Where would I be now
If i wasn't ruined?
Hurt?
Broken?
It all destroys you,
Likewise making a
Beautiful mess,
It makes you lose
Control,
You're no longer fighting,
You eventually give up,
On everything,
You're no longer trying
To breathe in the air
All around you,
Trying to eat,
You can't even sleep
The way you once could,
It's waking up everyday
Wishing you had
Died in your sleep;
From crying in the
Shower just so no one can
Hear you weep,
From laying in your bed
Early in the mornings
Wishing you were never
Born;
It's where cutting yourself
Just to let yourself know
That you can still feel,
To the point where
The pain doesn't even
Matter anymore,
It's just a feeling,
A rush,
Of letting yourself know
You're still alive,
After all you've
Been going through;
This massive monster
You've turned yourself into
Caves in on you,
Consuming you,
Making you whole,
It becomes a part of you;
So now I answer,
Where would I be now
If I wasn't ruined;
Oh sweet naïve child,
This is all I've ever
Known

c.c.