I used to have a million words
within my head,
racing to slip from my lips or
write their way out of me.

Now I find it is difficult to write.
There is no longer a rush or race
to place my passion on paper.

I find I can only write from honesty now,
that my words must expand freely from the heart.

There is less trying only graceful flowing, listening to what each word has to say,
listening for the words which wish to bloom forth into this present moment next.

There is space, there is breath.

I used to dance like a maniac,
needing to rid myself of myself,
needing to explode with colours to feel satiated.
At times I still dance ever so wild
yet I have found when I slow myself and listen
I can feel each toe of this beautiful body whisper with life
like wildflowers growing
and it is then which I feel this love for dance rise.

I used to think I knew so much but now I accept
this grand sea of mystery which lies before me
and the tiny particle of sand I truly am
upon these shores.

I used to love fast
as if each breath were my last.
Now I love gentler
as if my heart were a mountain which pauses
before allowing the morning sun to pierce
through her ripening valleys.

I used to be scared of being seen,
occasionally I catch myself still living this fear
but now I smile at my vulnerability.

I used to leave my roots behind as they were powerful melodies
I wished to not hear
And now I welcome home each strong note of this song as I return.

I used to strive to be whole but now I wrap my arms around my chest and honour this ruptured heart which has broken open so many times yet still drips with sweet golden honey.

And now I find my wholeness
amid this cracking masterpiece.

I used to run
but now I soar.

May you return home
To this beating heart

Like a bird at dusk,
Retreating softly.

Return
To the place
Where flesh intersects breath,
remember this
taste of heaven,
The holy matrimony
Between spirit
and body.

May you return home
to this divinity,
Where blood meets bone,
Where
the symphony of sound and colour,
Sparks aliveness in every cell
and each
little
movement you make.

May you return home
To this tender beating heart,
To the centre
Where the
Earth washes over you
And the Sky holds you
And all your prayers.

May you return home
To the fragrant orchards
Of your own blooming soul,
The sound of your own flowing song.

Remembering the importance
You have here,
how this very place is where you
create your own special magic,
The magic the world beckons
from you
At this time.
Listen gently.

May you return home
Sweeter than ever before,
Dip your toes in golden honey,
fill your belly with the moon, and
Bath your heart in the sparkling oceans.
Fill your own cup with your light
and fill it
Beyond the brim this time.

Easy love, difficult love, patient love, silent love, peaceful love,
loud expressive love,
Slow love.
Allowing yourself
To seep all love
into every crack and crevice
Of your thirsty being.

May you return home.

May you return home
And
Write the love letters
You always longed for,
Fill your aching sorrows
With your own inner knowing.

May you return home,
To the dance of how you truly move,
Releasing constraints,
Feeling laughter and liberation
With every drop of the shoulders.

May you return home,
Wiser and plenty,
Stronger and ready.

May you return home
To a rich rolling field
Across the plains of
Your own naked spirit.

Drench yourself
with the nectars from
An orchestra of flowers
In full bloom,
Make the intangible tangible.

May you return home,
To your own ambrosia,
A Sensuous oasis.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And if the waters do not flow
So easily,
Maybe they are hiding.
Be here in your weariness,
Be here in your discomfort,
Be here in your acceptance,
Be here in your gentleness.

Be here in this now,
In your stillness.
This sanctum,
This temple
Of light.

May you come home
However you are,
Light and Soft, like a butterfly
Or
Worn and weary
From footsteps and long days
or even years,
Etched into the fabric of your soul.

May you return home,
To your own
Resting place
Of peace.
To the silence of this forest,
The valley of this chest,
the flow of this winding river.

Your own arms are waiting
outstretched,
Ready to hold you.

May you feel the softness
Of your own pulse
And smile
With the remembrance
Of your own
Special light.

Sometimes I wonder
What the Ocean feels
When the snow has melted
And the rivers flow freely
Back to her,
And if she greets them
Like the heart of a greiving parent
Holding their child
After many long moons or lifetimes
had passed.

And sometimes I wonder
if this is why the river sings
So beautifully on this journey home,
A silent knowing, a hope filled prayer.

Sometimes I wonder about
how the ocean gives her love and life
to help birth the rain and snow
so this glorious river may flow.

And sometimes I wonder
how many rivers have crossed, how many waters have been mixed over time,
and
how many Oceans have met.

Water is the life blood which ties us together.

And sometimes I wonder
If my ancestors or ones who've walked before me have touched this same water.
How these particles filled with ancient tales have formed clouds which burst over and over,
each drop of rain carrying it's own unique story.

Sometimes I wonder what it means
To be woven with the same rhythms as the rhythms of this Earth.

And sometimes I wonder about
My own life and the changing tides,
how we give pieces of ourselves away,
like how mothers give themselves to their children
And trust like the ocean.

I'll meet you here
In the heart of silence,
When Dusk has drunk his last sip of day
And nights slips in like a silken whisper,
A single flame to light the way.
When the frantic running catches up,
may you succumb.
When all is left
are desperate prayers
Sent to brazen skies,
may you listen.
I'll meet you here,
In the heart of silence.
We hold these bodies,
Unsure of what is us
Or what is the universe around us,
Dancing stardust.
And what do the ocean waves take
and what do they leave?
What is ours to hold
or to grieve?
To let go of,
or to retrieve?
Surrendered unto the
Wisdom of this Earth.
I'll meet you here
in the heart of silence,
The place where life
rests her wary bones,
And truth reveals her gentle song,
Where wisdom and knowing slowly
wrap themselves around you to stay,
their pulse flows soft and strong,
And all else falls away.

A letter to my inner child:
I speak
to your heart, to the longing within you,
to the Earth that rings through you.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Dearest child,
With eyes wide and innocent,
With palms held open unto this world,
Please trust
in this love.
You will find many distractions
in this lifetime.
You will find
Many pretty faces with false pretenses,
Tainted colors flashing,
Promises with no roots,
Fake smiles and sweaty palms
which
All lead you into blindness.
You will find
Tangled arms reaching for you,
Pulling you into the swarm,
Tugging from wars within,
begging you
to join the confusion.
You will find
A shell of a world
with
Loud noises, greedy oil,
and zipping cars
Disguised as redemption.
Do not lose your way,
This labyrthm may swim around you
but your heart is the mountain,
Steadfast and strong.
The moon is your guardian,
May she guide you.
Your soul is the lion,
May she Roar.
Do not fall in love dear one,
Rise.
Do not lose your way dear child,
Trust.
There is beauty
In listening,
There is beauty
in honour,
There is truth
in the silent path.
You will find racing speeds and excitement, enjoy these fleeting moments
As warm gifts of
impermanence,
But do not disregard
the wisdom
that beats and blossoms
from your heart.
For the voice that
walks with you,
that wakes with you,
will lead you
To exactly
where you are meant to be,
So listen.
It will lead you back home
To the glowing alter
of your
own sacred light.
It will lead you back home,
To the vast mighty
Mountain
you are
and
were born to be.

Allow the heaviness to sink in around you.
Allow the dust in the room to settle, fall calmly to the Earth.
Let go of the thousands of words unspoken.
Allow yourself to surrender.
Feel this sinking upon your shoulders,
this lifetime of burden is your own voice singing out.
You are the lotus amidst murky waters.
This weight is yourself calling to yourself.
Allow the throbbing of your heart to receive your prayers.
Allow yourself to come home to this body,
longing to receive you.
Patiently waiting.
Place your palm upon your chest.
Allow this intimacy to run from you
back to you.
To return these chords of familiarity to where they belong.
Allow the dust to settle.
And remember to Be proud
of the river that flows
through you
and your beating heart.

I know better
yet I fall too easily.
Something about the way you reminded me of someone I once knew
in a story written long before.
The time before I grew into this skin,
the time when I was seeking myself in novels with big words which I didn't understand.
How did I trust you
to hold my heart
when I saw how you held yours.