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your fractured wrist beckons slowly to the pinky
carefully moonlight denies your pleas
can you see what it's done to you
the bugs are whispering
break his knees
did i say i loved you once
underneath the willow, examining a fallen twig
did i look up at the light and tell you you were golden and green

i didn't find the answers to your questions that summer or the one after that
my words are barren
a glass desert


and i'm sorry i don't know how to love after the battles have been won
when it's not unrequited
when you're finally within reach

i'm sorry i become a ***** shell
a wordless mouth
a quiet stare, making noises between the ears
never loud enough to hear
 Jun 2013 Glen Brunson
Anne M
She waged a silent war
on his smile
some mornings.

Because she knew
--if he tried--
he could grasp her
by those white flags.

And all too easily
she'd surrender.
 Jun 2013 Glen Brunson
JM
Right now I want to cut myself,
deep.
I'd like to drop lit,
wooden kitchen matches
onto my willing abdomen
and watch
my flesh melt
away.

Something has to give.

Bind me to an iron cross
and flay my skin.
Strike my joints
with a metal rod
until I am
completely broken.

This cannot last.

I'd like to grab
hold of the flesh
under my jaw
and rip my ugly face
off of my ugly head.
I want to pound nails
into my knees,
chew on thumb tacks,
skewer my eyes
with toothpicks.

I spent an hour
scraping calloused feet
and toes when I could
have cut them off
with a pruner
and saved some time.

I'd like to do these
things, but I am
not a *******
I am no victim.
I am no martyr.
I am not so deep
in The Nothing.

I would rather
perform these acts
upon you.
How can I make something out of nothing?

Like honestly, I was born with all I could ever ask for.

Then when I was six my dad died.

Car crash... I was in the car with him that day.

A few years later my mom died of cancer.

I held her hand as she died.

Child services tried to send me to my crazy uncle in Vermont.

I couldn't let that happen.

I ran away.

I was labled "A.W.O.L. #4."

For almost a year I survived on change I found in the streets.

I also wrote my own songs and sang thrm on the corner of a street for just dollars a day.

Until this one day...

She came to me like a dream.

I was washing my hair in a public fountain when she found me.

She was wearing white shorts and a red shirt tucked in.

Her hair was pulled back in a neat, curly ponytail.

She walked up to me and offered me her towel.

(She had just come from a day at the beach.)

I took it from her and thanked her.

She stared at me for what seemed like an hour.

I held out my hand and told her my name.

She shook it and told me hers.

She saw my tattered clothes and my ***** scars.

"Want to come over my house? I can get you some new clothes and you can stay a night if you'd like."

I couldn't decline.

I had no other better offer.

I only had 3.21$ on me and my notebook and pen.

She picked up my book and took my hand.

She took me to her house and instructed me to take a shower.

She handed me soap and a towel and shut the door on her way out.

When I got out she had layed out clothing for me and told me to meet her in the kitchen.

She cooked me an omelet with cheese and a salad on the side.

She handed me a glass of orange juice and without another word she left upstairs.

I was almost done by the time she came back down.

She had a bag in her hands.

She took out a razor and mens shaving cream.

Then she grabbed scissors and smiled at me.

She wet my hair and slicked it back.

She began to snip away at my hair.

I watched lock after lock fall down.

When she was done she dried my hair with a towel.

It was beautiful.

I thanked her.

She even shaved my face.

I felt so new and clean.

I told her I had to leave.

She asked me to stay one night because it had already began to get dark.

She took me to her room and told me to get on her bed.

I went on and she put a blanket on me.

She then layed down on the floor.

I told her to switch spots with me.

She refused so I picked her up and put her on her bed.

She told me if she had to sleep on her bed I had to sleep with her.

We woke up the next morning and her mother was standing over the bed.

It took a while for her to explain what was going on.

Her mom then called Child Protection Services and told them where I was.

A week later we went to an office that looked like it belonged in an insane asylum.

I was told to go in a waiting room.

After two hours of waiting she came back out and said, "Let's go home big brother."

She was holding yellow papers in her hand.

Adoption papers.

I had been taken in by her.

How can I thank her now?

She had saved my life.

And since then she has saved my life three other times.

I have nothing to give to her.

How can I make something out of nothing when it depends on my dear sisters' happiness?
Thank you for saving me from the world Adreishka. I love you.
 May 2013 Glen Brunson
James Fate
I've fallen in love
with being human

taken to life
like a puppet

given one chance
to be real

but I still howl
at the moon
sometimes
We were just lifting weights.
Then she went off to yoga class.
I was doing my reps.
She came back tired and worn out.
I told her to call it a day.
She said she wanted to do more reps with me.
How could I resist her big brown eyes begging me?
It happened while we were doing suicides.
She began to slow down.
I turned to look back at her.
She was on the floor.
I ran to her and turned her on her back.
She was coughing.
She was barely breathing.
I asked her where her inhaler was.
She shook her head and whispered she has lost it.
She began to shake.
Then she fell silent.
I yelled for help.
Forgetting we were in a soundproof gymnasium.
I gave her mouth-to-mouth.
After six tries she woke up.
She steadied her breathing.
She sat up and held onto me.
She said thanks and hugged me.
I picked her up and put her in the car.
Now we are home.
She is laying down.
I am watching over her.

She could have died.
It would have been my fault.
She almost died today.
I couldn't live without her.
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