Red streaks like lightning
sting in the corners of her eyes.
Sleep: out of reach.
Tethered to a wall,
repelled like 2 magnets that won’t touch,
bouncing.
Her thoughts are lights extinguished,
soft glow still permeating,
just enough to feel the
nag nag nagging
of the panic. Unwelcome intrusion.
Field of view like the wrong end of binoculars.
Far. So far, and a blur shifts
slightly with each blink.
Hands aren’t hands when they cannot move.
An accessory.
Weighted arms, legs cinderblocks.
In an ocean she would sink.
Screaming bubbles that
float to a surface far.
So far and desolate.
No land in sight.
Island couldn’t describe the lonely.  
She’s a deep sea undiscovered.
Pressure insurmountable and rising
rising
     rising
to the sun. Catching fire.

(Disclaimer: Read from top to bottom, then bottom to top)

No,
When I said
Yes
He gave me
Everything.
I never wanted
Him to stop
I wanted
More of him.
He gave me
That side of him,
He gave no one else

for another.
for someone that knows.
someone that sees
all the things you wish
you couldn’t
and stays.
someone that doesn’t give up
on you
even when you’ve given up
on yourself.

the feeling of your fingers
tracing the scars on my skin,
the tingle you leave on my lips
as your mouth parts ways with mine,
and the way your tongue forms my name
in a way that no other can match.
I crave
the light in your eyes
when my pupils are reflected in yours,
the wrinkles covering the folds of your forehead
as worry takes over every cell in your body,
and the way your voice cracks
when the worry refuses to leave.
I crave
your arms around mine
gentle, calming, warm,
the strength in your hands
as they grip mine tight,
and the way your nose crinkles
from the pain you refuse to admit you carry.
I crave
the times we were together,
nothing able to break us apart,
because you used to
crave me too.