I'm like an apple
tainted with worms
that ruined me before you could
and made me unedible to you.
immune to your bite.
they will forever weaken me
but in a sense
they made me stronger

Don't worry, you're safe with us.
You can trust your government officials.
Hmm? What's that?
School shootings?
Ah, yes. Those are tragic.
But they aren't our concern at the moment, no.
Our top priority for now is to ban a few social media apps
and rename the Gulf of Mexico.
Maybe even invade Greenland while we're at it.
Oh, but don't fret.
This is all for the greater good.
We promise, we care about our American citizens.

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