why does math hate me?
why does it call my name and pretend
that it hasn't butchered my brain?
pretend that it hasn't cut up precious pieces of myself
that i actually need
why do i sit here
in the corner of the class
writing poems
about my keen hatred?

hi math
i'll give you the *******
i don't give a **** about what you think

i don't know why
it feels like you're not real
if you're happy

don't know why
it feels like you're hiding something
if you're not crying

i don't know why
it feels like you don't want me
if we're not constantly talking

i don't know why
i feel like you're not standing here next to me
when we're closer
than we were before

hate sitting there
waiting for your old hair cut
to not give me a bad feeling

hate sitting here
thinking...
why the **** are your jeans so tight?

hate sitting here
knowing full well that there's no reason
to feel this feeling

hate sitting here
waiting for your eyes
to not be ******* dead

hate sitting here
knowing that you're going to have to touch me
with cold hands giving me shock
and a clenched jaw

hate sitting here
out of control
with you're hands around my neck
and a head ache
i wish would leave me alone

hate sitting here
i really just hate it

eat the egg
have the chicken
fry the chicken
and scramble the egg
visit the live chicken and call it by name
as you steal it's eggs from it's cage
when the chicken can't lay no more
eat the chicken
that hatched from it's egg
punish it for not being a good little mother
punish it for age
punish the chicken for not laying
when they can't help their nature
eat the chicken
crack the egg
watch a chick fall into your frying pan

that one **** *** that you can spend the rest of your life with
like as a friend
or like, you know, more
jamie
cuz, you know, why not?
the girl could break your heart
and she'd do it in a way
that you wouldn't know
until it was far to late
jamie
cuz, you know,
why not?
she's a keyboard smash
and your crack addiction all at once
the reason that you started smoking
and couldn't stop
she's the lightning that breaks the tree in half
and makes skunk stripes in your black hair
she's the one that you'd let burn up your life
jamie
cuz, you know, why not?

hi
what in the flying **** is happening?
can you answer me because it seems like you can't
it seems like you've superglued your mouth shut
tied your fingers up
never to type my name again
hi
what in the flying **** is happening?
can you maybe like find the time to type a few words
after all, look at this poem
maybe you could take the time to mumble something under you breath
something that i know i won't like
hi
what in the flying **** is happening?
you know what
you can just **** right off
if my life means nothing to you
then tell me
why, in the whole world of other people's lives
that you could **** up,
did you chose mine?

it's like a tsunami in a bottle.
everything that i've decided to feel,
and all of the things i wished i never had.
do you ever wish you were near me?
ever wish to smell the salty waters
that earthquake within?
you're a burnt crime scene,
hoping all of the flames
would burn away the evidence
only making the finger prints into dark bruises against glass
you were a hasty mistake,
something to cover up what happened
you were a fiery mishap
i was a tsunami in a bottle,
nature trying it's best
you were a crime in smoke