A
tear from
my face, the
sudden pain, some from
happiness, some from sadness,why
is it like this, a tear
from the left, I know it's
not good, soon accompanied by
others, these tears make
me think, I
wipe them away,
no more tears
to display,
I feel
terribly gray,
I do not want
to live to
see another
day.

Why do I ask for something but then deny wanting it?
I think about death,
Why can't this be my last breath?
**** me.
Haven't I suffered enough?
I just want to die.
I don't care if this rhymes.
WHY do I think like this!?!?
I cry myself to sleep.
Why ME??
I can't stop.
I need a mop,
for my tears on my face.
I can tell nobody
Why can't I just say I need help?
The words just can't escape me.
I would rather feel empty in my stomach than my head.
Even I am having problems going to bed.

I keep on wondering,
What am I doing with my life?
I want to pound my head against a wall,
If I don't stop I am going to fall,
I can't think of anything else all day,
I keep saying i'll be done with this after today,
Nobody understands what I am going through,
Nobody has a clue,
It's so hard,
Keeping it all in,
"Are you okay?"
No reply,
I just grin,
They have no idea how hard it is trying to be like them,
Like society,
THIN.

Sometimes,
I think to myself,
It can't be real,
It's fake,
I'm faking it,
But then I tell myself,
If i'm faking it,
Go get something to eat,
And then I just sit there,
Trying to accept the reality.

You always see her smile,
She's really good at faking,
But you don't see is her whole life breaking,
The tears, the cry's, all the times she lies,
But she smiles,
She keeps it all inside,
She does her best to hide,
Because no-one can see what's really inside.

I tried to tell you but it couldn't come out of my mouth,
I might be in pain, and my whole life is going south,
I need you to help me out of this,
It's not like living in bliss,
I need you,
I need to be true,
I can't feel anything other than blue,
Sometimes I just want to die,
The teacher asked me how I was today,
I simply said I was okay
In my head,
That's not what I said,
I said I'd rather be dead
I have to many things going on in my head,
It's like a swirl,
Of things that have gone completely unsaid.

With life I want to go far,
I don't know what I want to be,
But I want you Ana to let me free,
I keep lying and hiding secrets,
Please help me Jesus,
I need someone to save me please,
I can't unlock the door with out the key,
Ana has taken it away from me,
"Have you ate anything"
I hate lying but the truth means nothing,
Who am I trusting?
My life is rusting,
I may never find the key,
Just let me be who I wanna be,
And I finally realized I wanna be me.