To dare not tell the ones I dream of
That I do
Is to revoke a right they have earned.

You stuck in my brain,
The lot of you,
And it is my thoughts you now burn.

I feel guilty for withholding
so few words,
But I can't bring myself to speak.

The effects have lingered,
Their personalities
Every single one of them is unique.

I wake with their faces and
I stare at my phone.
These are just memories
That I can postpone.

I drew a heart on paper because
**** you can make it beat.
Really, you terrify me.

Eos was the titan of the dawn,
And that's where I am now,
Here at the beginning of my life,
Entering a healthier state,
Relying on myself.

The days are long in this summer hell,
Outside it burns like sulfur,
Never
Pleasing those who love the
Engulfing darkness.

Remember that I write to please myself
Because I don't care about the masses, I
Care
About
Us.

Silly
Excuses.

I have liquid in my lungs.
I know this because I can hear it, feel it.
I smell zucchini and cheese and all I want to do it kiss her
And tell her that the teal shirt she wore when we met
Still shows up in my dreams.

Every single day I ache
To call some place up there,
And order an orchid for your door.

I am reminded in my limp and my shrug
That I love you.
I am reminded in the fact that I would be willing to suffer nightmares every single night of my life
If only you slept next to me.

You smell like the woman I want to marry,
And your strong shoulders feel like the ones I want to see every morning
When you sit up on the bed.

I'm willing to go the distance.

I never told you that I loved you.

But none of them can be heard.

I smile more.
I laugh heartily.
I kiss and love.
I don't obsess.
I don't harm.
I am fit.
Physically.
Mentally.
Emotionally.

I read.
I play.
I drive.
I am free.
I am Marshall.
And by God,
*This feels good.

My teacher once said
That protagonists of novels
Are teenagers in a sense.
Commonly.

These characters are new to life,
But not brand new.
They take chances that wisers
Might not.

They steal things,
Have ***,
Feel hope.
Adults do not.

We all want to read about teenagers
Because teenagers remind us
That life can have a bright outcome
If your teen years set it up properly.

We throw our lives away,
Then spend the rest of it
Reading novels
*Wishing that we didn't.