of course
it comes
and it goes
leaving you with
multiple scars
multiple marks
but less pain
less happiness
less dainty as it is.

of course
we are free,
we all are
though some
might have
borders, boundaries
oh, for all i care
everything seems
lifeless, all misery,
trickery and
fair and square

i may have been
too dense
to notice
i may have been
too incompetent
to absorb
that it was him
then and the day
before.

a person of truth
my cure
innocent look
devilish book.

a person of kindness
too soft
too subtle
too hard to
tell.

she remembered
what happened
on that cold
dawn...

she was so drawn
to this "he"
indeed there are others
but they were
seemingly alone.

again, on that
frosty morn
she was stunned
she was stupefied
from that atmosphere
so calm, so tranquil
he did something
and she was blushing,
tad red, she was
and from that
scurried glance
there filled his eyes
with the sight
of satisfaction
and affection.

he does have
those so-called
mediocre looks

he does have
those off-key
notes

he does have
those unlived
thoughts

and

he does have
a heart of gold
his soul's
way too bold,
way too strong,
way too unwrong.

he was her
current everything,
her decent wings,
her ethereal man,
her eternal friend,
her beautiful distraction
her silent explosion

she was doleful
loathful
but then
lonely,
scared
and worried.

everything might
reach its end.

he was so near
yet
why does he feel
so distant,
very far away
from me?

tears came down
rolling
trying to reach
for his voice
but he never came.
not again.
and then there was
a

she wrote a poem
then...
about him and her
she was befuddled
baffled
she was explicitly
in love with them
she was uncontrollably
being fond of him
of her
of them
because
she was happy

she waited
and waited
but,
something
dissipated.

twas lost.
it vanished
but they saw
such a display
of iridescent
view.

they heard
the sound
from silence
to rain

they smelled
such anonymous
petrichor
as she anchors
the news
he sought for.

he was hers
make that her,
her loving,
caring, sweet
and elite
friend of hers,
her characterless,
careless,
and melodic
tristesse.

crossing those
wildfire bridge
he cried

feeling,
indulging
every sweet
sensation
such display
gave him.

thus,
that ephipany
remained.


he was stunned
and eventually
danced
from happiness
that florished
from those lovebirds'
tragedy.

why had i been
so caught up
with every piece
of this felicity?

i love you so much
to the point of
losing my friends,
my family,
my blood,
my love,
and myself.

but
never did you
ever did what i did
never did you
ever feel what i did
never did you
ever love me like
how i did.

blithe
or blythe
superb it really
is
having him
see and hear
her gestures
her songs
this unwanted
creature
is just so happy
indulging
every sensation,
every affection,
she feels for him,
she gives to him,
and she receives
from him.

maybe she's
clamoring for
this empyrean
man she so seeks
his heart of a
celestial nymph's
his soul of bravery
his obscure love,
her haven,
her puppy,
her endless
trickery.

cold breeze
touches her skin
lovable scent
of coffee is
what he'd seen

blissful talks,
walks,
and songs

unsaid thoughts
resonates within
their inner selves
for what could
she have upheld

unheard words
untouched hands
unloved hearts
no such thing
as "relationships"
can tear them
apart

we all have our
endings
happy,
******,
mad
and sad.

we were given
lots of treasure
for ourselves to assure
we know what's love
from attachment

i doubt myself
with every word
from me, he heard
with every
"i love you's"
from me, he deserved

but
has it always been
me?
or, as well,
did he?

there blossomed
illicit love
last spring,
approaching summer,
nearing winter,
repeating the cycle,
twice for now,
we don't know
what's for later.

what her love was
she purports
but he said
twas spurious
and he's curious
how she can say
something in such a way
he would't understand
for she can never
truly deliver
the truth
which her mind speaks
but her body
won't let her be.

all truth, no lies
everything ended
and started
with a sigh

thus, he could be mine
but, that's a crime

starting with how
every word,
every note
he says
and sings,
were too soft,
too subtle,
to be heard
but i did.

wounded arms
can't come across,
but it's not a
great loss
if it prevents me
and deceives me,
from doing
and believing,
something
and some things

yes
i regressed
but i shall transgress
from liking
to loving
from dying
to living
all for them
all of for Him
all of for "he"
and all for
"she."

when i see you
i see phosphenes
vivid as daylight
colorful and bright

when i hear you
i hear you bombinate
with intricate
notes and melodies.

when i love you
i love "you"
you so happy
you so lonely
you my felicity
my manly
paragon
of happiness
sorrow with
all sorts of rainbow.

1st
i missed him
his peculiarity,
his felicity,
his solitude,
his kindness,
with scintilla
of him
being rude.

2nd
and then
once again
we were reunited
then feelings
were tad red.

3rd 4th 5th
everything went
on and on
taking each other's
turn

friday
stuff happen
fastly seemingly
slowly
creating more fondness,
likeness, and mess

friday night
there she says
how long everything
could, would, or should
last
the epitome of
calendared,
targeted,
earned,
and wanted
"love."

under the horizon
and the boundary
of pure attachment
and of
love
there he stood.

between the moon
and sun
there he
laid.

along the busy
and crowded
hallways
there she
laughed
and popped
and dropped.

near the utmost
love and
friendship
she offers
thus,
everything prospered
everything did.

it means what it
says and she stays
behind his back,
in front of his
reflection
and his unheard voice
so dear and so unlived
yet beautifully appreciated
and loved.

i became his listener
and he's my keeper.

simple hellos
goodbyes
and alibi
ain't enough

simple letters
and notes
won't make him
better

simple smiles
and laughs
shouldn't even be
considered

instead,
making him feel
that she still
and will
cherish him
with her
utmost love
that's everlasting
as what they would hope
but could be ending
sooner or later
as what she and he
wouldn't prefer.

hoping that these
twin and win years
would be at their favor
filled with love
enamour
and nothing more.

twas a sunday afternoon
when he went out
on a tour
just to make up for
the lost time
and leisure.

twas under that postlit
shade when i
started to pick
words under Joker's
and truth lower
than any mundane
encounters.

after crossing
those tiring stairs
i laid my body
and started to worry
after telling him
that i hate him so
after all those remarks,
so poor, said i
it took 20 minutes
for me to realize
that it was either
love or attachment.

tears did drop
though everything
was but a false claim
though everything
was still the same
and still will remain
because deep down
i know that
it is either
attachment or
love.

as for someone
who is never alone
but always is
as for someone
who is always messy
but never is
as for someone
who is never silent
but always is
and
as for someone
who always love
but never feels he is
i witness how your
eyes say your mind
and how your body
says you're not.

let's simply pull
all remarks
all misunderstanding
and turn them
into happiness
that's so far...
never ending.

let's push our limits
and become the unwanted
by our ancestors
but kind of people
our innerselves clamor for.

with every word you say
and every note i sing
will always bring
us with "yes's" and "no's"
but maybe "do's and don't's"

words were too poetic
to critic
notes were too loud
to be heard
actions were too easy
to gesture
but for every leisure
time that
touches our hand
and grabs us
with it's strong
grip
there's a tip:
remember yesterday
see the future
and
live in that moment.

dreams were never
of those romances
but pure second chances.

happiness is never of others
but of self.

so i say this to you
i will always love you.

last thing i saw
was me trying to
lure you out
from that iglo

last note i heard
were just murmurs

last words i read
were simply "dead"

not that i saw,
i heard,
nor word,
but i felt.

be that as it may
during this
winter holiday
that wraps you
with it's arms of
cold daybreaks
i try to let you
witness
how life
destroys yours
and mine.

but
it created shimmers
of hope
at least for me
and yes i see
how every piece of me
directly points
to your street
clamoring
for every piece
of thee
for every word
you say
for every breath
you take
for every love
you give
and for every one
of it
you receive.

just having me
see, hear, feel,
and love you
makes me feel
lifted
where all wishes
are simply granted
with all i wanted
which are
life, emotion, and
you, my kindred.

t'was a cold
rainy night
when i began
loving you
too much.

t'was another
summery night
when i began
doubting "me"
too much.

one query and everything
was bewildered
t'was too perplex
to be answered.

one poem
one letter
one word
was heard
and all were
better.

"if ever i fall
in love with
another "him"
shall everything
be the same?"

he answered...

"either with a smile
or a vile
gratitude would be
my sire...for in such
quick moments
i had you to
love me...everything will
be...till love comes
again
and friendship shall
never end."

Saturday
someone knocked
again..
someone knocked
both were good

Sunday
i liked the first knock
i really liked it a lot
i fell deeply
it was steep
and risky

Monday
he stood tall
under the falling leaves
under those heavenly
evergreens

Tuesday
someone became sad
and i felt bad
for this someone
seems so succumbed
in a radiant sky
but full of cries
he knocked twice

Wednesday
i wrote him a poem
filled with emotions
and happy potions
it did work
but not much

Thursday
he started acting differently,
gradually and gently
he moved me
and so i did
he made me laugh
and so i did

Friday
something came to mind
i realized i was really blind
he told me, plenty of times
as the sound of wind chimes
disappeared and ended
its last notes
that it was me
and it was him.

beside the
lonely,
busy
streets of
felicity,
i pondered
wondered
and then
discovered
that i was too
naive, too wicked
to say i like you
when i'm not
allowed to.

along those usual
corridors and doors
i wait...
when i needn't have to.

inside the sunlit
room i witness
your smile and
for a while
i get to be happy
and then lonely
knowing i can't
have and hug you
for fate won't let me to.

gratitude always
engulf me
for i have met
such an annoying
yet sweet "you"
not-so-good-looking
not-so-good-sounding
yet full of tragedy "you"
always doleful
but never loathful "you"
filled with cries
yet full of smiles "you"

i know i'm way
too selfish to say
i like you
but i want to
be your friend,
a good, sweet
and caring one at least

on this day
shall i mark
a "supposed" endless
friendship
so steep
and never stark bleak.

i was under
the moonlit sky
no lies,
but,
full of cries

he was under
the sunlit
yet rainy
sky
no doubt,
he could be
mine

maybe both sides
wouldn't have been
so seen..
maybe both sides
were so close
that my happy pill's daily dose
is way too much

then i gave in
i told him
after he did
we reciprocated each other
no need to be bothered

but then
again
i told myself
i can conquer him
but not now,
tomorrow,
nor today
but maybe
when the heavens
and times
would let me
so he is.

something bloomed
last Friday
it was beautiful
so powerful
rain showered
and it was a
flower.

...i am made.
...carrying such burden.
...i am made.
...thinking i was broken.

...i am here
...all alone
...in a dark valley
...of tears
...all alone
...in an unreciprocated
...appreciation
...all alone
...in this nightmare
...seemingly a dream
...seemingly...

...i was there
...but
...now i am here
...here where no one
...sees
...where no one
...wonders
...ponders
...and where no one
...is alone
...but me.

"before"
i was doleful
in one way
or another
it is he
who i prefer

i was willing to
die in the arms
of an angel
or an impurity

i was living
with my eyes close
mouth shut
ears are deaf
and
music? "dead"

i was out of it
life's a bore
nothing's all you'd ask for
life's so lifeless
all you'd get is stress

"maybe a daily dose
of inspiration"
(says a friend)
would work

summer and barren weekends...


"after"
i met you
under the autumn trees
you were beautifully made
musically gifted
mentally capable

i heard you
your words
talks about how
i should accept
"before''
and never clamor
for arid days
never seek
for stark bleak

yes, i was afraid
i might fall deeply...
deeper than what
i can handle
and contain
deeper than what
i can say
and digest

love in the winter...

"now"
our journey begins
my love,
towards each other's
heart
towards each other's
hands

our love blooms
in winter
and might die
in summer

BUT, let's
thank and love
every piece of us
every breath we take
is now we make.

is it you or him?
is it him or you?
or maybe both,
who knows?

he was my first Monday
you were my first Friday

he was my music
you were my words

but i know
deep inside
this dungeon
only
curiosity has risen
and
i was never fallen
from where i used to be
from where i was with my music

yes
i know,
it's still him
only that...
it felt like everything ended
last Friday.




but,
everything started
last Monday.

you looking at me
you listening to me
you liking me

everything was but a nightmare
a torment, such scourge
or plague, i tell you
or was it a dream, i think
beyond what words
can sentence
beyond what music
can note
beyond my anger,
my loathe
what distress you have
shower me
from giving me
such false, untrue hope
and i fell, seriously,
to the trap.

you are cheerful,
lovely,
beautiful,
and caring

you're smile shines
sun is your sign
you're voice rings
music is your thing

you're beauty engulfs
you own world
of happiness
sadness
liveliness
and faithfulness

you're love embraces
each and every
piece of someone
his loves, pains,
perfections,
and
imperfections.

you're personality
accepts what's
indefinite, impure,
imperfect and
you insure
no tears are shed
no voices unheard
no notes unsung
no letters unwritten
no miles uncovered
and
all friends are loved.

maybe i was wrong
or
maybe i was right
that all this time
you were all alone
alone in the corner
of your own world
of your own dome
a dome of fantasy
of reality
and of melancholy

maybe i was right
that all along
you were sad,
lonely, doleful,
sorrowful
or however you name it

you called me a hare
at the very least
i didn't care
but you were my puppy
so adorable
endearing, loving
and caring as it is.

i may not know
all your worries
no need to scurry
no need to hurry
finding, searching
and seeking
for solutions
only time can give you
only God can provide
only yourself can ignite.

I may not be so
of a close friend
of a close homie
of a close whatever
but at least, i'm a close hare
your hair?
i'll touch it no more
for now
but i hope
you'll be okay
that you'll be fine
again or not

note
friends are always there
like particles in the atmosphere
like notes that you hear
like food you prefer
like love and anger.

...remarkable day
...nothing's left to say
...it's been done
...i finally see
...what i feel
...we became closer
...more than ever
...then we loved each other...
...we lost our "forever"
...full of regrets
...yet full of sentiments
...forlorn goodbye
...my friend
...my lover
...my rainbow
...and my sorrow...

Once upon a time
As what stories would rhyme
There lived a girl
Living in a faraway town

But then again
There lived "I"
It all began
Last tuesday night

I was under the trees,
Trying to whisper,
Trying to converse
Trying to quench the thirst
Of finding love under
The falling leaves
There he sat
Across the street
With such endless
Melody

He waved, i didn't care
He smiled, out of respect
I did too. But i didn't care

Suddenly, he walked
And stood by me
He talked
And so i did, i didn't care

As the trees bring out their calmness
As the stars indulge skies' darkness
As the pavements lose its color
From the shadows of walking passengers
He stood out.

Wednesday's made for
Felicitous demeanor
Where sun's up
Wind's chasin' butterflies
And leaves, again,
Falling from the trees.
We talked.

Thursday? T'was a tiring one
From dusk till dawn
My eyes were hurting
But still, they're searching
For him. We talked.
But i didn't care

Friday then saturday,
Nice days for bouquet
Nice days for a walk
Along the ocean-dyed walls
In front of the pastry shop
Near the cafe
Across the bench
Under the trees.

Sunday
I waited
And waited
And waited
And we talked
But i did care

Finally!
There came the first monday
Where i found love in the summer
Under the sunlit trees
There he stood
There i witnessed
What love awaits for me
What hope you gave
From you to me.

Lust.

Youth never fail to exceed my expectation. I’ve been living ever since God has made this world, the world of pure love and life.


Love and life could be made a one true pair, I think… This OTP that’s everlasting. I never had eyes like yours, lips, nose, hands, hair, feet, and teeth? None of them. But I know, I have life. I’m intangible but you can feel me, right after your mom’s gamete united with your dad’s.

I have had so many children and I’m only telling you one of the simplest. Leo Smith has been a popular kid in their school, lots of girls would be tailing him every day just to say hi or confess.

On the other side of the world, here’s the beautiful mysterious one in their school. No one seems to talk to her. She was always alone, holding the same book. She’s been seen wandering all the time.


It’s the 23rd of December, after mustering up his courage he sent a letter to her:

Hi! I'm Leo Smith from the other class, will you come to the campus library tomorrow? I just have to tell you something.

She, kind of startled, smiled.

When you are born you have talents you simply grab by your innocent hands, but I’ve held you long before you reach out to them.


I am Love. I exist, in your heart, in your mind, and in your body.

too poignant to remember
those revealed moments of felicity
with someone as exceptional as you
with someone as remarkable as your music

from those days of longing
seeking for those flawless keys
that you possess
i see the light,
from that illumination,
i see your smile...
i hear the music,
from that sound,
i hear your voice...

seldom, i think
of what would it be
telling you how i feel
singing a song
with lovable words
with endearing notes
and pleasant hums

is this love
or a state of infatuation
that succumbs me
every time i see
a piece of thee

is this love
or a state of infatuation
that drowns me
every time i hear
thee sing

is this love
or a state of infatuation
every time a touch
from you i feel

is this love
or a state of infatuation
every time i get jealous
from seeing thee
with another

is this love
or a state of infatuation
every time i write
a poem about thee
on how you hugged my day
with your endless smiles

is this love
or a state of infatuation
that i feel at this very moment
this moment only i know
this moment that's indeed ephemeral
too quick to conclude
too sudden to say
too early to understand
that i love you
then this is limerance

i'm not a fan
of aurora
of beautiful words
of high notes
of fine meal
of fun-filled life

i'm not a person
who is too ineffable
who is too eloquent
who is too capricious
who isn't a nefarious
who has auburn eyes

but i'm a person
whom you can't fathom
masked with faked smiles
covered in blood of sins
drowned in intimidation
pierced with the old same arrows
and burdened with every piece of me

maybe there were butterflies
maybe there weren't
maybe there were skies
maybe there weren't

i was scared
of being glared
at, and am fed
up, with such hurtful stuff

maybe i was too trust worthy
maybe i'm not
maybe i was a fool
maybe i'm not

i seem to be alive
on a count of five
i needed to dive
and die

i weren't trusted
weren't loved
weren't friended
but then i was dead

i thrive for love
for trust
for understanding
and comfort

i thrive for liberty
for time
for consolation
and independence

i thrive for self-peace
but i guess
there's nothing left to see
in this world of deathly reality

He said she was "she"
He said he loves "she"
He said he adores "she"

She says he was "he"
She says she loves "he"
She says she adores "he"

But why does she says
and he said?
Is she really "she"
and he is really "he?"

She and he were bounded by a red string
She and he were fated with lingering
attachments to a "he" and "she"
really, they were meant to be

Bounded by fate and destiny
That...they can see
a knot of friendship
only "them" can unleash

Bounded by fate and destiny
not by love and intimacy
but by morale and respect,
and friendship so unwrecked

Among those people
For me, you're the least lovable
Among the crowd
Your voice tells me you're the most proud

From the first of the days
I listened to your music
I can't find a way
Out of such sound so still

Distant as the ocean,
Bright as the sun,
Eyes of the soil,
A well-versed soul

You're a  flower that blooms in winter
I'm a bee who preyed you last summer

That "first" of the days
It was more than most
It was more than best
It was more than you

Then came another season
There you go, trying to know
That "me" I never wanted
That "me" I never liked
That "me" whom you preffered

But strokes of fate
Unleased its power: hate
Its not yet late
To be each other's soulmates

"He," i preferred so much
Wanting his touch
Seeking for that match
Made in heaven, so please watch

How "she'll" extract
His beauty and love
His songs and poems
His words and notes