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fleabag May 2019
What a lovely thing it is
Varied by its coldness
Differ in designs
It is distinct
Whereas every drop weighs
It has purity in nature
and cleanliness in color
Disastrous it may seem
It blinds living species
A fuss in human's eye
But a thing is certain,
The coldness within
signifies it's exterior
Turn the world upside down
It will always be cold
Can you feel its coldness my love?
Embracing every part of your body
Tracing each wrinkles in your skin
Fighting that fiery soul inside you
Yes you've felt it,
It was strong
But what I have is stronger
And how come you don't?
My pain shows
Colder than any snow
#pain
fleabag May 2019
I was left
Felt every piece of pain you gave me
Keeping it by myself
Kept it in a bookshelf
I'm hurting inside
A secret I hide
It's all in my mind
This grotty piece of canal
It is filled with blues
And overflowing thoughts
Hoping it'd stop
Hurdle it with stones
I'm sick of it
Tired of everything
The world's in my head, running'
To the pain you've caused me
Yet you didn't even say sorry
I ain't waiting for you
I was waiting for fairy God Mother
Will she grant me a wish?
Just like poor Cinderella did?
A wish to shift all my anger
Dispose every sadness
Inside a big, big balloon
Tie it with anguish
Tie it the tightest
Through the darkest night
With these eyes close
I'm willing to let it go
Be it free
Swallowed by the darkness
Be it unseen
I would leave out all the rest,
If fairy God Mother comes
#pain
fleabag May 2019
Wished I was someone
She, whom you love
With a body perfectly fit
Sparkling white skin
Black soft shiny hair
Adorable pinkish lips
On fleek eyebrow
I ain't like her
In a million times,
I do wished, will always
So many times I caught you
You had one's eye on her
Looking at those face,
Night and day,
She wasn't, but I did
You were the fish
She was the hook
I am the fisherman
These eyes of mine,
I could never take them away from you
She claimed yours without noticing it
You want her, need her
Calling her name, I've heard
You loved her, you still
And I can never be her
I will never be your girl
#insecurities
fleabag May 2019
Lived in an upside down world
Can't ascent up to where you are
An unreachable one,
Unobtainable man
You and I are  unlike,
An ant to an eagle
Jungle to a city
Frog to a prince
South to north
Far from princesses story
Nothing I am to you
Unfamiliar, perhaps unknown
You're valuable than diamonds
Needed than dollars
Wanted than gold
Rarer than platinum
Expensive than jade
Colorful than the fireworks
You lighted up the darkness
Broke down the silent nights
And awakened my sleeping heart
But what's the use then?
I am naught to you
#pain
fleabag May 2019
Focused by your beauty
As I was listening to the music
Memories flashed back
The times I was loving you
Whenever you passed by,
Hiding at the back of the window
I was,
It's a wonderful feeling
It was,
Precious moments they used to be
A worth remembering one
Yes, the new one's are pleasing
Still and all it was the nicest,
Like the good old songs in the radio
Old yet unforgettable
Time may pass by,
But you'll forever be here,
In the depth of my heart
#love
fleabag May 2019
Without pain, there's no you
I wouldn't have loved you so much
Without love, there's no me
I didn't have found myself
You change me
something even I, couldn't
You are my weakness,
an extension to my strength
Regardless of our past,
tomorrow is a clean slate
Says 'Love must be earned, not demanded'
that's why I have you
Happiness isn't a where or when,
It's a here and now
and I am satisfied
with you now and then
All those pain I'd felt,
gloomy days I lived,
these tears I earned from you
It's my steadfast love to you,
My greatest one
In indefinite moment,
I've come to ascertain, I love you
because I've picked you, to hurt me
Nevertheless, I'm free up to the point of choice
and I've chosen to love you
Over again
#love
fleabag May 2019
All I need is time,
for this feelings to fade
these scars to heal
Said "better days will come"
I hope it will
For this will be invisible
like how I'm used to
and this love's gonna be
I will always love you,
love you 'till the day I can
It was a promise;
unworthy-to-be-broken one
You should've hurt me
but then you didn't
Somewhat I did myself
yet it was the worst pain
#pain
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