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jackierutherford Sep 2015
Wait !
System crash
delete/re-send/enter

Lonely by default
social am i

Love to laugh, scream,talk
light a room afire
Puns of fun escapes my lips
eyes full with desire

Plugged in
no one looks up to see
who or what befriends them
jackierutherford Dec 2014
Drawn from experiences you bear
Men are not one to care, for strength in their women's demear
weaker ***, we are not !
having to be able to stand on the spot

Men have muscles ! we have brains
they hold strong !    we love fierce

Finding a man, we help him to build his life, his will
we toil for years, trying to bond
developing patterns as we travel along

Making our own history, hoping it last
through tribulations of fighting, cheating - aghast !
Life is good, you love; you laugh;
taking care of your household, forgiving the past

You have dreams of a nice, fine life
so, you work hard, building bridges; making cakes; washing;
cleaning; loving -
Then, out of the blue, he looks at you
It's not the same, what a shame ...

No more communications; no dinners set;
no more sleeping together - nothing,
to offset, the love or potential that you get
when there is love or respect

You fight, with all you have
this is the man you gave your heart ...
he is dead set, because of another
young, fresh, no regrets

It was tough, you burned, yearned
got depressed; fought the tears
the demons on your chest

Its been a year; long, hard year
he's set to go
so, you pick up your skirt
head for the door
jackierutherford Jul 2016
Hmm,
At first sight
I like ...
Our eyes met, we smiled
The feeling is mutual
I can tell

Didn't think it possible but
It happened
Just like that!
I'm hooked
My summer crush

I looked up
A hand came in view
It was him, looking straight in my eyes

I melted on the spot
Took his hand and squeezed
The cougar in me purred with delight

Ahh, it's real
Mon cheri - those eyes
Always roaming to find the other
Hoping no one notices

It's a mutual thing
To just be friends
Not to harm or offend

Feels good
We smile, secretively
Like old friends

Summer crush
Like ice
Sizzling hot
Hush ...
I don't even know his name

Copyright JRap /7/2016
jackierutherford Jan 2015
Do you know about unions ? The one with the bling ?
He pestered, begged, followed.
Flattered, I caved in.
After five years co-existing, we exchanged rings.

His mom was elated! She bought us things
Our dads were rigid with questions for him

I went for it - with crazy zest!
Feeling good, safe, not caring what's next

Just before saying yes, with seriousness,
I looked in his eyes - asking: Are you sure you want
to walk through this door?
Been there; done this before.
This was his ****** tour.

Close friends were upset, they thought we were rushing
Hell, we knew best.
Thinking after the fest, the road we were traveling
would lead to success!

Tying the knot (the rope that chokes)
we clutched each other. Smiles of tears in our eyes
Hearts thumping, blinded by tomorrow

That first night, with squeals of delight,
I was so happy! I couldn't stop grinning
and thinking - He chose me! (right?)
I'll love forever! Knee deep in glee

Foolish me. Didn't know what was in stow...
After six weeks of wedded bliss,
a tornado blew open the doors!

He bowled me over, with words hard to ponder...
"I don't want to be married anymore".
jackierutherford Oct 2016
Thanks to Hello Poetry for the recognition of the Daily for Mid-age Graduate.
Thanks for all the support from fellow poets .
JRap.
jackierutherford Feb 2016
Trinidad and Tobagonians
Haitians
Egyptians

Mexicans
English
Liechtensteins
T­urkish
Italians
Norwegians
Germans

Portuguese
Omanians
Tromelin Islanders

Orcas Islanders
French

African-Americans
Maldives
Ecuadorians
Romanian­s
Ice Landers
Chinese
Argentinas
jackierutherford Nov 2014
Unable to sing; dance; tap; play the piano; run a race or swim
I pick up a Pen and then ...

Words flow faster than the brain can go

Wanted to get an intervention of help
Which would have placed me in a world of debt

Thoughts are dense, heart heavy with worry
Can't spew out the words to another, even if I tried

Uncomfortable, embarrassed,
Feelings of stupidity - permeates my outer-self
But then;
My Pen -

The ink flows
I feel better
as I can let it all out on paper

Don't want your sorrow
Knowing there is a better tomorrow
This, is my hell
So I call upon the mighty power -
Of my Pen

There is therapy in the pen
It sets me free
Lightens the weight of my gait
Puts a smile in my eyes
And sunlight at my feet
self therapy is good for the soul, so i write
jackierutherford Dec 2014
I met a man by the name of Chris
bound to a wheelchair is he
smiling real white
with hair so thick
complexion as shining as he

With a quiet demeanor that's peaceful and cool
he rolls along in shorts and shades
listening to his I-Pad of tunes

He does not debate the fact of his fate
sipping red wine, looking real fine
savoring dark chocolate after his pate

Standing in his transforming scoot
he lives his life one day at a time
enjoying whatever may be
wasting no time fretting about
the silliest things in life
He reminds me that life is a treasure, enjoy every minute
jackierutherford Dec 2014
Un-care goes deep. Looking at that door.
I feel no more...
Who would believe, that just a short-time ago
there was joy in the air; laughter in the eyes; words of care

Seeing the regret in his eyes, the shift in his steps, the rigid chest.
Tears comes to my eyes. I can't believe...

Confused about the meanness
I looked with searching eyes
at the ebbing oneness,
leaking down the steps of the once thought love nest

Raising the question, of why ?

He pierced me with angry, empty eyes.
Why ?
All the reasons given, were nothing but lies and denials
He got what he wanted.
Years of emotional, devotions of love and ***
All the essence of my womanhood drained,
What's left ?

Tried to fight for that love we had
but for him; the hunt was over
I was left bruised and had
I fought and fought and fought some more
Nothing I did or said shaked his demure

He said he loved me, but was not "in love"
couldn't make promises anymore
He cringes at my touch
pulls away, and pushes every step of the way

I've come to terms with myself and the situation
My God, it's been months
turned into a year of Un-care

He retreats to his room
closes his door

I hate that door
UN-CARE
jackierutherford Sep 2015
When you KNOW you're right
and haven't done anything wrong

Pray & Fight -

Stand up to the Devil
it's your plight
Don't cower or hide
let out that pride
jackierutherford Sep 2015
Mind my own business
observe, listen
makes me learn
and see what others miss

They underestimate the quiet,
strong silence in the midst of their selves
jackierutherford Jul 2015
I'm a woman first -
can you hear me ?!
I am a woman - hear my cries:
look at me - not past me.

Why do you think I scream and holler!
That's because you seem blind to my wants and needs
If you only want cookies, don't move in and sponge off me

My make up, doesn't involve a break up
If you can't be man enough to uphold me -
don't trip up
keep it moving, boo

I am a woman, I am true
If you're with me
I take care of you

You're supposed to be strong,
what's wrong with you?

Take care of your woman -
even if you a dog, under cover
be good to the one you choose to live with

Women will come and go,
there's thousands of us.
Just be kind to the one that you were with
from the start -

that cleaned up your a** and got you on the move -
to bigger and better plateaus

I am woman
boo
jackierutherford Nov 2014
Born Jamaican, to a single mom
Watched her struggle, in that land
Day and night through stress and fears
She worked real hard building tiers

For years, she was our founding rock
Teaching, preaching, assuring with gust

Yeah, she complained
She's only human
That the man wasn't there,
to help us move onward

Now, I'm grown
Facing life
Mirror image of her past life
Struggled with my kids in kind

Hoping for a life devine

— The End —