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Oct 2022 · 92
Life of a Man
fleabag Oct 2022
The eyes we open, to attest to the sun
And shall bright light be waking or but anything other than gone
Then, we crawl, speak, laugh, and stand
for thee exists and walks the land

It is blessed, thus, not oppressed
That which a man is able to feel some
Passing onto another, thy bequest;
To cry, to love, yet eternally as they come

If a man seek only of joy
Will he found it in the absence of pain?
But he is to experience it as to employ,
in sight of what after one may gain

Yes, a man long of happiness
Yet in times, it is ache that accompanies with it
Though one shant be daunted
As life goes on, we are of grace and not haunted
#life
Apr 2021 · 139
rare and sheen
fleabag Apr 2021
Thorns were thrown at her shoes
Whispering like needles
And she, a nimble listener
Bleeds while picking it up

Eyes of ripe pineapples
Gaze upon her entity nauseatingly
The pain of flaws she used to deny
Complete the puzzles of her self

Once scattered as the leaves of narra
Unwary like a child in the street
Lost in the breeze of own doubts
Yet she chose to dance with the stars at night

Now, she is blissed-out with full of blemish
Like the monthly curtains in the kitchen sink
Luster of the northern lights at dusk
Rare sheen just like a meteor shower
#selflove
Mar 2021 · 80
light in the dark
fleabag Mar 2021
The world is a mess
And your feelings have come to depressed
How can you see the side of no corners
When you're looking at the darkness of it?

Touch the rough bristles of the paint brush
Come seek where the leaves quiver in the breeze
Filling your mind with the music of your playlist
As your heart beats to the melody of its rhythm

Embrace your trembling body
And feel the warmth of your soul
Take a deep breath of relief
And lead your blues into the light of life

You, a survivor of broken vows and arrows
In a chaos of fear you're living in,
Is a beauty from the beast
And the light in the dark
Nov 2020 · 65
lost yet found
fleabag Nov 2020
Since that day,
I've been writing a lot
I had to let go of your hands
so I could pick up the pen I've lost
Overwhelmed by the grief of longing for your sweet voice,
and each letter that compromises thy words
But this utopia you've created fogged up my thoughts
and led me astray:
A place where I don't belong
And so here I am,
lost
yet
found.
#lostyetfound
Nov 2019 · 424
Shady Men
fleabag Nov 2019
Tell the night to sleep
and close these eyes as I weep
Tears left nothing but stain,
creating scars from the pain
Nothing seems to soothes this misery
like singing grandma's elegy
I'm writing this from a broken pen,
speaking hatred to all shady men
#Shadymen
Oct 2019 · 109
You
fleabag Oct 2019
You
The sky was once grey
But now it turned into blue
Somehow I decided to make way
And then I knew it was you

You have seen rainbow behind the clouds
And laugh every time I cry
All the stars have been so proud
I think I love you, oh why?

You gave me happiness
Even when I didn't ask for it
You cured this loneliness
And my heart smiles every time we met

The world seemed beautiful
Because you opened my eyes and let me see it
Even when I look like a fool,
You are my greatest happiness even though you don't love me
#you
Sep 2019 · 1.6k
Sapling and Zephyr
fleabag Sep 2019
Her name is Sapling,
a tree with calm and quiet chirpy personality
She lives her life the way it is.

When one a day comes,
Zephyr, the wind,
suddenly caress her soul moderately
Sapling can do nothing
Nothing, to stop it from coming
and devouring itself.

Why can't Sapling do anything?

A choice to fight over oblivious Zephyr
from hurting her,
from how Zephyr slaps her leaves
and sometimes even letting it fall to the ground
like an ordinary *******,
from how Zephyr swung Sapling's stems,
making it dance like it had just agreed to
but it never did.

Sapling stays calm in every idyllic second of her life
but that was before Zephyr came,
now, she was fuming
for Zephyr had caused great downfall to Sapling's life
Every little thing Zephyr had done to her
meant a lot to her.

Yet, there is only one thing Sapling had not known:
Zephyr had no choice either.
I am 'Sapling' and my love for him is 'Zephyr'
Aug 2019 · 372
Words untold
fleabag Aug 2019
There was cloud in the skies
But rainbow in your eyes
Violets are blue
My heart belongs to you
Roses are red
I can't get you out of my head
You're a man out there
With stars in your eyes and galaxy in your hair
Your eyes can't stop from twinkling
And Mr. Moon even starts dancing
Your eyes shines brighter than the stars
One look and it'll erase my scars
Those eyes makes me restless
Looking at you, I felt reckless
If your eyes could speak
It would make me weak
You find light in the dark
And I love the bite of your bark
Lips redder than roses
Thumping heart has racing horses
Lips sexier than it is
It makes me wanna give you a thousand kiss
Limerick is humorous
Yet your smile is dangerous
It is your voice that I miss
And your laugh's a pure bliss
Your face was kissed by the sun
I can't live when you're gone
Your face looks bold
And you're classic like Egyptian gold
Coffee and milk tea
When I see you, there's glee
Cinderella's shoe inside the glass
Your smile ain't worth a million cash
You're a loss to insanity
And in your heart, there's purity
Yellow, orange, black and white
You're elegant than the northern lights
You're peculiar and rare
Too handsome, this isn't fair
Black and pink
You're good-looking even in a hundred blink
You're a genuine aesthetic
Your beauty's making me lunatic
Yes, looks can be deceiving
But I like the thought of believing
Heaven and hell
You're my only angel
Beauty meets the beast
I need you at the very least
Pizza and fries
All my words aren't lies
War left bloodshed
Your name's tattooed in my head
Your actions are pure temptations
Looking at me is one of the accusations
Poetry has satire
You're the one I desire
Mirror mirror on the wall
You're the one I love among all
Marshmallows over the fire
You're the one I admire
Five seconds of summer
I dreamed to be your lover
Cinderella never asked for a prince
But then I have loved you ever since
Am I obsessed?
Because you're making me feel blessed
If my heart could walk
It would come along with you and talk
I know I don't have a chance
But honey, I love the way you sing and dance
I know I shan't love you
'Cause I'm a sucker for anything that you do
Yes you can't be mine
But still, you are my sunshine
You could break my heart in two
But I swear I'll still love you
The sun rises, the sun sets
Loving you isn't one of my regrets
There's summer, spring and winter
And me loving you forever
My love for you is like a hurricane
It's making me wild and insane
Did you ever wonder?
My love's twelve feet under
Jack and Jill
My love's thirty feet over the hill
I may know zilch about you
Yet my heart says I do
Hoping to hold your hands soon
Even once in a blue moon
You may know me as a stranger
Admittedly, I am one of your secret lover
There's tons of fish in the sea
And I'm not who you're meant to be
Whoever she may,
Will she be with you every single day?
Thinking about you lots lately
Have you been eating breakfast alone like me?
Are you living in a better place?
'Cause you're always in my head space
Every time it's raining
I hope you're not crying
Every heart has string
Every phone will ring
If you ever felt sad and lonely
Don't ever hesitate to call me
At times when you're depressed
Just take time to rest
Autumn is Fall
I'm waiting for your call
Sea has shore
I love you more
Loving you may taste bittersweet
But it is what makes my life complete
I didn't have that high expectations
I already accepted all of your beautiful, love some imperfections
My love for you isn't the conclusion
Seeing you happy is already a satisfaction
My love for you is just like a movie
I want the ending to be happy
Some endings could be tragic and sad
But don't you ever feel bad
My love for you is all i have
You don't need to worry
Seeing you smile makes me happy
I wish you could have your greatest happiness
Let God be the first witness
Twelve months in a year
I'll always be here for you to cheer
June before July
How I wish I could wipe your tears whenever you cry
September after August
You're the one I love the most
October before November
Take care of yourself, my lover
December before January
I like your personality
March after February
Hoping you are happy
April before May
I wish you happiness every single day
There's one thing I'm only asking
Love yourself before anything
I'm just watching you
Doing the things you like to do
Some stars may get dim
But you'll always be the man of my dreams
My love's greater than three thousand
I'll make you a poem even a thousand
I give this poem for you
A million thanks to you
One love I could give you
I love you
to the one who deserves more than a poem♡
Aug 2019 · 368
Lost
fleabag Aug 2019
Have you ever been lost?
where the pavements seems to
take you back from the past,
when time isn't gold anymore
and love isn't enough
to heal a stranger like me,
unearthing thyself under the
pages of a book
and the thirst of an ink:
I don't know who I am
#lost
Jul 2019 · 242
Truth
fleabag Jul 2019
The truth isn't like the brush strokes
of Vincent Van Gogh,
nor the texture of the canvas he used
It wasn't like seeing the yellow and orange
sunflowers silently placed inside the insipid vase
Truth isn't like seeing the starry night
move across the blue sky
I never knew what it is, and why
#truth
Jul 2019 · 595
writer's block
fleabag Jul 2019
I have ink in me
and a clean slate of paper
but my hands won't move
#haiku
Jul 2019 · 606
Lies
fleabag Jul 2019
a mere hint of lies
is a peck of filthy cries
living in your eyes
#haiku
Jun 2019 · 326
Same sickness
fleabag Jun 2019
Turn off the lights
this room's filled with lies
You're looking at someone's eyes
consoling her raucous cries
My fingers intertwined
with him but you don't mind
We vowed to stay each side;
flowery words we used to abide
We've made every mistakes
like leaving hearts off for a better sake
We never tried to look at the depth
took steps, slammed doors and left
We broke vases like promises
and let our love die and turn into ashes
#pain
May 2019 · 170
Dearest friend
fleabag May 2019
You opened the gate
and we've met - it's a fate
Since that day,
we talked all the way
Our friendship lasted for years
celebrating both birthdays - cheers!
We exchange colorful secrets
and share our biggest regrets
You're a sturdy wall;
I can lean on whenever I call
We only have each other
at any times, just hold on tighter
You are my everything
I wouldn't change you for anything
To Jane, my dearest friend
My love for you will never end♡
to my best friend Jane,
I wish you the happiest 16 living and I love you more than you know♡
May 2019 · 163
Used to
fleabag May 2019
We used to be one,
sharing cigarettes and wine
Not now when you're hers
#haiku
May 2019 · 863
Fireworks
fleabag May 2019
There was spice in your eyes
as the fireworks **** around the sky
Reflecting colors in the still blue sea
and leaving off smile in your dreary face
The cold breeze of fresh air poked your mushy cheek
Making you quiver like a lost little kid
It was indeed loud
yet your heart beats louder
And in a blink of a moment,
It was all gone, and quiet
Everything's back to black
There's nothing left but the darkness embracing the moon alone
Why didn't the fireworks last too long?
Just like us and the love left along
#heartbroken
May 2019 · 225
Still hoping
fleabag May 2019
My shadow's dancing
without you for the tenth time
But I'm still hoping
#haiku
May 2019 · 248
Mystery
fleabag May 2019
Hold me like it's real
Suffocate me with your kiss
Hug me like the fire
Be with me like a shadow
Love me as a mystery
#tanka
May 2019 · 102
Faith
fleabag May 2019
Dancing the thoughts away
as you try to hide the pain
Everyone thought you're okay
No one sees you crying with the rain

You always smile and laugh
as if everything's going right
I know you're into something rough
and that you wail every night

You may not speak a word
but your eyes tell the stories
Just pray it to the lord
and he will take all your worries

Give him all your heart,
and He'll give you a beautiful start
#Shakespearean Sonnet
May 2019 · 139
Since
fleabag May 2019
I do still love you
My days get darker each day
Since you've walked away
#haiku
May 2019 · 132
How
fleabag May 2019
How
How can I move on?
How about those memories,
And my fealty love?
#haiku
May 2019 · 105
Where
fleabag May 2019
Where are you right now?
My heart's been waiting for you
Where can I find you?
#haiku
May 2019 · 125
Why
fleabag May 2019
Why
Why did you promised,
If you'll break it anyway?
Why'd I trusted you?
#haiku
May 2019 · 120
What
fleabag May 2019
What is wrong with me?
What's taking you to leave me?
Tell me the reason
#haiku
May 2019 · 787
When
fleabag May 2019
When will our eyes meet?
when our souls would intertwine,
When will you be mine?
#haiku
May 2019 · 123
Thou, A beautiful art
fleabag May 2019
Thy eyes shine brighter than the stars
It lights up even the darkest of night
A gaze from thou could erase these scars
For a second, my life felt so right

Thy smile is heart melting
It takes these burdens away
Thy lips is sweeter than anything
I wanna taste it someday

Thy laugh is a sound from heaven above
It heals every pain inside my heart
But it is not I whom you love
So let me look at thou like a beautiful art

Even if it's just a lie
I promise I'll forget thee, goodbye
#Shakespearean Sonnet
May 2019 · 109
Graduation Day
fleabag May 2019
We were waiting for this day
When we used to be a stray
For this day to come,
Our little burdens will be gone
The early wake ups
And the late night sleeps
More project scheme
Even if days are dim
More performances to present
Yet smelled the successful scent of event
In this day,
We should be happy
Glad we're finally free
We seem to be prisoners
Forever felt like those years
Too focused on our goals
Yet we played different roles
From a stranger to a friend,
A best more than just a friend,
A good listener,
And a life changer
In this day,
We are to be delighted
But why'd it felt like someone's dead?
We are filled with sob
As each one of us hug
There's a pain in there, deep
As each one of us weep
We cried not because we're happy
To never see you again is a possibility
We may walk separate path,
But those memories will forever last
The times I cried with you,
When I wanted to give up, you hold on to
All the jokes I laughed,
Even if it isn't funny enough
Every time we had a fight,
I prayed we'd be okay every night
Thank you for the moments you've shared
And for the times you've cared
I will treasure them
Precious than a diamond or gem
On this graduation day,
The last day I'll be with you
The last day I'll see your faces too
Remember me even if apart,
Take me within our heart
Maybe we'll meet someday soon
I'll wait for that; day, night and noon
dedicated to my junior high school classmates, thank you for the bittersweet moments♡
May 2019 · 410
Betrayal
fleabag May 2019
I was sitting in this worn-out bed
Crying with weary eyes
In this quiet night,
M heart's howling in pain
Mind's screeching in sadness
Soul filled with loneliness
Ain't I worth it?
In this snug room,
I am nil
Out this box,
Insignificant and frivolous
You've forsaken my love
When I've given you my all
You neglected me for who I am
And left me all alone
Human are hazardous
So am I
Then do I really have to be on one's one?
I am no veracious person,
But I am ought your attention
People are negligent enough,
Humbug and phonies
Today you're my chum,
Tomorrow's a foe
I treated you fairly,
Somehow you've betrayed me
I handled you with care,
Yet you've chosen to break my fragile heart
to whom I used to call 'friend'
May 2019 · 2.4k
Snow
fleabag May 2019
What a lovely thing it is
Varied by its coldness
Differ in designs
It is distinct
Whereas every drop weighs
It has purity in nature
and cleanliness in color
Disastrous it may seem
It blinds living species
A fuss in human's eye
But a thing is certain,
The coldness within
signifies it's exterior
Turn the world upside down
It will always be cold
Can you feel its coldness my love?
Embracing every part of your body
Tracing each wrinkles in your skin
Fighting that fiery soul inside you
Yes you've felt it,
It was strong
But what I have is stronger
And how come you don't?
My pain shows
Colder than any snow
#pain
May 2019 · 408
If fairy Godmother comes
fleabag May 2019
I was left
Felt every piece of pain you gave me
Keeping it by myself
Kept it in a bookshelf
I'm hurting inside
A secret I hide
It's all in my mind
This grotty piece of canal
It is filled with blues
And overflowing thoughts
Hoping it'd stop
Hurdle it with stones
I'm sick of it
Tired of everything
The world's in my head, running'
To the pain you've caused me
Yet you didn't even say sorry
I ain't waiting for you
I was waiting for fairy God Mother
Will she grant me a wish?
Just like poor Cinderella did?
A wish to shift all my anger
Dispose every sadness
Inside a big, big balloon
Tie it with anguish
Tie it the tightest
Through the darkest night
With these eyes close
I'm willing to let it go
Be it free
Swallowed by the darkness
Be it unseen
I would leave out all the rest,
If fairy God Mother comes
#pain
May 2019 · 289
Never be
fleabag May 2019
Wished I was someone
She, whom you love
With a body perfectly fit
Sparkling white skin
Black soft shiny hair
Adorable pinkish lips
On fleek eyebrow
I ain't like her
In a million times,
I do wished, will always
So many times I caught you
You had one's eye on her
Looking at those face,
Night and day,
She wasn't, but I did
You were the fish
She was the hook
I am the fisherman
These eyes of mine,
I could never take them away from you
She claimed yours without noticing it
You want her, need her
Calling her name, I've heard
You loved her, you still
And I can never be her
I will never be your girl
#insecurities
May 2019 · 468
Naught
fleabag May 2019
Lived in an upside down world
Can't ascent up to where you are
An unreachable one,
Unobtainable man
You and I are  unlike,
An ant to an eagle
Jungle to a city
Frog to a prince
South to north
Far from princesses story
Nothing I am to you
Unfamiliar, perhaps unknown
You're valuable than diamonds
Needed than dollars
Wanted than gold
Rarer than platinum
Expensive than jade
Colorful than the fireworks
You lighted up the darkness
Broke down the silent nights
And awakened my sleeping heart
But what's the use then?
I am naught to you
#pain
May 2019 · 196
Good old songs
fleabag May 2019
Focused by your beauty
As I was listening to the music
Memories flashed back
The times I was loving you
Whenever you passed by,
Hiding at the back of the window
I was,
It's a wonderful feeling
It was,
Precious moments they used to be
A worth remembering one
Yes, the new one's are pleasing
Still and all it was the nicest,
Like the good old songs in the radio
Old yet unforgettable
Time may pass by,
But you'll forever be here,
In the depth of my heart
#love
May 2019 · 147
Over again
fleabag May 2019
Without pain, there's no you
I wouldn't have loved you so much
Without love, there's no me
I didn't have found myself
You change me
something even I, couldn't
You are my weakness,
an extension to my strength
Regardless of our past,
tomorrow is a clean slate
Says 'Love must be earned, not demanded'
that's why I have you
Happiness isn't a where or when,
It's a here and now
and I am satisfied
with you now and then
All those pain I'd felt,
gloomy days I lived,
these tears I earned from you
It's my steadfast love to you,
My greatest one
In indefinite moment,
I've come to ascertain, I love you
because I've picked you, to hurt me
Nevertheless, I'm free up to the point of choice
and I've chosen to love you
Over again
#love
May 2019 · 237
Invisible
fleabag May 2019
All I need is time,
for this feelings to fade
these scars to heal
Said "better days will come"
I hope it will
For this will be invisible
like how I'm used to
and this love's gonna be
I will always love you,
love you 'till the day I can
It was a promise;
unworthy-to-be-broken one
You should've hurt me
but then you didn't
Somewhat I did myself
yet it was the worst pain
#pain
May 2019 · 157
Restless
fleabag May 2019
Our bodies keep on moving
linked by our mind's order
Too focused on our goals,
aren't it tiring?

Achievements fed up
It sometimes increases your pride
Don't forget how you got there
not through mind, but heart

After everything you've had,
fulfilled your dreams and needs,
have you ever done some good deeds?
or haven't you felt contented yet?

Bodies wanting, needing
a cycle, never ending
Our souls could be tired,
do we feed them accomplishments?

It is just inside us,
hiding deep within, exhausted
We should take time to rest
and take time to thank Him
#love
May 2019 · 184
Suicide
fleabag May 2019
The road is wide
but your mind is tight
The sunlight is bright
but you don't have that kind
Leaves are falling off the tree
but no one's setting you free
The cars are moving
but you are staying
The smoke of the city is frustrating
but you don't mind it smelling
People are busy themselves
when you're standing there by yourself
You have seen the world in trouble
yet they've seen you unlovable
You, a lonely innocent child
Watched the world gone wild
It was the biggest mess;
the world isn't blessed
Humming birds singing
but you're stuck there, crying
They've seen mist in your eyes
when all you've seen are their dark lies
Time ran so fast
but you wished it won't last
Your mind is curious,
how did human became hazardous?
Wondered how it feels
if everyone's just real
Then there would be no pain,
anyone could've gain
In this **** cold night
trying to figure out your life,
traffic lights says green
Standing still, how long has it been?
Do man get tired of running?
in your heart, a wish is waiting
In a place somewhere new,
would he be there with you?
In a moment, it turned red
You wanted to sleep in your death bed
the pain and anxiety,
it's making you weak daily
Without a hint of hesitation,
you took a step in one direction,
ended your life, a satisfaction
#depressed

— The End —