Early on
it was clear
I was coming nowhere in this race
and so my eyes began to wander,
pick out the daisies in the grass,
note the sweep of the horizon
and -
stop.
A long time,
the thunder of feet
fading into the distance,
leaving breeze,
bees
and other tranquilities.

Until a small man
in a tight suit
approached me with a clipboard.
"Ah," he said,
sycophantic smile
splitting his tanless dinnerplate
of a face,
"I see we have another
"like-minded soul!
"We'd like you to join
"the non-racing society!
"You can look at daisies all day long
"and at the end of every day
"we quantify who has done the best!"
And I, sad,
sat,
and wished the sky
would swallow me
whole.

"Where are your gloves?"
A man with watery blue eyes,
And steaming black coffee asks me.
I almost cannot hear him over the brutal wind,
The city taken by storm.

He leans closer and whispers,
"They are giving some away,
Under the bridge."
As if I know exactly which bridge he is speaking of.

Winking,
He continues past me on the street.
Homeless,
But fortunate in his kindness.

Am I right?
Am I wrong?
Am I walking towards the dawn
Or the eternal night
Seeing my future
Set in stone
The path laid before me
My steps already made
I see the paths of others
Their predetermined fates
Some will rise while others fall
They are always walking
Towards their fate
Following the path blindly
Is this the point of life
To be told what to do
I see the answer
Ahead of me
I know what I am supposed to do
I try to break free
But chains just force me back
Fate won’t lose
I’ve seen my death
It happens now
The darkness grips
I’m pulled towards the eternal night
Nowhere to go
My mind is slipping
My legs won’t work
Nothing left
Before I’m gone
I look behind me
I see the face of Fate
A face carved out of stone
In its raspy voice it says
“This is you destiny
You have no choice,but to accept
Now goodbye”
Fate is gone
The darkness is closer
Swallowing me whole
With my final breath I whisper
“No
This isn’t my fate”
I fight
I break the chains
I break free
I take a step off the path
And find my own way in the darkness
I look behind
And Fate smirks

She is a summer and a winter person,
a mountain and a desert person.
The arches of her upper lip come to points
above a bulge that she ***** into her mouth
and picks at with her lower teeth.
A girl once told her she had a perfect mouth.
A boy once told her that her *******
were perfect teardrops.
They would lay together as one.
He would kiss her stomach
while sliding his hand under her lower back.
She would weave her hands into his hair
and pull their faces together
not to kiss but to stare
into his pale blue eyes.
She has green eyes, dark hair, and pale skin.
He was similar only in skin.
He was fall and spring,
forest and river.
Together they could have spanned the seasons.
She loved him like the flower loves the soil.
His eyes could see forever
and she would watch their distant gaze
and feel blind.
The soil does not need the flower.

I’m a fresh out of high school, freshman, at college.
I got scholarships and grants,
So to my mind I pay homage.
It’s granted that I’m a scholar,
Ready for the next look.
Made my way to school, no cash for textbooks,
I can work my way around that,
But that was only the beginning,
Then my mind got caught up in the time I was spending.
Mood started dropping in the letters I was sending,
Moms got worried cause my grades started slipping,
And matters got worst when my girl started tripping,
Couple trips to my home,
Family matters rise,
School coming to an end,
Stress at an all time high.

First summer out of college I get guns to my brain,
Out of school and in the city, the drama remains.
They never pulled the trigger
But my hood still shooting for me.
My problems getting bigger,
But my mom still rooting for me.
So I got to keep fighting,
With the dark truths you threw before me.
I stand in this line to success,
And everyone getting through before me.
I’m not making excuses;
I’m just trying to tell you the story.
I wouldn’t say I lost my way
Rather my way lost me,
So I have to change my ways,
Because losing is costly.
I refuse to be lost just as I refuse to lose,
I was just misplaced,
Just as you do a pair of shoes,
But I found where I was,
And I’m ready to move.

I am not a college dropout,
Just fell really hard,
I did fail some classes but won’t be classified as a failure.
I just failed to recognize seriousness of my decline,
Decided on readmission and I’ll admit I was denied.
My past had a grasp that was too hard to shake,
And it’s still trying to grab me back to that mental state.
Hood mentality, but I won’t diverge from my reality.
I will not return to the state of mind
That tries to keep me down.
Memories will be the keepsake,
That state tried to beat me down.
You think I climbed in this position only to drop out?
The only thing I’m dropping is bad habits
And regretted mistakes,
All of which are trying to block my escape.
I just want to leave the past in the past,
And just pass every class
That’s thrown in my face.

I will deny anyone or anything that states…
“I have to face the fact that failure is my fate.”