A simple cry for help;
Unheard
Tears falling in silence,
Before my eyes, years flashed by
You know, I thought you went away
And yet here you stand,
On the doorstep of my mind

Perhaps you are fictitious,
I could will you away,
Except I already tried, you remained
Still able to strike me down,
After five hundred times down this road
You'd think I've learnt my lesson,
But I keep ending up here

I can't say where this is coming from,
I don't know what it is I'm trying to portray
A writer with no point of view,
Only trying to put the same emotion,
Into a thousand different words,
Was that fictitous enough to **** you away?

When I peel off all the layers of my being,
I find my core, and therein
I miss you; I’m lonely, and sad
And bleeding, stagnated in time
I stopped moving the very day you left me
And here I am, three years later,
Still feeling the keen sting of losing you

Everything withered, it died,
Without you I died, they say that time heals
I don’t believe in it, time simply passes
And we find ways of masking the pain, denying it
Fourteen days without your voice and I’m falling apart
And even when you’re here, you never stay long enough
To see how much I miss you,

And every day I think of you, every day I mourn
I wish you could see me now, because tomorrow I won’t feel the same
Tomorrow all my layers will be back in place, and my core will be hidden,
So deep I’ll barely know where it is myself,
Next time I’ll see you we’ll still be strangers, and I will smile at you,
Because every second matters, yet every moment is the same as previous ones
Every time repeats itself, and we are stuck, stagnated
And then, before we get deep enough, you have to go,

Every time we put fake smiles on our faces to conceal the pain,
I wonder, do you hurt the way I do, did losing me
Shatter you, because the day you left me,
I shattered into a thousand pieces, and now I’m scattered all over the floor,
Unable to be glued back together again,
Unable to be the same as I once was,

You tore out a piece of my heart
I always knew I wouldn’t survive losing you,
Long before you ever left me.

It’s a machine to keep me breathing,
The steady beating of it reflects the chaos in my mind
It hisses, my lungs constrict
Trapping the air inside, and then.
It pushes the air out, forcing me to exhale,
You see, I can’t breathe by myself  

It beats, steady like my heart;
That too is under control
I can’t trust myself so I put myself in here,
Encased in wires, metal and electricity
I am not my own person, I’m too weak
Too weak to function, too scared to be

Life-support takes on a whole new meaning,
It’s my fragile mind that craves physical help
I’m so tired, I can’t even exist without
Constant guidance, my android lives,
So that I don’t have to

You awaken desire
It’s a hunger longing for closeness
If unrequited, it’s a hurt
Every moment is frozen in time
Every second with you
Matters

You awaken desire
Your handsome bone structure I long to trace
I could lose myself in you,
And your cold grey eyes
Your strong arms; holding me
Tight

You awaken desire
A stolen kiss, hands intertwined
Your shirt ripped from your body;
Reveals a sacred heart, trust and
Blood seeping through the scratches;
I caused down your,
Naked back

I’m freezing; the frost ever so slightly,
Touching my naked flesh
Crystal diamonds of snow glittering
As far as I can see
I can’t feel anything; losing sense of touch
And tears are turning to ice on my blushing cheeks

It’s all an illusion, there’s no sense of time
I’m just falling, yet there’s no ground to hit
I’m stuck in my frozen haven
My body shutting itself down, stopping all the defenses
Left are all the secrets; growing out of me
Breaking through my skin, like a rose,
Digging through the asphalt

The ice and snow; so cold it burns
My skin is the palest white, riddled with lavender
I will always be here
Contained inside my pain
It’s searing my flesh, yet keeping my outsides,
Perfectly pristine
I’ll linger here;
In my eternal winter

Nothing can make this better
Nothing can make this go away
I’ve got the truth staring me right in the eyes
He’s got his hands crushing the last shard of my soul
I’m shaking from the pain; it brings me down to the floor
Tears staining my eyes
Is this my final demise?

You have brought me down
And every time I have climbed back up
But this was all I had left; this was all you had left to break
You demean me, and you turn my pain into nothing
It doesn’t faze you, you’re laughing in my face
Whilst I’m breaking down, for the last time
I hate you for this

She faces choice
She wants to be who she was
The torment isn’t gone, she expected it to
Evaporate, over time
Time has passed, and it still resides inside
There is one way out
She wants to **** it all away

Sharp objects, broken mirrors
A hatred of self-identity,
Hate her, Scar her, Erase her
White, ****** flesh, covered in sickly red lines
Carve, cut and bleed
This will erase
All pain

The blade, slowly ripping through
Digging down deeper, exposing that which sleeps;
Within, it pours out of her
The blood cleansing, she slips away
Euphoric, she is the creator
Of her very own
Catharsis