On a night like any other
What a sham it was to think,
As if my belly had changed address
That I’d settle for just one drink.
The bottle’s neck was all I did need
But my neck I did not heed.
Before the taste had left my lip
The bottle it did tip, surely just one more sip.

Since that very first compromise
A fog has thickened in my eyes.
I’m now mad at the wall and ready to brawl
With any fella I so choose to despise.
I’m a rooster tonight, with every cause to fight,
And every last hen in town is a ten.
So I’ll swoon every one, won’t stop till I’m done
Wake up drunk enough to do it again

But first, a trip to the loo
Hell bound for the toilette
So, on the no-one-near I don’t spew
Clearing this foul gullet.

The dreams
Are scratching
  The side of my brain
Bone fingers poking through the membrane
R.E.M sleep the ghosts seep in through the cracks
They sing to me-
       The sweet nightmares
          A demon whispers wordless
              Right beside my ear
                 "Do you want to **** me?"

It clawed me first
Dangling the honest red loop
That loop from the shirt
That one they tore
That one I cried over
That lover that shamed me
A patient of mine
losing. blood with with
no single transfusion
and you bite your nails
And I listen
Click
Click
Click
Take me to where the leafs are
I need to leave our pizza
And yours
Hold my hand my van Pelt
Don't leave me
Weep and dry your eyes
On my new necklace
Kiss me and share my salt

Why scratch?
I wanted to pet you
Superficially of course
But is that ******?

i thought this was it
this one is the one
that was my mantra
but happiness seems to preclude
ignoring
this that and the other
and love
love??!
tell me thats not another shade
of pure blindness
yearning seems quaint compared to this
but it still has to be something
lets invent a new word
something that screams like my heart
something that cries and rolls around
something that jumps on the bed
and laughs
and warms my bare feet
im open to suggestions

...She was naked and cold
like a *****
deprived of mercy
Seeking home with
three wishes
and a rope
She used to believe in morning love
and jasmine
and lilies
and blood-soaked lies
She prayed for wings
under the electric lights
and burn the broken pages
in her backbone
not to remember but
to feel what it felt like
She
slit her throat
and tried to smile
tasting the last warmth
of the midnight
sun...

we tend to cry
for those who
die young;



why?

nauseous, not intoxicated
a day without, a day in hell
convinced its truth so just as well
show up at 3am, ring #4 again
shows up in a hoodie
showing bear skin
can't help but feel her
eyes, lips, messy curly hair,
memories from the last ******* year
invade her privacy, reminded of...****!
swears, no, i promise,
explains me ear to ear

you look so much ******' prettier with that **** in your mouth,
funnier, cuter, smarter while you're chuggin' 'em down,
"flirtatious and irresistible, everyone wants you around",
******' hangover princess, here, we bought you a crown.
lie after lie, truth swirling around in the toilet,
begging for his affection, on your knees and exploited,
stripped of your dignity then try to say you enjoyed it?
that's funny, the **** you talk the next day proves all that's *******.
was nice and respectful, of course you thought that was swell,
loved you for you but you didn't want my help,
tried to do to me what you ******' did to yourself,
i'm over it, we're not friends, *******, go to hell.

blank save for the handprint
above the desk where some soul
lost their grip and left themselves.

soap so coarse it punctured skin
while water sprinkled out
to cause an incident.

down in the drain clogged
with hair where some soul yanked
itself so hard it forgot some strands.

a bald apparition with a broken tailbone

painted red and glazed like clay

locked in a furnace when it hoped,

from the covers before the alarm,

to float away...