“You’re my world”
“I love you”
“You’re my reason for living”

Tears stream down my cheeks and fall from my chin as I read texts sent to me from another girl
Texts...from you.
Texts that I’ve read before because they were mine...ours.

No, they’re not our texts
They arent between me and you.
They’re between you and her.

Words and phrases that I thought were only said to each-other
Words and phrases that no longer held any meaning
Words and phrases that were all filled with lies

I read the texts over and over
Trying to find proof that these couldn’t possibly be from you to her
Deep down knowing that I’m being foolish and that these are indeed from you to her.

Did you mean all the phrases and words?
Or were they just that?
Phrases and words that held no real meaning.

I wonder how many times you said it to her while you were saying it to me?
I wonder how many times I crossed your mind while you were in the act of betraying me.
I wonder how many times you said it without meaning it....or wait, would it be easier to count the times you DID mean it?

Tear-drop by tear-drop
Phrase by phrase
Heartbreak by heartbreak

“You’re my world”
Just a phrase

“I love you”
Just a few words pieced together for destruction.

“You’re my reason for living”
Yet another phrase.

From the moment we met
I fell for you
Your intriguing looks
And personality too

From the way of your talk
To the bounce in your walk

From the smile you flaunted
You were the boy I wanted

Never realizing you were an intrusion
Waking up one day and realizing
It was all an illusion

“Your so lucky”

The words come at me like daggers
Me?
Lucky?

If only you knew.

Spend a day walking in my shoes
Drowning in my thoughts
Pushing down the lump in my throat.

Spend a day with the sinking feeling in my stomach
Watching your back
Fending off strangers who think they have a right to your body.

Spend a day waking up with tears in your eyes
Wanting to run away at the first sign of danger
Laying in bed with tears streaming down your cheeks.

Spend a day choking back sobs because no one can hear you crying
Putting on a fake smile when someone asks if you’re okay
Putting up with people telling you how lucky you are.

Spend a day in my shoes
Then tell me how
I’m so lucky.

You used to be my inspiration.
The reason for all my poems.
The reason for all my feelings.

You used to be responsible for the giggles before bed
The smiles at sunrise
The blushes between texts

Then suddenly I found the poems weren’t about you anymore.
You weren’t worth writing about anymore.
You weren’t as enchanting as I remembered.

I held you responsible for the poems
For the happiness
For the glow I flaunted

When all along
It was never you
It had always been me

It was then I realized
I wrote best without you
I glowed my brightest without you

You lost your magic.
You lost your charm.
Most of all you lost me.

Without me there is no us.
I handle my own feelings
Finally I’m my own inspiration

To the boy who isn’t welcome:

We talked about a future
We talked about a plan
We talked about how you could be my man

We talked from month to month
Week to week
Day to day

We talked for hours on end
And then you stopped
I was filled with worry
Regret
Frustration
And anger
Finally all I felt was pathetic

I never got a text first
I never got a call
I never got an apology
Now thinking about it
I never got anything at all

I felt accomplished when you did text me back

Goodbye to all the feelings
Goodbye to all the plans
Goodbye to all the “mornings”
Goodbye, goodbye forever
I never needed you
And you're never welcomed back