Won't you leave me alone?
Surely I've asked you,
Enough times,
Even one too many,
You took my pride,
You broke my faith,
And still you linger,
Watching the destruction,
Haven't you done enough damage?

I'm not angry,
Just frustrated,
That so many things,
Are left unsaid,
Just tell me,
I don't want innocence,
Just honesty,
Don't protect me from truths,
From you or myself,
Which ever you feel,
Imposes more threat,
Just tell me,
Anything and everything,
Because I can't stand,
The silence

Waking up,
To inbox 1,
Such a joyous sight,
But after seeing,
The anger behind your words,
The smile fades,
Replaced by a solemn frown,
I wonder if it's because of me,
That your so enraged,
If my endless dillemas,
Are the cause of your sudden rage,
A thought comes to mind:
Maybe I should just fade,
Into the background,
I'd rather not,
But I won't test your patience,
To generous have you already been

The cool, black fabric,
Pooling at my feet,
Such a delicate puddle,
Is this how it will feel,
The next time,
I slide off this dress,
Will it fall to the floor,
As gracefully, as effortlessly,
Along with the crimson tears,
Will it look so beautiful,
Behind the veil of eyeliner,
Slipping beneath my eyes,
Running down my already stained cheeks,
Or will it become,
A dark, unholy thing,
A cruel reminder,
Of his final resting place,
And the hymns echoing from the dim church,
Where we'll say goodbye

I've thought about it,
For years now,
Sometimes for weeks on end,
The possibilities,
Nothing concrete,
Just the idea,
Just dreaming about the ways,
I could bring my world,
To a sudden and permanent stop,
Indulging in thoughts,
Of soft, brown earth,
Over my eyes,
As I watch the world,
From some place else,
Where the pain,
Can't eat away at my insides,
And reality is just a dream,
To my dimmly lit eyes,
Then, will they understand,
What they did to me,
That they cut too deep,
And took too much,
Despite all the warning signs,
The fatigue and distance,
My pale cheeks and thinning figure,
The loss of interest,
In all that I once loved,
The pure lifelessness,
So clear, so obvious,
That they were too blind and ignorant to see...

...Maybe I should,
Just so they will realise

I know there's no point,
Crying or pondering,
On whats been said and done,
That I'm wasting my time,
Waiting for things to get better,
But when you're stuck,
Hopeless and destroyed,
Almost at the bottom,
And the climb back up,
Seems so impossible on your own,
You can't take your eyes,
Off the darkness surrounding you,
Because in this place,
The light isn't bright enough,
To be real

It hits me hard,
Pulling the oxygen,
Straight from my fractured lungs,
I'm so uncertain,
Of myself,
Of the world,
Because when I finally,
Get what I've been waiting for,
The fun's over,
And I realise,
Maybe this isn't what I wanted,
I'm taken aback,
By this sudden change,
It feels like I've lost,
My sense of direction,
Like gravity decided,
To fall to zero,
Without warning,
Throwing my mind,
Into a state of unfamiliar confusion,
Where all I can do,
Is wonder about what could have been,
If things never changed,
And we were still,
Caught up in trivial conversation,
In the midst of laughter,
A place where solemnity,
Can't hold us down