He carries remnants of a broken child.
Cradles the pieces as he tries
To silence the echoing cries.
He provides love with strong tight hugs
But the pressure isn't enough.
He can't continue on nurturing himself.

I feel different.
More in-tuned to emotions
yet more in-tuned to reason.
I just can't be one without the other.

And do you love him?
My heart gnaws on my conscience.
Does the Friendzone count?

And it's behind these notes
I hide and let myself sing.
Tomorrow will be better.

Truth is...
I can hear a part of my heart
Protesting with every heartbeat.
It screams
"Don't date, Just wait"
But My mind tells me
"It's done too late"
While I just stand there
like
Truth is...
I still want you...

T ired of feeling like this
      because you are so far away, stuck in your head with what others would think
       not thinking of anything but that
R eally? That's the question I ask, why? I wasn't good enough, if you break his heart or he yours you'll go  
     with me and be mine.
Y esterday I might have waited. Yesterday I might have just dreamed but now I got someone
     I don't know what will happen, but I am going to TRY.

Tonight was busy
Got more to check off the list
But can't check him off.

Talk to you later I will say
Not Goodbye nor Farewell
Because in doing so I will be admitting that you are leaving

I will not hug you, with wet eyes and a mind wishing you'll stay
I will fight the urge of running towards you as you walk away
because I will lie to myself and tell
That I will TTYL

I will shake your hand with a firm grasp and pat you on the back
I will let your hand slip away and my voice will not crack
When I speak those words with a heavy heart,
Knowing I might not ever see you again,
TTYL

Tu eres mi amor, you are my love
and tu tienes mi corazón para siempre

Nothing can compare to the love I have for you
Not the sun or the Luna
Nor las  estrellas
you are the goddess(more of a god) of fortune and good luck, Fortuna

The love for you has been building up
Like a volcano and it wants to explode
its fuegos artificiales going up in the sky

Tu eres mi amor
and you have my heart forever

You are my love

I thought I was done
but love aint done with my yet
when is it ending?

Two Minutes*
That's all I need to hold on to you
To inhale the familiar scent of yours
To rest my head upon your chest  

Two Minutes
That's all I need to tell you that you are the only one that matters
To kiss your cheek and hold you tighter
To hold you and feel safe

Two Minutes
That's all I need to tell you I will always care
To kiss those lips with passion
To cherish the feelings I will have

All I need is Two Minutes

Draw me a picture
with my heart in two pieces
not with the shattered line drawn in the middle
but with them on opposite sides
Because one side is still needing to catch up.

My weekend was horrible
leaving me emotionally numb
But on the bus I heard you bickering with another guy
"I am going to do it today."
"You should do it now."
Back and forth Y'all did

Then when we were inside
You asked for me to go outside
"I like two people, One is this girl, do you know the other one."
I knew right then
My mood changed
my cheeks warmed
"I do but I rather hear it from you." I said
I was in heaven
You took sometime and then you said
"Well it's you, I like you too."
Even though I knew
My day changed in two seconds flat

Even though you like her also
And I don't like being a a second choice
I will take this and make the most of it
because I have been waiting
For this moment
To make me feel happy in two seconds flat

At times winter visits early,
Spitting fragments of yesterday’s snow,
To strike an already scarred face.

Yet, at other times the curve of its finger
Interlocks with the conscience’s
As it blabbers on like an infant.

But then his back severed the cord as it closed the door to our conversation.
What wanted to be said got hit in the face and retreated into my throat.
and
I choked on every syllable.
I too turned not desiring to be cradled by the arms of silence.
I opened the door leading to the case of stairs.
Every step mimicked his words enraging my feet
and
They attempted to mute but they grew weary in defeat.
Closing my eyes I spun facing his general direction.

It was as if an audience drew in breath,
Afraid their breathing would interrupt the ****** of this scene.

White noise complained obnoxiously, fluttering nigh the sides of my ear
And
An inferno asphyxiated brashly the cells my heart neared.


“You were-are worth it”


But those words muffled by the cradling arms of silence
Were carried by the white noise
Before
Ashed by the inferno.

...Night is not the absence of the sun it's the introduction to a different state of light...

I heard the devil today.
he nagged of my noncompliance
But I can't help it that I follow no one

I'm tired of feeling like I've been misused
Thrown 'cross the surface of "I Love you"
Only to skip ahead into the thickets and overgrown weeds.

I hold your hand but did you know we don't really touch
It's just the force of my hand and yours deflecting.

Circle Me with red
mark me diagonally with death
Take me heart and use it for your sacrifice
Just know I am already dead

Take some time and see that I’m the one
Take some time and see that I love you
Don’t ever forget that I was the first
To break the walls , to get through


Lend closer and feel the warmth inside
Lead closer and feel my heart beat
But don’t forget, oh lord don’t forget
I was the first you did meet

Take my hand and fly away
Take my hand together we’ll stay
Take my hand so we can be alone

Give me the love and the time
So I can say that you are mine
Show me all that I have shown

I had a dream.
In this dream ,that my mind conjured up for my enjoyment while my body rested, you were there.
I was there and some random lady who was a TV personality was also there.
We were all talking and having fun.
You smiled as she made a joke and my eyes lingered at your lips.
I wanted to kiss you but knowing how you didn't know yourself I contained myself to the spot I was standing in. and Plus I didn't want to do it in front of her cause she gave me the creeps.

You reached into your pockets and there was 30 dollars. You thought you placed them back in but I saw them falling. Twirling like Maple leaves onto the damp floor.
I picked it up and and called your name but you already went.
I spent my time throughout the whole dream trying to find you.
Jogging down stairs I didn't even know Ours school had.
Asking people if they have seen you
I searched and searched but to no avail.

I was left with nothing more than 30 dollars and a sadness that began to sweep it's self over me.
Then the cops came and I was running from them for no reason
then I woke up.

They tell me you're no good
That much is understood.
But they don't know you like I do
No they don't know you like I do.


Your mistakes cover your path
They prevent them to see
That if they were rooted and thrown aside
A good guy you could be.

I guess I am tangled in your hair again.
Anchoring my boat in your eyes.
but now this time
I wonder what is going to happen?

And we can not stop coming in like a wrecking ball
So clear all the tables from your wide mess hall.
we bout to damage up, We bout to trash it up
We bout to rip all of your paper love.

It's time to begin but with the beast inside
We tend to stop and think, then we let it fly
And no matter if you cry
All our "pretty faces"at some point have to die.

If it were only me I would stand in the line of fire
feel my body turned gymnast contort as the bullets riddle
kiss the ground with prideful lips, rise, and implore for more.

but life is a cruel dictator and commends my brethren to torture along side of me.

Rain fell from the sky
Drains into my soul
I regret something
That I never told

With a heavy fist
Death came rapping on your door.
Calling out your name.
Death begged for a kiss
Death wanted a little more
Death, for you it came.
It couldn't resist

Yes I am jealous.
The fire seeps out my eyes and into your Lover.
I dont hate her.
Just hate that she is with you.
Funny that i am in this perdiceriment again.
Cupid is running a cruel game.
The Irony.
yes i am jealous.
I like you.

Winter is a pleasantry compared to this blanket upon me.
Despite its harsh remarks against the bulk of humanity,
I'd rather experience that than this constricting blanket.
Winter brings forth frost from its diaphragm and unto earth
But with this blanket, of comfortable coverage there is a dearth.
Must I wait till morning to dispose properly this blanket?

You left me in the darkness
All alone to fend for myself
You let me keep thinking
But you loved someone else

Was it all just a big game?
I the fool as you played charades?
Cause I can’t handle
This big scandal
Why oh why must I feel this way?

I am tired of playing these games
I am tired of feeling the pain
Do you want me?
Do you want to hold me?
Do you need me?
Cause I am slipping
Away

Have you heard about the man
Who was hit by a van
He was carry pans
When BAM!
He got hit by a van.
Did you hear about that man?

I smear the tears on the page
and they make words.
Confessions.
Hopes.
Dreams

There was a time when I thought you did everything right
I must have been too blind to see
No wrong, No lies, Boy I must have been out of mind*
Uhh Yeah I was But now I am changning what the heart wants

And I cried
Let everything go
and cried.

A flower caught in the wind's bent arms I saw today
I began disputing it's given name.
A Calla Lilly, A rose, a daisy
Perhaps it's -I'm just crazy .
It's a flower with beauty and it offers it in display
I saw a flower today
I saw a flower today.

I read the words of your eyes as I turned you over.
They said, "It's a wonder that the world doesn't explode when two people meet for the first time."

The orange ambushed the tip of my tongue
my tongue felt the keen sting of acidity.

A thousand sun's wavered in the wind
hanging on the tips of a tree's arm.

Everything just disappears.
The walls are not there.
the shower heads are not there.
the people are not there.
Just us.

But there is one thing that does stay.
Its him.
His eyes.
His scent.
His face.
His name.

You see while I fill the void inside me
I think of him.
While I indulged on a feast that satisfied my lust
I think of him.
His name.
His face.
His scent.
His eyes.

I stopped not because the food wasn't good
But because him in my mind was becoming to great.
making me realize that I wasn't eating with him but with another.

I have no idea whether I should stay put and endure whatever may come my way
Or seek refuge.
I have no idea if I should give in and let myself fade to nothing or if I should fight and struggle not to be led to the background
I don't know what to do.

What is it that we are doing?
The TV murmurs in the background.
Breaths are shallow.
Nothing makes sense anymore.

You can do so many things to hide,
Warp yourself in clothes that show A different view,
Hang with people who don't even know
But in the end
As you lie in your bed,
The you that you try so hard to conceal is there
Patiently waiting for you to shake it's hand and say you are done with hiding

I let my guard down
And I let you in
But you didn't catch me
I'm still fallin
In and out of love

With every touch
I exploded with Bliss
But With every touch
I longed for your kiss
But you never seemed to give it up

You had me in your grasp
With only enough room to breathe
Twisting and turning
I wanted to be free
From you I had enough

You were right
When you kissed my arm
My blood pressure shot up
leaving me behind to try
and avoid your eyes.

Take A mintue to hear what is being said
I never chose to have feelings for men
Take a moment for it to register
That I could have married and had children with her
but I didn't
I decided to be honest and speak up
But I was shot down

Like a piegon shot from the sky
As it only wanted to fly

You tell me that you don't care when I am older
but right now I am a child i don't know any better
but I do
I know what I am and chose this route so later in life
I Wouldn't suffer as much

Like eating junk food everyday for lunch
and grwoing up to find out I have stomcah Problems because of my lunch

I chose this path, the path of coming out,  knowing the dangers
Knowing what Challenges I would have to face
And this path I am taking will make me stronger

And it seems I was biting off more than I could chew.
When I told you I still Liked you.
I was tangled with my wishes and hopes
that I lost sight of reality.
It was only until I stopped for a moment
and looked back
did I realize
I should have
kissed
you
.

I can't cry
Not because I don't care
but because I would know
That everything was real

I can't help but to feel
I accidentally changed you
For the better
Or worse
remains yet to be seen?

And it was time for our goodbyes
but as we embraced for the last time
I looked to the sky
"I don't want to let go"