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You were the only man i had always wanted to see
Walking down the road to the sea
Swaggering in your new jacket
Looking for fellas to bracket

In Carrickfergus they called you a robber
To me you were a handsome rover
Beautiful green eyes as the rolling hills
Your happy thoughts into me you had instilled

In Belfast you smuggled your hopes and fears
Slainté! You danced pints of beer away
Alas! They did not see your tears
You were on your own finding your way

My old friend, my sad handsome friend Patrick...
Alone you sang your weary songs and turned sick
I cried bitterly, nobody to lay you down
Summer,and you had no wheat to sow

Ah! You were so handsome and young
During summer days you smiled and cheered me up in my den
Calling out your name,i screamt at the top of my lungs.
You were gone....gone...you would never answer again
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I was waiting

Life just kept on running
While i was waiting
But you never showed up
And very slowly i started to realize i was trapped

It kept getting heavier each time i breathed
Was it me making those eerie sounds i heard?
I was left in the endlessnes of time
You had said 'just forget the world for a while'

My coffee was getting cold
I whispered your name as i had been told
One of those days i had thought that i could have seen you again
But turned out i knew i was just insane

I put more sugar into my coffee and stirred it
Wondering if i would be able to ever drink more bitter coffee again without thinking of you
Then i left it on the table....
I was waiting for you....
God please don't **** me before i find Your flaws...
Life nowadays is full of men who are either corrupt or unacquainted with any laws...
You created us all after Your own image but each time i look into the mirror i see a blood-thirsty devil.
I've seen too much blood shed and You stand still

God please no more empty reveries.
This world needs more recoveries
Religons are made for vultures
I see nothing but promises in my future

God we need no prophecies
Your divine presence is highest infinity
I am a soul-eater by Your Holy creeks
******,but i know my good greed

Endlessness in heaven is acceptable.
But mortality is the greatest gift here on earth as our days are getting more destructible.
You catch our every tear and capture our every prayer.
Before You we bow,with our innocent endearing.
Blinded by obedience and unstateable feelings.

They are not close to heaven...nor are we to Hell
The 'dark matter',our very hearts,under Your holy spell
God,Thou art one paradox before men and angels
Remain a mystery,an enigma,a divine angler
G.F.Ferguson/September 2010
i woke up this morning and you weren't there lying next to me.
For a moment i thought you had left earlier.
But you hadn't because then i saw you there sitting by the window.
I walked across the room,put my arms around your waist and felt the wind gently blow.

You turned around,i closed my eyes and  you hugged me so tight.
I could feel your heart beating so close to mine.
My life is a game of love,and with you i wish i was paired.
I opened my eyes and you weren't there...you turned into air...
G.F.Ferguson,September 29,2010
I packed my things when you were still deep in your sleep.
I wandered around the room,barefoot,i knew there was no promise to keep.
A ray of gloomy light seeping through,morning rain had clouded up your windows.
You're only a ring away i know  

But i have to go,i missed the last night train.
Here i am at my stop just waiting.
A stranger, no way i'd change back.
I'm going nowhere for you to track.
X : Do you love me or not?
Y : i do if you do,i don't if you don't
X : Does it mean you love me or not?
Y : i love you if you love me and i don't love you if you don't love me.
X : what if i i didn't love you?
Y : then i wouldn't love you.
X : what if i had been lying when i said i loved you?
Y : then i might have loved you but i don't love you.
X : i just want to know if you love me or not.
Y : Ask me then ...whether i love you or not and i'll give you the answer tommorow.
X : Okay,i'll ask you tomorrow...
I started to write a letter.
It's amazing how each word changed colors everytime i thought of you.
Your delicious voice that makes me feel like i've eaten enough for the rest of my life.
How i smell the sweetness air that blows through the forest i used to go each time you touch me.
How i hear such a heavenly tune when you kiss me.
How i see bright rays of lights dancing in front of me each time you sing to me.

Every sound in the world emitting such beautiful colours....
But your voice is the only colour i see....
Your skin is the only perfume i smell on mine...
Your voice is a cup of honey i have a taste of
Your love is the only song i hear

The green breeze smiled on my skin.
With all my singing heart i touch your colours with love.
i drink your every touch with such a gentle desire...
I listen to your body....moving closer to mine...
With our colours i extract a bottle of perfume and paint the air with stars.

Listen to my touches,my heavenly song...
I'm in love with you so red....
This day has smiled at me...
As you looked into my honey-heart
"he is walking down the road so happily. he is going to propose to the love of his life today. They had talked about this a few months ago. Living together without a shame. Having kids and becoming parents. What more could he want? This morning when he woke up,he could see a soft ray of sunlight seeping in through the window. For a moment he knew where his life was going to. This girl who has madly make him beg on his knees asking for love. She's the reason he changed his mind about many things in life. They say a man could love more than just once. But not him. He knows that this girl is the only one he wants to grow old with. 'till death or maybe debts do us part' he thought hahaha.....
Oh There she is standing at the door.... So beautiful and heavenly.... Looking into his eyes with such unbearable feelings....
He opens his mouth,begging on his knees....  'will you marry me........?'
She smiles.''

And just like that i woke up finding myself standing in front of her house. It was raining. She had declined my proposal a few months ago. And ever since,every morning i always woke up and found myself sitting in front of her house,staring at it vaguely. The pine trees were my wittnesses. They saw a man who had been cutting wounds on his own heart.
Why did God do this to us?
Why did everyone have to despise us?
Did we do anything wrong?
Or is it just because into this world we were born?

How long has it been since the last time i saw your beautiful face?
they did not understand how pure our feelings for each other were...
We lived in a circle of loneliness
And the wounds they cut on our skins would remain the same

Living my true life is like secretly reading a forbidden book late at night when the world is asleep.
Being myself is like being stranded in a land where rain never stops falling
Speaking up my own truth in a dark trance of my deepest dreams.
Where my shadow is the only light i see.
Where my heartbeat is the only sound i hear.

I'm transparent and glass-like
Easily read,hands outstretched
Exposed and hurt,unto the world i am
My tunnels of night have no end...

If i could choose where and when...
I would go back to the day i first saw you. Swaggering on your way home without fear.
You said 'being a man is not about being a man. it is about living your life as your heart tells you'.
  
This forbidden passion we shared
These secret touches you poured into me
these kisses that healed my wounds.
You were the willow tree i leant on by the river of despair.....
When the Sun laughs...
The Moon laughs
The Earth laughs
The Stars laugh

When The Sun cries...
The Moon cries
The Earth cries
The Stars cry

It's only us not laughing and crying....
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