drown, me in this crazy sea.

Won't someone come and save me,
from this life, that I lead.
Hold me close, as the world ends.

I can't see the light, at the end of the tunnel.
Going under, the darkness pulls me down.
Fighting just to remember, life before,
I lost myself.

Won't someone come and save me,
from this life, that I lead.
Hold me close, as the world ends.

I'm losing this battle, with my soul.
Trying to fight for this freedom,
That I can't hold.

Flashes of lightning, sounds of thunder.
I have to wonder, why did this happen to you?

What did I do?
To cause the love to shatter,
Like broken glass we scatter.

Won't someone come and save me,
from this life, that I lead.
Hold me close, as the world ends.

Words can't say how sorry I am.
To go back and change it again.
But I can't change who I am.

Fighting hard to stay sober,
As my blood runs colder.
The future is open and closed.
I just pray I have hope.

Won't someone come and save me,
from this life, that I lead.
Hold me close, as the world ends.

How can you pretend?
That nothing matters.
Hid behind the lies.
That no one cares.
Go about invisible.
Screaming to be seen.
Needing to be seen.

Cant find the light.
In this darkness.
Cant win this fight.
Slowly losing.
Giving up faith.
Of being heard.
Always hurt.

Just to be alive.
Sometimes isn't enough.
All the lies.
Fall from your mouth.
Loneliness.
Is a disease.
All consuming.
Cant be free.

Closed off, divided.
Separate, fighting.
A warning, shouted.
Time stops, hearts pounding.
Another, one, falls.
A mother, a father.
A sister, a brother.
Another, one, falls.
A heart stops, pounding.
The battle, is fought.
They answered, the call.
Faith is, a struggle.
To fight or, to follow.
Sound, the, call.
Stand on, the front lines.
Wait for, the signal.
This, is, war.
Tomorrow, today.
Always, the same.
Another, one, falls.
The enemy, is coming.
Fear is, abounding.
Time, is, gone.
Whose side, are you on?
Flee or, follow?
This, is, War.

Silver tape over my mouth,
The silence is stretching.
Even with the tape off
You never heard me,
Just someone in the background.
Half of me hates this,
The other doesn't care.
If I walk away,
It's like I was never there.
Was I there?
Standing here waiting to be seen,
To be heard!
Is that so wrong?
Is that too much?
I ask you to see me,
To see who I can be.
The person you want,
The person you need.
You just need to listen.
Listen to me!
I strip off the silver tape
And walk away.
Refusing to watch
The world slip away.

This is for everyone who lost a child, a friend, or a partner/spouse.**



In another life you are still here.

Your just as beautiful as the day I first held you.

Now your safe from harm, cradled in God's arms.

But in another life I am holding you.



In another life your laughing.

Your smile is just as bright as the first time we shared a laugh.

Now your an angel soaring with the clouds.

But in another life I am laughing with you.



In another life you and I are one.

Your just as charming as the day I met you.

Now your watching over me, while I live without you.

In another life I am with you.



And in another life there is no pain,

No loss of loved ones, no moving on, no blame.

But in this life where I am.

I'll live without you the best I can.

I know you were the star of this story,

I was the extra in your scenes.

When the world turned to gray,

I knew it was because you went away.



You were the soccer player, I was your cheer leader,

You made me want to be a better player on life's field.



I hope that I told you, I can't remember if I did.

How much you meant the world to me,

I looked up to you even though you are younger then me.

Your light is a beacon to a quiet, lonely girl.

Your friendship made me stronger, enough to face the world.



You are the laughter in the wind, the sun in the rain.

You are the smile through to tears, the beauty in the pain.



Today I will grieve you, in the future I will see you.

Till that day arrives I'll keep you in my life.

Hold you in my heart and remember you in my dreams.

And pray for those you left to live on with their days.