Whiskey whispers in my ear all night  
Bruised hand caressing my thigh
Your grip is tight & I can’t move
Stolen kiss upon my neck
Who told you that you could do this
Powder your nose and take a shot
You won’t love me in the morning

One pill after another
Heart is beating fast
Snort another line
Down another bottle
We no longer feel
This is what we need to feel alive
Even though we’re trying to die

Who knew silver would draw red?
Dotted paradise
Raised, red skin
Vertical for results
Horizontal for pain
Who am I
Does this define me
So much pain & hurt between the lines
Trying to breath but suffocating under pressure
One more wont hurt

You said you wouldn’t let drugs become a problem
Here you are snorting lines like nothing matters
Letting these drugs eat away at your brain and nose
Clenched jaw, sweaty hands, bad temper
Who even are you anymore
I just want my friend back, who you were before the drugs.. before the fall...before this mess
Where did you go

Pick up the bottle to drink away your sorrows
Pop another pill to not feel
Snort another line to remember you’re alive
Grab the blade and slice away the pain
Let the bad things define your soul
Hurt a little more
Love a little less
Who are we living for

It sounds so beautiful at this point
You get endless flowers
No more pain
You can finally be at peace right
Maybe death isn’t as bad as we think
We become reborn into someone who isn’t hurting anymore
So pop another addy and drink that whiskey till you don’t wake up
Razor blades and car crashes call your name
Don’t fear the end

I seen you at your worst
Still think you’re the best
Holding you tight
Pushing your broken pieces back together
Saw the wounds on your heart
Stitched you back up
Is this love

What is love? Love is pain
You can love so hard and it still won’t be enough
Put your heart on the line just to get hurt
Help everyone else when you’re the one suffering
Who is going to love you?
The answer is no one because you don’t matter
No matter how hard you love

Why is starting over so hard
Nobody said it would be easy
We as people expect things to come naturally
That is why we are at fault for the bad things
We need to be a better us
As one together
Let’s try

You left me stranded there with no way out
My heart on my sleeve
Eyes filled with tears
How do I deserve this pain
I only show love and support
I’m crashing down again but this time, no one can stop the bad things from happening
Whatever happens, happens
Gone

We all want someone to have our back
No matter how bad things are we long for that feeling
You could be the worst person but someone still longs for you
Some don’t deserve the title “Friend” but receive it anyway because they are great manipulators
Don’t let the bad in to ruin your good

The end is coming soon than anyone thinks
How can you plan for it
You can’t plan for the big event
You are stuck and have to suffer through what happens
Don’t worry
The end is near

Whiskey breath down the back of my spine
Bruised hand following my tailbone
Chapped lips on my neck
Blood covered thighs and aching insides
Who was I now... nobody
Words spoke to imply intimidation
Intoxicated by your lies
Penetrated by betrayal

Pill after pill, another sleepless night
We thought this was a part of “livin my best life”
Now you’ve been up for three days because adderall took over your life
So did the blade, that you use so harshly
We’re hurting but we wanted to grow up so bad, right
Will we ever be living our best life while struggling with past terrors and addiction?
Help

I never loved my name until I heard your voice say it
Explosions of love burst in my heart
Your touch is ever so gently
Each kiss reminds me why I fell in love
You kiss away each part of my self mutilation
Together we are a beautiful disaster
Both broken like we’re about to drift away like dust in the wind but together we’re stuck like glue
In this story we don’t break, bind, or bend
We love, trust, and care

He sung to me with his beautiful, soft yet masculine voice
I smiled so big that night
Eyes met closely
Hand and hand, felt like a movie
Nothing but happy endings on this wonderful, starry night

Mascara smudged eyes
Lipstick stained lips
Blurred vision
Lost mind
Gelatin brain
Sluggish body
Drugged girl
Ripped blouse

Crimson dots appear as the cold metal draws beautiful lines as straight as the roads that take you to nowhere
Black skies and lying eyes tell all
Long sleeves conceal the secrets held ever so tightly
How deceptive of me to make you believe that the words “I am okay” truthfully read that there was nothing to worry about
Bleeding out and all you can hear is my veins emptying like water tapping on the roof after a big storm

Lost in the brain waves of harsh reality
Teeth grinding, pupils huge, awake for 72 hours
Little blue addies on the cover of Addiction for Dummies
Pop one, two, three no more feelings just a body stuck in a bad wavelength and the mind is racing like the horses at the track hoping to win the big prize

Time is effortless so they say
We get lost like it’s the path we belong to
I cannot escape the dangers of the man who watches me in the shadows
Always there, waiting & watching
I cannot speak or I will be punished with his whip of harsh words that break the skin and soak into my veins like the drugs that I snort.

***** hand slides down an innocent thigh
Untouched now becomes ******
Miles & miles of skin now unholy but not by choice
These moments are damaged by the hand of the Devil
They ask how could you allow this like you had a say while being gagged by lies and tied down by the truth.