I come unstuck when it seems
That my influence
is not enough
and solution is the job at hand.
When I don’t have an answer
And can only be me
And all that I see
Are boxes
And clouds
Floating in my mind
Unattached and
Drifting
Lost in thought
And a whisper in the wind.
I am of whim and fancy
And fleet passing thoughts
That mean the world to me
Free and flotsam
Ebbing
Then crashing
And bits and pieces of me
Wash up along the shore
To be picked up and carried
Like bounty and wealth
And good health
Clasped
Tight delight
Within a treasured chest.
I crash and thrash
Each day
I pray
That I can be
For you
For me
A lighthouse
Tall and proud
A beacon in the dark
When my presence is the essence of the solution.

You are a jigsaw boy
A piece amongst pieces
Like chess,
A token on a board
Are you the pawn boy?
Or just the Queen
Dressed up like a King?
Makin’ moves
And grooved
You are worn
By time boy
Manhandled and played
Displayed
Like a ***
Of monopoly dollars
Dyed parchment
You are spent
However
You are classic
And everlasting
Boy.

Little kitten
i would have your
purr
and bristle fur
inside of you
i'd be lion
strong
And you could scratch
and cut
and use me as your
post.
And i would drink you
up
up up
my tongue my throat
a
vestibule in time
catching and licking and suckin
and taking you in
sublime.
All fluid and raw flesh and blood
My hunger for you is feline *** canine
Bloodthirst, this urge
this roar
inside of me
for you.
Animal intent
I am your awakening,
the ache to your throb
you pulse through my veins
and i want to be taken
in your claws.

You are not submissive
and i am not Domme
but you'd melt in my paws.
Up high
Against a wall
i would carry you on my shoulders
your back against the wall
and drink and breathe and become your flesh
from within you i'd break and re-mould
and detail the design of your love
for me.

I would be your strength
embodied
a boy of flesh
of depth
of passion
of friendship
fashioned intrinsically
with love and
Oneness.

I can only be the only one.

I feel a familiar wave
Of apathy
Washing, creeping, aching
over me
That self propelled
Ignorant kind of numb admission
That reaches into the bleeding
redness
Of your heart
And wraps black
Stained greyscale
Morbid pale
fingers around the
Aorta
Choking
Silencing
Encoding
A defence
Repeated
Completed time and again
Pre worn
And cut up
And burnt
like a leather
Shield, a muddied bloodied field
War ready



This is a Mexican stand off
Where the pistols
Pull their own pins
This is a temple
Unforgiving of sins.

I can hear a call
For help echoing
Through the death grip
Of regularity
But the voice is familiar
And if I remember correctly
It fades after time.
The voice is mine
one of many
The cry is loud
But habits old are hard to break
And, after all, a rolling stone
Will gather no moss
moss ,enough I have already.
And with the ignorance comes
A steady.
And with the steady
There comes a surface calm.
And with that calm I can sit
At one in a room with myself
And not find cause to cry.
(despite the never ending, it will always be ok)

You know
I held you
I felt you
I wrapped you up
And unstitched my skin
With invisible scissors
For you to slip into
To imbue
Like glue
I stayed
steadfast and ready
I held on for dear life
Through your restless night
My feet contoured around yours
My arms a blanket in your dreams
Small brown birds
For hands
That fluttered
A delicate mess
Of visions
To loud for your
Eyes
closed
Your head in my shoulder
Body curled
You
So small
So big
Love
Needing
And me
So wanting
To be there
In truth
Consoling and Chaste.
I breathed you in
And presented my presence
Like never before
I opened a door
That then became dust
A shadowland trust
Forged dark in the dawn
Of y(our) sorrow.

I am cage fights with boys and girls alike
I am splintered hardwood floors
kneeling/crawling/hard working
indoor/outdoor
day/night.
I am balled fists
Open palms
I am Chains and
a footstool timbered from my back.
A rent boy with vices
I am violence/dicord/visceral
Bloodied and mean.
A machine built of sinew
made for binding/unbinding
lashing and flogging
I am a service receptacle
a boy built of honour
of instinctual intellect
of bruises and bandages
i am cut and torn
roped and worn.

Ribs
and pointy sticks
and scarlet ribboned
sanguine teeth
all down my side
they slide
from chest
to rib
they bite
from skin
to smile.
I itch and scratch
and nick and pick
and all the while
a supple
smile
licks
flavoured
at my lip.

Pretty as a picture
Gilled and arced
small crescents
and the presence
of an ornate touch.
So much
{silence} unsaid,
{sweat} unspent,
{sense} unfelt,

Choked and bound
skin ground
and breathing
beneath the blade.

Trussed
and
Trust

Etched seamless
strokes

Volatile,
then comes the
Calm.