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Faith Melton Dec 2011
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I don't want these thoughts,
But somehow they've crept upon me
As I lay sleeping in my bed.
These thoughts of me and you,
The pain that always comes with it
I feel drained of happiness,
The happiness I had with you.
I can't help but think that
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
But I can't think it true.
Without you here with me,
I know I'll always be in agony




*can't help but still think it true
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Dull, it seems to have a beat of its own
Lacking life, emotion, it tears me apart
Uncurable by any pills

Intense, it keeps me awake
Jabbing pains, needle-like
I can feel it behind my eyes

Reaccuring, it's never gone for long
A few seconds relief, barely savored
It never ends
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Ma amie,
You're always there for me.
J'adore tu pour tout ce.
I couldn't imagine my life without you.
Ma ange dans le deguisement.
You're my savior.
Tu garde de tant de les choses.
My protector.
J'adore vous.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I know it’s too late to say sorry,
But I have to apologize for all that I have done wrong.
I know you’ve moved on,
But I’m still thinking of your memory.
I know what we had is gone,
But I still hope you forgive me.
I know I’m probably opening up old wounds,
But I just want to get out what I need to say.
I know I was terrible person, an even worse friend,
But all I ask is that you read this and kind of understand
I know that you were hurt, and that I’m at fault,
But at least know that I regret it all…
Faith Melton Oct 2011
His fingers caress her neck
Strumming her strings
So lovingly.
Black’s a dress she wears
Fitting to the curves
He strokes with firm hands.
Love is the music they play
An endless chorus
I can’t help but watch
Cheering from the crowd
Watching him play
His melody
Faith Melton Oct 2011
My mind seems to be at a blank
Not being able to put pencil to paper
And not having an idea to thank.

A picture of a raging tank?
It all seems to waver,
My mind seems to be at a blank

Ideas waiting in swank,
My mind beginning to taper,
And not having an idea to thank.

A picture of a beautiful sandbank
Seems not to come any clearer,
My mind seems to be at a blank.

A picture of a cliff with an overhanging plank
Is not becoming any brighter;
And not having an idea to thank.

My thoughts seem to be minuscule and lank
Making me seem like such a dreamer.
My mind seems to be at a blank,
And not having an idea to thank.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
It's like I'm dying,
The actual realization
Of my own downfall's
Rapid approach.

I don't want to lie
But I'll smile and pretend
Because in the end
I know you wont understand.

I'm surrounded by people
Day to day, but I'm alone
Always the same faces,
It all becomes old to me

I thank you for making me smile,
Behind all the salty tears
I know you wont ever understand
The things that go on inside my head

Someday I'll be able to explain,
When all this misery finally fades.
I'll tell you, word for word
Maybe then you'll comprehend.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I'm done with hiding it.
You're like the air in my lungs
I need you to breathe
But I won't go down easily
I'll try until I turn blue,
From the lack of you.

I could talk to you for hours
If only I could call you mine
Tell you everything is gonna be alright
Love you, I just might
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Shards of glass,
Strewn across the counter
Revealing a broken face
Riddled with cuts and bruises
Hiding agony with lies,
A fake smile only to get by
A fate so undeserving,
Innocent,
Making decisions so young
Life isn't fair,
It's cruel, unforgiving
Thrown away with all the letters
Something no one will understand
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Blue
Is communication and healing
It inspires spiritually and creatively
and is always calming and patient.

Red
Is passion, courage, lust and love
Fast action and driving forces
and arouses strength, vibrancy, and health.

Purple
Is the marking of royalty
The love of the third eye
and our self-ambition

Black
Is the cloak we wear to hide
Mistaken for evil or harmful
and long afflicted with the "dark side"

Green
Is the dress of mother Earth
Meaning prosperity and fertility
and connected so closely to good fortune

Pink
Is romantic and passionate
Associated with goodwill, peace, and affection
and nurtures emotional health.

Orange
Is the secondary color of the sun
Connected to ambition and success
and self-confidence, strength and justice.

Yellow
Is our mind and intellect
It is intelligence and philosophy
and related to attraction, charm and persuasion.

Gold
Is the color of the sun,
It symbolizes all things masculine
and imbued with wealth and winning.

Silver
Is shade of our moon
It is associated with all things feminine
and is intuition and psychic abilities.

Brown
Is the animals in nature
It is related to dwindling wilderness
and is a color of protection

White**
Is the absence and combination of color
The symbol in purest form
and the sign of innocent pure love
Faith Melton Oct 2011
One, two, three,
I know we were meant to be,
Endless romance created by we.
You picked me…

Four, five, six,
My broken heart you fix,
Laughter we mix.
Our names written with sticks…

Seven, eight, nine,
Sitting together under pine,
Our love we sign.
Together we’ll be fine…

Ten,
Eternity written with a silver pen,
Never giving up we try again,
Our love stronger than any has ever been.
You are my biggest sin…
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I'm losing focus.
Intake becomes more,
It becomes heavy.

The petals of the rose seem brighter,
The green grass more vivid.
I can be anything.

This is what he's turned me into.
Heeding his advice,
following in his footsteps.

I wonder why I love him,
I wonder why I'm attached.
But I'm not blind.

I know it's wrong,
He keeps me alive.
My eyes are open

Living, breathing, seeing.
I know it's bad,
not really society's favorite thing
But I love it.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Quiet, that's all I ask for
Complete silence is what I need
Your voice is the ringing in my ears
Loud and obnoxious
You whine and complain
Critisize and bicker
Do you find pleasure in destruction
A sense of success in my pain?

My patience wear thin,
Someday I wont be here
Who will you lay your faults on?
When you lose contact with me?
Will you recognize you wrongs then?
After it's too late?
Faith Melton Nov 2011
I saw you from across the room,
Hips swaying, pumping to the beat.
I watched from afar, as you bite your lip
Cause you know everyone is watching
                           -captivating...

I stare because I can't touch,
As your clothes drop to the lit floor.
You're exposing yourself,
Willingly, you have no shame.
                           -shameless...

This is what you're paid for,
A masters degree gone to waste,
As you become the candy
Of every man's eye.
                          *-wasteful...
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I barely remember you
It's been two or three years
You went on business matters
To another country
You practically ignored us
Gave us barely enough money
To ever support all of us
We lost our home,
had to leave everything behind
But eventually mom met someone new
Now I don't like him either
But sadly he's better than you.
He doesn't yell
Or kick holes in walls
I'm not afraid of him.
I can't him dad, or father.
I never will.
You may be my father,
I won't call you dad either
Faith Melton Jun 2012
Faint memories of you from years ago
Not the best, full of anger and hate
Two people who were supposed to love each other
Unconditionally, always and forever
At each other’s necks, murderous.
He wouldn’t fall for it, her controlling nature.
Three children together, part of a broken home
Never knew the love of a real family
Stuck with the bitterness of a lonely mother
Without the presence of a father figure

She lost hope, dated only men she could control
Lied to the children, told them their father left
That he no longer cared for them,
Didn’t want to be in their life any more.

But he told them things would get better
That he’d try to be there
Making money was hard
Paying a greedy person ever harder.
But it’s I who sees the family falling apart
Mother is getting married to a man she can control
Letting him control and taunt us
Denying us what we need, greedy, spoiling herself

Home is where the heart is but her heart isn’t here
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Will you leave me, love?
Say no, say no
Save me from grief
Of my love's departure
Don't let me shed a tear
Say no, say no
To loving another, dear
Don't be the knife in my heart
Cutting away, slowly and unjust
Will you leave me, love?
Say no, say no
For my life is worthless,
Without your arms around me
And your warm breath on my skin
Say no, say no
To loving another, dear
For my brittle heart can't take it
Not another word, not another lie
I'll grieve until you return
My unfaithful butterfly...

Will you leave me, love?
Say no, say no
Save me from sadness
Of your untrue love
Don't let me shed a tear
Say no, say no
To loving another, dear
Don't pierce my soul with lies
Ripping, quickly and cruel
Wil you leave me, love?
Say no, say no
For my world is crushed
Without you by my side
You fingers intertwined with mine
Say no, say no
To loving another dear
For my fragile heart is still broken
Don't speak a word, another lie
I'll always be your's
My devoted dragonfly...

Say yes, say yes
To being together,
Forever and a day
Don't fret the lies that people
May spread amongst themselves
For I shall always be your servant
Your lover at least,
Forever and a day
My heart will always beat for you
And I shall remain by your side
Faith Melton Oct 2011
You once had my heat,
In the palm of your hand
Chained from the very start.

I was so torn apart,
But when I couldn't stand
You once had my heart.

You wheel it around in a cart,
You had to make me stand
Chained from the very start.

You words have become ****,
You were my grain of sand,
You once had my heart.

You have played your part,
You took away your hand
Chained from the very start.

You have torn me apart,
To the point where I couldn't stand
You once had my heart
Chained from the very start.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Did they tell you I'm leaving today?
I see you in my rearveiw mirror.
Did you realize your mistake?
I know tears are rolling down your face.

Did they tell you I'm a wreck?
I saw you messaged me.
Did you just realize you loved me?
You know it's too late.

Did they tell you that you lost your chance?
You're begging me to come back.
Did you know I hate goodbyes?
You said it everytime.

Did you realize it was just for today?
I told you how I felt.
Did they already tell you?
You should have believed them all along.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I'm all for the truth
Even if it hurts
I prefer the pain of honesty,
Not the pleasure of lies
If you hate me,
Can't you just say you do
Can you just let me go?
Staying here is burning me alive
I want freedom, to be apart from you
You're my keyless locks, chaining me down
Guitless, you ravage, my life, my sanity
Leave me be, it's only distruction you're causing
I'm almost done trying, I just don't want
To give up.
Just let me go
Him
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Him
I always wonder what feelings you have for me
Mine are quite obvious it seems.
Everyone knows, but it doesn't feel like you do.
I try so hard, just to make little observations
To see if you're trying to show
Just a little emotion for me

Can't you just tell me?
I want to know if you're mine...
I want to know if you and me exist
But I have my fears
Will you say no?
how
Faith Melton Oct 2011
how
How can you love
Something so torn?
How can you love
The remains of life and time?
A hallow form
of horrid memory and hate.
Always making choices,
always the wrong decision.
How can you feel for
a failed impressionist?
It's baffling,
how much love you possess.
It's confusing
how your affection never wavers.
Sometimes I think it's misplaced,
but the love and affection
will always be returned,
though disguised,
or afraid to show.
It will always be there
Faith Melton Jan 2012
The way it felt to kiss you as you said goodbye,
Warmth upon my lips, passionate, loving.
Your arms around me, protecting me from the world.
Hours spent talking to each other constantly.
Now it's gone, and it's all my fault.
Now I can't talk to you, or hope to feel your warmth
I never meant for it to go this far,
To end so quickly, just one blink and it's gone.
I'm just a monster hidden behind makeup.
A selfish soul in fake skin.
Pain has never felt more deserved.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I have a feeling you don't exist
Distance makes it easier to believe
I know you can be touched,
But I know that I cannot feel

I'm numb, inside out
Everything looks the same to me
Colors of the rainbow merge
and turn all the shades of gray

Laying, unmoving, staring
I watch stars as my mind races
Knowing that I'm not dreaming
I feel your presence within

You're consistantly on my mind
I know giving up isn't an option
All I've wanted to say is
I love you and I'm not afraid

But you're too far away to hear
Though I tell you in the depths
Of my sorrowed mind.
I feel like I'm dying

A ice cold hand has it's bitter grip
On my slow beating heart
It's chained without links
What's wrong with me?

Like an angel without wings
I feel trapped
Faith Melton Oct 2011
The fountain of youth
In a place unknown
Not marked on maps of old
Only heard of in stories told.
I don't care for the immortality
Or the fame and riches
I just want to feel the success
Of the discovery,
To lay my eyes upon its clear blue waters
If only for a moment,
I want to feast upon its glory
To gaze at its magnificent beauty
If only for a moment,
I want to reach
My own state of immortality
Even if
It's only a state of mind
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I find faults in my own actions,
I try, but I’m miles away from perfection.
Although it seems to be a fictional word,
After so long, it still has so many definitions.
As ages pass, they’re reworded, rephrased; but
Time seems so irrelevant to me,
Just a useless measurement of our life.
With no actual control, it rules us.
I find no safe state of mind
As I sink into my own misery.
I’m drowning in my own sorrow...
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I think you've figured I write about you
It's probably quite obvious.
I think I've fallen in love,
but baby you're not here...

Can you hear me?
I'm pleading for you.
It's so difficult knowing
There's too much road between us.

One day I'll pack my bags,
And we could be together.
Call me crazy,
I've fallen head over heels for you.

You're a rhythm in my head,
my beating heart is the drum.
my thoughts the guitar,
my voice the bass.

It's a sweet melody,
Just because you made it.
I'm intrigued by the way you speak.
Clever words the make me fall ever faster.

I'll kiss you, no regret.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
He came to us purely by accident
A spirit from beyond the veil
He does no wrong, he is an innocent
His words are a song
Waiting to be sung
By those who remain loyal
Who honor promises made
His name has undoubtful meaning
An act needing to be remembered
He seeks to avenge
Those who have done no wrong
But have the upmost evil
Done to them
He brings forth Justice
As himself and as his actions.
He is a knight,
A skillful man with a blade,
A hero of peace.
Our unrecognized savior
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Your plans are always second best
The lies you spread, useless
Secrets kept, you're unfit
War is the only option you wish,
Words are a hit and miss.
Violence is key in your endeavor
Power is your goal

Sleepless nights you lay planning
Ideas swarm your head,
No one has a choice but to follow
You're a ruler with strength
You hail to no one
You are a tyrant
Faith Melton Oct 2011
A rainy day
Would make this moment perfect
As I count the seconds in my head
And find no amount of time
Would ever change the mood

It's a almost dream come true,
Almost picture perfect.
It's only lacking one thing
Something misplaced,
Something missing...

As seconds turn to minutes
And the minutes just drag on
They feel like days, endless

I could be missing you,
Though I know I am
It's not a surprise...

Warm weather, summertime
It's months away
Just like you're out of reach.

Wishes seemingly useless,
Just like time, just this mood.
This lonely feeling,
I can't rid myself of, emptiness
Faith Melton Nov 2011
I'm tired of the lies,
The feelings you tend to hide.
The day to day stress
You always put me under.

I'm tired of the lies,
That empty look on your face.
That smile that you
Never show.

The guilt I hide,
Only meant to please.
Do you know how much
Damage you've inflicted?

The people who hate me
Seem to be the only ones
Able to see through this mask.

When you're upset,
Everyone tends to know.
You make no secret of it.

But when I am
The ones I hold close
Don't notice the difference
They believe my own lies.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I know I have a thousand things on my mind
And I have a million words to write
But this constant writers block
Is keeping me from these lyrics

I'm no good at writings songs
I can't really explain things in a few words
And there's nothing I can do if you
Don't believe the words I try to say

I have a lot on my mind,
And not all the paper in the world would
Be enough to hold all my thoughts in words
But I know it'd be enough if I could just
Hold your hand

I'd do anything for you, my inspiration
I could recite love quotes, write endless poems
I'd stay up all night on the phone, even if we have
Absolutely nothing to talk about for those hours

I'm no good at writings songs
I can't really explain things in a few words
And there's nothing I can do if you
Don't believe the words I try to say

I've got a lot on my mind,
Like my past, your present, our future
I contemplate phrases that could explain
Nothing seems to run together on paper

Just leave me here,
While I force thoughts into words
Cause I've got a lot to say
But I keep backing down
Where does this end?
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Laying in the closet
Unused, unwanted
Collecting cobwebs and dust
Buttons hanging by threads

It looks like an overused rag,
Falling apart and stained
It has seen many a special occasion
and caught many a mess

It lays dormant in the dark
Completely forgotten about
Like an useless item
To be thrown away
Faith Melton Oct 2011
My friends,
They’re lifeless stubs,
Jutting from the ground
I can’t recall how they looked
How they sounded
As the breeze
Touched their long arms
Making them rustle and creak
I stand alone
In an area of vast emptiness
My friends, murdered before me
Chopped, slugged, and pulled down
And I am Regretfully
The only one left standing
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I held onto my mother's hand
As she lead me, bare foot
Into the cool water.
A man look's at me weirdly
My mother said it was
Because of my skin color
But I couldn't see
Much difference between
him and me
Except he was a man
and I was a little girl
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I'm standing here
Trying to make this life on my own
I'm frozen,
The memory you gaze at.
I'm two summers ago,
Something you've forgotten.
This purpose is a curse
Capturing your memories
Holding them forever
Only to be thrown away
When you no longer care.
Wish you had me now?
I'm already gone,
wasted away.
I wasn't yours to keep
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Her lips have that clever smile
She doesn't know what's in her drink
Nor does she really care.
He's watching her, she's losing it.
He hands her that bag of golden brown
She drowns it in her veins

Everyone wants to be her,
Following in her wake
Destruction, mishaps.
She wants her escape,
That purple haze just isn't enough

It's in her water,
She doesn't know
She's having too much fun to notice
He throws an arm around her waist
To keep her from falling into window panes

She's a lying waste of space,
Her purity is lost,
All she's tastes are her drugs.
Everyone's starting to call her bluff
Faith Melton Nov 2011
Excitement - you just can't hide it,
Just one night, just one time.
It's all in the fun of the thrill.
And we just want to get off

No commitment - it's just one night,
No further contact, no relationship.
Both strangers, no name basis.
I want to get off, take it all off.

To live in the thrill - without consequence,
You don't have to disagree, I wont push.
We don't have to go all the way,
I just want a ******.

I don't steal - but I'm greedy,
I'll take until nothing is left.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Maybe I'm a nobody,
and everybody knows you.
Maybe I won't get far,
and you'll be famous
But you wont get there on wit.

Hey captain of the Barbie squad,
Did you bleach your hair?
Seems it comes with stupidity too
Miss know it all, but really doesn't

Brand name clothes?
They look expensive, oh dear
Is that a stain? Money wasted!
Still obsessing over your hair
In the bathroom mirror?

Did you see your boyfriend was cheating?
Oh wait, it was with me wasn't it?
Maybe you're that boring,
Same drama everday
"He said, she said" nonesense

So, miss I can do anything,
What happens when daddy's money fades?
Bills pile up?

So miss I can do anything,
Having fun being Queen now?
In the end you'll still be the same
Queen of the Brainless
Faith Melton Nov 2011
As I try to forget,
Simple words, simple phrases
I learn your lies,
Those things you call the truth
When I'm near tears,
And you're completely oblivious.
I can't stand to look,
To gaze upon your clueless eyes.
Are you willing?
To understand the mistakes.
The ones you made.
Are you ready to
Earn my forgiveness?
I don't think you'll understand.
For you're just being
Who you were born to be.
There is no right or wrong for you
Faith Melton Nov 2011
As I ponder my regrets
You make the top of them

I wish I could take back
Every thing I ever said.
All the wrong, all the lies

I should have spoke the truth
When I could,
When you would've believed me

I could have apologized,
I could have made amends
But I ignored that I did wrong
I was always right,
No matter what I did.
Oh, but how I was wrong,
Wrong wrong wrong....
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I don’t remember you
I don’t remember how,
You kissed me, or
How we spent countless
Hours on the phone.
The long hugs we shared
Just seem like faint dreams
In the back of my mind.
Not my memories
Of what use to be.

I don’t remember you,
How you made me laugh
For no reason at all.
How I got so nervous
By just seeing you.
It’s almost like
You don’t exist in me
Anymore

But there are things
I do remember
Like how you said,
We’d still be friends,
That you’d still care
And always be there.

So where are you now?
While I’m right here,
Holding the pieces
Of what you gave me
And you’re with her
Giving away what
Should have been
Mine

Would you even care to know
That I’m better off now?
Without your memory,
Without you holding me back.
I’m not like I was when I was with you.
I no longer hold back.
I’m comfortable in my own skin.
Would you even care
To know that
I’m in love
With your best friend?
Faith Melton Oct 2011
As beautiful as it is,
I know soon it'll be gone.
Let me be honest with you,
Each moment spent here
Makes me miss it more.
As darkness swallows
That big ball of blood red.
Imagine how it feels,
Being cloaked and hidden,
Fear consumed.
Dancing in the moonlight,
Stolen love.

Morning welcomes the new,
I stayed up all night,
I didn't want to miss it.
The scene painted golden,
As the sun rises.
The colors reflected in the water,
It's no wonder I can never forget
Faith Melton Jan 2012
I** know I'll live with this mistake this time,
Can't blame you for hating me now.
Blame me for it all,
You were perfect for me,
For me you did everything,
This is less than deserved
I'm not going to ask you back,
Sorry that you ever chose me.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Sickness and desire
Your heart is burning in the fire
Your disturbed soul dissolves
you face the problems no one can solve
The words you say are always dread
Spark the emotions you love to hate
Sadly it's me, I'm taking the bait
The dreaded lonely situation I face
I hate the way it feels, I hate its taste.
I can't wait to get home after a day of your ****
To watch the blood drain from my wrist
I love the way it feels as pain floods my body
My disturbed soul craves every bit
Now just leave me in frustration
Because Lately,
I’m Such a disgrace.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I'll let you in,
If you'll trade that heart of gold
So it can be mine to hold.
Lock and key,
I'll be your inspiration
If you'll be my melody.

You're my dream in reality.
My sanctuary dressed in light.
You're the only one I believe in
I wont break this memory apart
It was love from the start.
Faith Melton Oct 2011
Thundering, booming, loudness
Striking fear into young souls
Winds taking down loads
Rain turning up flower beds

I toss and turn
Through the night
My eyes wide open
The noise keeping me awake

I worry for tomorrow
The pouring rain
Pounding on the roof
Like a stampede**
Of angry horses

I wonder how tomorrow will look.
Will there be any sun
To gaze upon in the early morning?
Will there be any beauty?
Faith Melton Oct 2011
I want to be his girl,
but I'm not sure how to.
I want to be his only,
but I know I wont..
I can't make myself any clearer
I practice talking for hours,
watching that girl in the mirror.
She looks clever,
More confident than I.
She has that beautiful smile,
White teeth, plump lips
But I know I'm not her.
Perfect figure, straight posture
But I want to be her
Maybe then he'd notice
I want to be that girl,
Then one he watches
As she walks by,
The one he writes songs for.
The one he holds at night.
But I can't.
I'm not her,
No matter how hard I try.
I'm not the girl I see in the mirror
Faith Melton Oct 2011
She knows what she's doing.
Hair pulled back, a perfect smile
Bright blue eyes that sparkle

She's the girl everyone wants to be
Boys waiting on her, arm and leg
Waiting for the chance to be with her
It's not that easy

Hidden behind her fake smile,
Is the life no one wants.
Dad's ran away, Mom's full of hate
Perfect beautiful girl
Lives a life of anguish

She's the girl everyone wants to be
Perfectly fake, hiding behind lies
Screaming on the inside
She's alone in this life
Barely breathing, barely alive

She indulges in dishonesty
Wearing a colorful mask
Hiding all her shades of grey
Disguising it all with beauty

She's the girl everyone wants to be
Always deceitful, always insecure
So easily broken inside
Her body only a tomb
Faith Melton Nov 2011
I know that I'm awake
But I'm dreaming all the same.
My mind twisted in thoughts
It's one thing to say that
"Everything will be okay"
and sometimes those words
Just aren't enough to say.

Things can get so rough, I know.
I just need to be strong
To find something to hold onto
As hours slip away.
For me to regain happiness
Would take years to accomplish.

I struggle to describe in sentences,
Of how you make this easier for me
But I'm at a lost for words ...
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