beauty is most tragic of forms, like the gentle rain at the end of summer, marking the end of life. my hurt is endless, it softens and hardens of its own will. beauty in form, form in it, it being love, love that never ceases, love that cannot die. love that will not die. it goes on and on, like currents of the great ocean, like the days of my life. a river of blood and tears and ***** flow endlessly along my path, in an attempt to dry my veins and numb my pain. you, of the earth, my lonesome love, my one and only. may our gods bless your world. may they help you realize my love was true, that even in our dysfunction, there was nothing more important to me. you of godly names, my eternal lover, my heart and hands, my hurtful other, i will always love you.

good night and god bless the liquor.

i don't believe in much. i don't believe in gods, i don't believe in myself, i don't believe in goodness, i don't believe in the world, i don't believe in your words, i don't believe in love, i don't believe in my words, i don't believe in humankind, i don't believe their eyes, i don't believe in the drugs, i don't believe your lies, i don't believe their lies, i don't believe in aliens, i don't believe you loved me, i don't believe in the hate, i don't believe in freedom, i don't believe the doctors, i don't believe the judges, i don't believe the TV, i don't believe this reality, i don't believe in much, but did believe in you, so special was i a fool, but now nothing is me, and everything just remains as dust in the wind.

my love is for one. pure and simple. my love is for you. my love is forever. my love is a rock. my love is the ocean. my love is for the blind. my love is blind. my love is as sand. my love will be my destruction. my love will be my end. my love is for you. for you and you alone. until i turn to powder and fly away with the wind. you are me and i of you. so be kind.

i cut my arm because it held your hand. i cut my other arm because it grabbed your **** from time to time. i cut my legs because it made me feel free and painless from your hell. i cut my face because i wanted to to be ugly and nameless, so yeah.

and that's just what i wanted out of this world. i cut my heart because i didn't want to be connected to you any longer. and that's all i could handle on the inside of my self. i cut my soul because that's what you wanted the entire time. i would've went forever loving you the most i could but now I'm just a skeleton, with nothing but my memories. through and through. my bones soaked with sorrow, my soul soaked with hurt. i love you until the end. and i know that's a foolish sentiment, but **** it, what else can i lose. nothing but my physical self, so I'll just keep writing my gospel. until i disintegrate.

hopefully you'll realize you care.

i love you.

i love you. despite the fact that you are unformed, unborn and conceived only in my dreams. your just as beautiful as your mother. even though she is nameless and faceless and of no character, except of course she resembles the ocean.
please be kind. under all circumstances. its the only redeeming quality of the human being. i want you to succeed me in every way, because that is the sole reason why we had you, so you can be better than me. I've made so many mistakes while walking my stretch of the road, but we will overcome this eternal darkness. through you. we're born into this world alone, and alone we go out, there is no god, there is no devil. only me, you, and the world. so enjoy it. cause i won't be here forever and neither will you. your beauty is beyond compare, your mind is shard as onyx. always love yourself. never let the world convince you your not beautiful. because your priceless. we make true what we want, remember that. when you fall, just get back up, cause all along your road you'll collect scars, they may never go away but they're make you who you are. its ok to give someone your heart some day but never give your soul away, its the only true possession any of us really own. life is hard, life is bliss, and when i'm dead and gone my only real goal is to be truly truthfully missed.

one day i hope to have the pleasure of meeting you. one day maybe i can speak my words in person. until then.

I'm so tired. my eyes are itchy, my feet hurt and my heart is numb. i feel like my soul was taken away and its enjoying our life without me. and as seemingly tragic as that sounds, somehow I've gotten used to it. I'm just numb, not dead. not yet. with the realization of this truth however, my life continues without you. we only converse in my dreams. but at least that way, i still remember your voice.

sometimes on hot days with blue skies, i look to the stars and wish a bolt of lightning would crash down through air and trees and leaves to strike me while i walk. render me nothing but charred remains and an empty heart. but the daydreams always end, and i just continue existing.

blue ocean, within those eyes. so deep i could drown. and no one except for you would know. my reflection in them somehow made my life so much easier. god how i miss them.

good night my sweet. may you dream of conversing with me as well.

past it all, all the hurt and the tears and the loneliness, all the drinking and smoking, all the silly things we said and all the things i've wrote and all time in between, i still miss you. plain and simple. i miss the way you make me feel. i won't die. but it hurts. every day. i can't replace you. it just isn't possible. every day all i want to do is run all the to your house and tell you i still love you. but i don't because i have a feeling it won't  go the way it does in my dreams. i know i haven't been around on the earth for very long compared to some but i want you to know that our moment together when we loved each other, that was the best time in my life. and i don't really see how anything that comes after can be any better.

i miss your face and the way you snore and the way you smell and your laugh and your eyes and every thing else you possess that just isn't the same when i look at other girls.

i miss you. plain and simple.