This sleep does not suit me,
this sleep without youth.

Heavy lids and heavy lies the body but
my mind takes shape reminiscent of
waves and the mermaid fins, dreams of
glittering beaches to wake up sweating
mid-winter.

Why is it that I putter and sink into crevices deep, still?
Why is it that I cannot share the moon? Her piercing
brilliance has endured eons alone, and
I feel a comrade in her shivering ripples.

This sleep, my darling,
I will not allow it.

Time seemed flawless those distinct seconds
But yet again you vacated boldly  

I’m scrambling confidently
Through the portal
Reaching for ****** opinions

Sometimes the thought of hope belittles you

There is a solo anticipating you
There is a journey expecting you

I named a diamond after you mailed the postcard

It could always be.

remember that time you tried to sit me down and tell me all the reasons why my heart was broken?

and i said, You can’t break that which isn’t yours, darling.

i am in a room full of babies who won’t look directly at me,

only at my chest or my shoes or anywhere they can send judgmental daggers because of their conceptions about our history which they shouldn’t give one **** about but people

Feed

off of dramatics.eat them up and **** them out.

oh, i’m sorry, am i making you uncomfortable by staring you straight in the eye? i am not afraid to confront the coffin of words between us but you would rather

Hide.

behind those long lashes and longer lies.

yeah, i know, i feel it too. we’re a walking graveyard of romance that should have been. i scared you because you could have taken me home to your mom. because i have my **** together and don’t play games. because we met under a full moon and a shot of whiskey and it seemed to easy to be true

easy is overrated.

my knees were once floppy for your love. now they are

Locked. rigid. resonating. why do you keep letting fear win all your rounds?

i will never be able to look the other way.