i slip, i slide
down this spiral of despair
it *****, it sinks
swarming all around me

stirring up feelings
of shame and scorn
already barely suppressed
it bursts, it spills

it burns, it aches
every fiber of my being lit up in pain
sore from life's beatings
and my own mistakes

i tremble, i shake
wracking my body with shivers
is it the fever? is this withdrawal?
i was always destined to fall

are things falling into place
or am i just falling apart
i bend, i break
into a thousand useless pieces

who are you? who am i?
who's this person in the mirror
with a glazed look in her eyes?
eyes i can no longer recognize

where's the fire? where's the spark?
where's the light that once pierced the dark?
has it truly gone out?
or am i blinded once again?

this face looks familiar
but why does it seem strange?
i can hear myself speaking
but these words aren't mine

tell me who is this stranger
staring blankly back at me
deciding my fate
stupidly, selfishly, shamefully

without a spine, without a thought
this is a battle already lost
how could i win against you?
an enemy i cannot fathom

it's time to wake up, time to let go
time to accept what you've already known
this was always just a dream
one that could never come true

You're a siren, sweet and sultry
Your very voice a temptation
Singing a song so alluring
I cannot place it from my mind

Tie me down like Odysseus
For I can hardly control myself
You make me want to risk it all
Just to hear you speak my name

I'm no better than Narcissus
Drawn to the water's edge
Wanting to reach out and touch
That which is better left alone

But what is life without risk
What thrill is there in not pursuing
That which makes the heart
Flutter and feel alive

My heart aches for you, my love
Were it that I could shield you
From every harsh word or bitter truth
This world dare cast your way

I would do it without a second thought
If it meant you would be unhappy no more
With every sob that escapes your lips
Such pain wracks my chest knowing you suffer so

If weep you must, do so in my arms
For though the world might forsake you
Know that I never will
For I love you, now and always

find the pain
seize it
like a dagger
and twist it
deeper

let the blood flow
like so many emotions
that we ignore
simply thrumming
inside our veins

Raindrops like gunshots
On my window pane
Burnt out with self-doubt
Seeping through my brain

five, six, seven, eight
we will not cut today

four, three, two, one
we promised we were done

eight, seven, six, five
we'll get through the cold nights

one, two, three, four
we said there would be no more